Right love, No enough time

[October 2,2021|Saturday]

"Ma'am, which is more painful? Meeting the right person in the wrong time or meeting a wrong person in the right time?"

One of my classmates dropped such intriguing question, leaving the whole class to be in chaos. Different opinions were heard, arguments were laid and loud noises filled the four corners of the room.

"Of course, it's more painful when you meet a wrong person in the right time. Imagine, you are ready to commit and be in a relationship but your love and efforts were just wasted because your partner is just a wrong person for you. Ang sakit kaya no'n!" one of my classmates uttered in conviction.

Some reiterated and agreed but there are others who opposed.

"No, I think mas masakit 'yong right person in the wrong time kasi wala kayong magawang dalawa because the time is not just right. Itinigil niyo kasi kailangan. Tinapos kasi mali at hindi pwede," my other classmate concurred.

"Boom bars!"

"Ganiyan talaga ang linyahan ng mga katoliko na nainlove sa INC," sigaw ng isa na siyang nagpahalakhak sa lahat.

Mahina akong natawa sa naging sagutan ng mga kaklase ko pero nabigla ako nang makita ang unti-unti pamumuo ng mga luha sa gilid ng mga mata ni Ma'am.

I saw how she was caught off-guard by the question.

"Ikaw, Ma'am. What is your opinion about this?" singit ng isa.

Lahat kami ay tuluyan nang nakatingin sa kaniya. She slightly adjusted the gold-rimmed eyeglasses at the bridge of her nose as she let out a small smile.

"If I were to answer which is more painful among the two, well... none of the choices," she smiled faintly.

Ms. Quizon crossed her arms as she plastered a small smile. I was mesmerized by her beauty for a moment. She's already in her mid 20's and I could say that she aged gracefully.

Kita ko ang mariing paglunok ni Ma'am bago siya nagsalita.

"They said, meeting the right person in the wrong time is the worst heartbreak that can ever happened to you. But no one had no idea how painful it is to meet the right person in the right timeline, in the right place and in the right version of reality.

Yeah, everything seems to fall in the right places— it's just that, there's no enough time for the both of you."

"What do you mean, Ma'am?" tanong ng isa.

"Well, to put it simply, it's more painful to be with the right person but no enough time," she answered painfully.

Everyone was just in silence and we let our teacher tell us a story which happened in her life long years ago.

"So, I met this guy named Mark and we were in a relationship for eight years."

I saw how Ms. Quizon flustered by just merely uttering her boyfriend's name.

"And then what happened next, Ma'am?"

"Mark was a loving boyfriend to me. He had been consistent with his actions and he never fails to put a curve on my lips."

While hearing those words, it seems like the butterflies in the universe migrated to my stomach.

I also heared some giggles coming from the class.

"Wow, mukhang in love si Ma'am," komento ng isa.

"Being in love is just an understatement of how devoted I am to my man," Ma'am Quizon quickly supplied.

"Mark completed me," she smiled. "Siya lang ang lalaking kumumpleto sa pagkatao ko. He knows how to calm down the demons in my head and he knows how to dance along with my nightmares. He taught me the meaning of life even if he couldn't see the meaning of his. Mark kissed away all the devils from my past, embraced my scars and perfectly accepted my imperfections."

I suddenly clutched my chest as I felt my eyes starting to water.

Damn, that was so heartfelt!

"At the age of 17, I found the purest love that a man could ever give to a woman. Mark became my safe haven. With him I felt at peace and in his arms, I felt at home."

After uttering those words, there, the tears that she suppressed for too long finally fell down.

Hindi ko na rin napigilan ang maluha.

"I had loved Mark at the right time and at the right version of reality. Everything was right— it's just that we had no enough time."

Tuluyan nang napahagulhol si Ma'am.

"Because Mark found someone else," her voice broke.

"Did he cheat, Ma'am?"

Ms. Quizon just smiled painfully.

"No, he didn't. He had no affairs with other girls but he found someone else."

"What do you mean, Ma'am?"

Mas lalong napaluha si Ma'am sa harapan namin.

"Because right after we celebrated our eight years anniversary, Mark was diagnosed of having a stage three brain cancer," she smiled faintly.

All of us gasped. Parang may bumabara sa lalamunan ko.

"Then what happened?" This time, I finally asked.

"I became Mark's strength. I didn't let him see I was falling apart because it was only me, who can save our relationship."

"But after choosing him everyday and encouraged him to live everyday, I've realized that everyday wasn't enough for us to have a happy ending afterall."

Ms. Quizon wiped her tears and she fakedly smiled.

"Because for years of battling with cancer, Mark finally told me that he found someone else who can be his home for an everlasting rest."

"Who was it?"

Ms. Quizon bitterly smiled before she continued.

"It was God," her voice broke. "He found comfort and peace in God's hands than in my arms," she whispered painfully.

And there, I bursted in tears. All of the class finally broke down.

"And that's when I requested his doctor to remove the life support that kept him alive for years. Tuluyan ko na siyang ipinaubaya sa itaas," hagulhol niya.

"He was my home and I'm home sick of two arms that I can no longer hold forever," she cried.

"I hated him at first for leaving me. I even tried to convince myself that he was selfish because he left me but soon enough, I later understand that it was so selfish of me to try to make him stay and live even if he badly wanted to rest."

Iyak lamang kami nang iyak.

"We had so many dreams to fulfill, family to build and memories to create but all of those things have been taken away because the truth is— we are right person to each other but we had no enough time for a happy ending."

And there, my heart broke down completely.

"It's been long years since Mark left me but no one can ever replace him to the point that I can never love back again because I know for that fact that I'll look for him in the faces of other people. I will still search for him in the faces of other men. He was my greatest love afterall," she smiled faintly.

"Me and my man became in a relationship at the age of 17 and I know we were too young for that. And I may sound stupid in front of you, but trust me, the love you give at the age of 17 might also be the purest love you can give in your lifetime," Ms. Quizon smiled genuinely.

All of us silently cried in our chairs, letting our hearts burst in pain.

"I guess, this is the painful part of finding pure love in a man. Because once it ends, it would also be your greatest heartbreak."

Iyak lamang kami ng iyak.

"But do you know what's the best part of my story even if it ended tragically?"

Ms. Quizon smiled and for one last moment, she cried.

"Because even though we were right persons for each other with no enough time— it was never a waste of time loving him and I know that what happened between us was real."

For one last moment, everyone of us cried but this time— with a smile on our faces.

-Thank you:)

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