I'm typing this article for almost 2 hrs already but I can't focus because a friend that close to my heart is broken-hearted and in pain, I have to be Dr. Love again...while I'm giving some serious advice, my fiance and our other friend keep on teasing him in our group chat and I just send "ang g*go nyo", I can't even joke because I can feel his pain, being an empath s*cks. He is a special person to me because we're friends for almost 10 yrs. through thick and thin. Anyways, I'm lost hahaha, my topic is not about him lol.
Wanna share why I still trust strangers even if I build walls to protect myself. I'm a soft-hearted person and trust people easily. I used to see the beauty in every situation, I used to see the good side of people even if I know their bad traits. But I changed when the guy that I used to trust made something bad to me. I thought that we're friends but he took advantage of me and did something terrible that deserved a punch on his face. For the first time in my life, I was able to punch someone that used to be my friend.
Another story is about my high school bestfriend. I cut her out of my life and blocked her in my social media because she's so toxic. She accused me of something even if I explained my side. I only explained once because if she's really a friend, she won't accused me of something that I'm not. Well, that's life, I'm used to it.
The last people that I cut from my life are those people that stabbed me in the back because of money. The only mistake that I did was to trust them 100%, even with my credit card. As I said, I trust people easily, but they're not just random people out there, they're my friends, I treated them as my siblings but still money matters to them more than our friendship. That's when I started to build a wall for myself not to get hurt by people that I used to loved and cared for..
When I resigned, and now managing our small business at home. I don't have a staff yet that I can talk to, my team is busy with their job so I can only talk to them after shift. That's when I explore the internet. I looked for a side hustle to maximize our internet, the monthly bill is not that cheap lol. That's when I started to open up myself to strangers. Because I believe that strangers are just friends we haven't met yet. Those people that I mentioned above, I know them all personally and they still chose to stabbed and hurt me. So what will be the difference if I trust other people this time?
I started to share some stories of my life by writing articles at Kiki, it's new to me because I don't usually open up to others, even my secrets to my relatives and friends. I just vent out and express my emotions on that platform and as time goes by I met amazing people. I treat them as my friend, genuinely. I cared for them even if we didn't know each other personally. Though I have walls, I still trust when I feel comfortable with the person. I'm a talker lately because I don't have someone to talk to on a regular basis. I'm working alone most of the time hahahaha.
To my virtual friends, thank you for being with me virtually. You may not know me personally but I do care for you genuinely. Thank you for making me smile and laugh from a simple conversation, up to your funny and inspiring posts. You're a big part, why my sanity is still intact during these times of pandemic.
I don't trust everyone online of course haha, I'm not that naive anymore. I have high walls to other people but I put them down to some because I believe in my guts that those people I chose to trust and open up myself are kind-hearted people. 🖤
I easily do trust people as well. Thinking that all of them are good but of course there will still be some who have motives and would use your trust for granted. Part of life. So we have to learn who to trust next time.