“All of my ‘let’s just be friends’ are friends I don’t have anymore, how do you not check on me when things go wrong, guess I should have tried to keep my family closer, much closer”

These are the lyrics from Keep The Family Close by Drake.

Earlier today, I was listening to music through Bluetooth speaker, and this above song started playing. It sparked thoughts in my head and I decided to write about it.

Family

Family are those we are related to by blood. Whilst it is impossible to choose those we are related to by blood, they are our first friends and loved ones. Family include both our immediate and extended family.

I believe we can choose our family, though they might not be related to us by blood, they are our love ones too, and I talk about our friends. They are our family not related to us by blood. This was one of the thoughts I had reading an article by @Princessbusayo titled ‘Friend and Follower’.

Growing up in a nuclear family of six, I have always been the quiet one. There are times when everyone is seated in the sitting room - the entire family – discussing, sharing stories and making jokes. Our youngest sibling laughing and asking questions about things he doesn’t understand. And there I am, in the midst of all these jokes and conversation, keeping a straight face and saying nothing, unless when spoken too.

My parents always knew I am not exactly the social cub, I am the least social of their children. And this has affected my relationship with my extended family members.

I remember when I gained admission into the university, because the school I have just been admitted to is located in my state of origin and many of my extended family members are there, my father had specifically told me to be closer to them, “call and visit them often” he said.

I have been living close to many of my family members for about 4 years now, and I can’t proudly say that I heeded to what my dad had advised. I can not also say I didn’t try to visit/call them often, I did try to visit my aunt and cousins when I can. But sometimes, even you know your efforts are not satisfactory.

When I come home for holidays, my father would always tell me about the complaints of my relations, and how they are not pleased with the frequency of my visits. And even more so with how often I call them.

Listening to Drake’s lyrics, I thought about how family are who you will always run to in your time of needs. When the chips are down, they will stick with you, through and through. And when I say family, I also refer to your REAL FRIENDS.

So, while you don’t have the liberty to choose the family related to you by blood, you do have the liberty to choose those not related to you by blood, and you should choose them wisely and carefully.

CONCLUSION

It is the season of love. And not once have I not spent Christmas with my family. While you are with family, endeavour to make the happiest of memories and build a stronger relationship with them. I have made a conscious decision to do better and bring my family closer. I am not saying it is impossible to have a family member that doesn’t want to best for you or have feelings towards you.

Of course in that case, steer clear of them as your happiness and peace is as important as a strong relationship with family.

If you have friends you genuinely love and there seem to have been a drift between the two of you, reach out to them and try to mend the relationship.

Some years ago I saw the words ‘The importance of building relationships cannot be overemphasised’ and it has stuck with me ever since. It practically changed me into a more social person and I have learnt to relate more with people.

Thank you for reading ✍🏿