Is marriage an obligation??

It was difficult coming up with a topic to express what I decided to share with you guys through the article, I true life scenario prompt me to write this because youths are making a particular mistake that results in early divorce in marriage nowadays.

What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear the word "Marriage"?

For me, it should be an everlasting trip of happiness and love but it is the other way round because we are doing things wrongly. These things we are attaching to marriage make us exhaust the resources needed to travel for 100 years in just 1 year.

I would like to share a brief story first.

Richard and Rose were good friends, they met somehow at a gathering and became very close friends. Rose was in her mid twenties and a student in her 3rd year studying Chemical Engineering while Richard runs a company specialized in event planning and he is a millionaire in his thirties.

Rose came from a poor family and she was all the investment her parent had because they gave everything they had just to ensure that she becomes great in life and she would be able to take them out of poverty. It was a great tragedy when Rose got a call that her father died in an accident while returning from work, she knew it was the end of her dream of becoming a graduate. the

She became different and started cutting herself out of the world, she couldn't find her way out of the valley of depression. Richard noticed and checked on her but she didn't give them a chance, he later got in touch with her and they decided to meet. The meeting was a great one for Rose as Richard promised to sponsor her education just for friendship's sake, she got over her sadness and became best friends with Richard.

She visited him often during the school break, she helped him with chores cooking, and other things but she was always disturbed by the fact that she hasn't met a lady in his house before. To avoid starting a relationship conversation, she didn't ask him anything and kept their relationship as friends.

Soon, she was through with her studies and went for her youth service. She remained single throughout school because of the disappointment in her last relationship that led to her aborting a pregnancy. To avoid anything that would affect her studies, she decided to stay out of relationships.

On returning from service, Richard organized a small dinner for her and they got deep into the relationship conversation but Richard didn't mention why he hasn't married. He took advantage of the conversation and the mood to ask her out but she refused it immediately and begged him to keep their friendship the way it was.

Richard felt disappointed due to everything he has done for her but he didn't say anything but instead apologized to her. Rose got home and felt sad because she felt like an ingrate and after thinking about it again, she felt the best way to pay back the kindness was getting into a relationship with Richard. She picked up her phone and apologized to him, she gave him the response he wanted.

Things started getting deeper but Rose wasn't really into it because she wanted marriage and not just a relationship. She rarely visits him and would always want them to meet in a public place because she didn't want to make the previous mistake she did. Two months later, she insisted on marriage and Richard felt like he was forced to get married to her.

The marriage happened and they started living together as a couple and she got pregnant a few months after the marriage. Unfortunately for her, she had a miscarriage that didn't happen naturally. Richard was responsible but how?

He is a drug addict but he successfully hid that habit from rose, when Rose knew it wasn't easy for her to quit so easily. She regrets getting fooled by his kindness and felt the best way of repaying everything was marrying him since he asked her out. Rose became a punching bag and she got to know that she wasn't his first wife, he was previously married to someone who left him because he beats her always.

It got so worse for Rose that she made up her mind to leave the marriage because she has developed health issues as a result of frequent abuse from Richard.

I am single who loves exploring the relationship world just for learning and sharing my opinion with people as well.

We youth of today sees marriage as an obligation and sometimes repayment of kindness which is very wrong. I will touch few mistakes we make in the world today which have made marriages crash very early.

Relationship as repayment of kindness

It is a silly idea to fall in love with someone because they rendered a big help to us. As humans, we develop feelings that lead to relationships and probably marriage in the end.

The feelings we share between each other matter a lot and must be considered when talking about relationships, it is better to stay be single than going into a relationship that doesn't have any feelings in its foundation.

Marriage with pity:

Falling in love with someone because you pity them is another bad idea because, along the line, the pity expires and the marriage starts crumbling.

I have seen people who cook up lies just to make you have a soft heart for them so that they can take advantage of you. Tell you how they were been jilted in their previous relationships and paint themselves good.

If you don't have feelings for someone, don't let their stories deceive you. Most of the relationships built on a foundation of pity don't last and the victim ends up being used.

Marriage for selfish reasons.

I used the word selfish because it involves going into a relationship due to the things we will benefit from it.

This is the common of all mistakes and it is happening every day because some of the youth don't want to work so when they see someone who has made it big, they will anything just to be part of the person's life.

Most of the relationships that start for this purpose end up crashing early and the ones that last long don't experience true love and happiness.

Every relationship must start with having affection for each other and anything aside from that could be a waste of time, I would rather prefer not to start a lifetime journey than see it end so quickly.

It is funny people see these things every day, read them in papers, watch them in movies, and yet some people still choose to walk on the path to destruction. If someone got away with it doesn't guarantee that you will get away with it as well, some succeeded, some failed, some failed and came out unharmed while some even died in the process.

Every mistake we make is a lesson to others, it is a wise thing for us to learn from others' mistakes as well.

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