@Fyangzee24 10 March 2022

So, you found someone else 😶 It's another cuddle-weather everyone. Every time the weather is like this I feel so extra single. Is it just me? Hahaha. I hardly fall asleep because I'm scheduled to get my booster shot later this afternoon. I super duper hate needles. It's been 4 months since I got my first dose and second dose. I hope nothing serious reactions will occur to my body because I really hate being sick. I got bored the other day and I just view some stories of my Facebook friends. Every time something amuses me, I'll react or leave a comment. Then, I saw this story without looking at the person who posted it, it's just a meme about the price hike of gasoline.

I find it so hilarious that I reacted and leave a comment then, when I saw in my messenger, my ex's name is at the top. I panicked because I was too confident in commenting. I was thinking of deleting the message I sent but it would be so cynical. Girl, don't be so sus. It's just a reaction. I just consoled myself. Then I received a reply from him. For sure he was surprised to see my name on his messenger too. We met 4 years ago by a common friend, we get along and fell for each other. He's younger than me. I was in my 3rd year in college at that time and he was in his first year in college. We have a lot in common that is probably what made me fall for him because he can relate to all the things I like. At first, I have no intention of putting our friendship to the next level because first of all he is younger than me, and I don't like our friendship going to waste. I already know that time that I can't keep a relationship because I easily get bored and withdraw all my feelings. But, he insisted that we should try it out. The first month was so good and I thought that it was going in to be different this time but the second month came, I felt it again. I broke up with him. I reasoned with him that I should not be in a relationship when my family is going through some problems. Yes, that's how baddie I am. I am not proud of using my family just to get out of the relationship. I dumped him over the phone. He was studying in Tacloban so we're kind of like having a long distance relationship. He never gave up pursuing me again but for me, what's done is done. Backtracking over these few years, I realized I wasted such a precious person. As our conversation went along, I never felt any hatred or bitterness coming from him. He's still the guy I was exchanging conversations with 4 years ago. I kind of missed the feeling. I thought if ever I'll open my heart to people who already became a part of me, I'll let him and I'll make sure I'll do this thing right. Suddenly, I read on my screen that he cleared my nickname. That means all those years he kept my nickname on messenger. Slowly, I realized why he removed my nickname. I told him, jokingly you deserved to be happy, out of nowhere after he removed my nickname. I even acted as that I don't remember my nickname on his messenger. He said thank you and asked me how did I know? As if I'm slow and insensitive.

I was disappointed by my own assumptions. I think I'm just bored again to think that the idea of "us" is still possible. But, I just end up brought down to earth and I'm just comforting myself again so I'll not feel bad at all knowing that he has already someone. What do I expect, right? It's just me who's so romantically hopeless. Anyway, I still want him to be happy. We ended our conversation with a good note and probably we're back as friends. I promised I'll support him no matter what, I'm the big sis, after all, 😁🤧 Have a Blessed Friday, Everyone ❤ Lead image from Google.