@Fionaa 22 October 2020

Life in vain

One day while chatting with one of my very close sisters, I asked, sister, the dark circles under your eyes are so dark you don't notice! How dry the hair is, the filth of the face is gone. Canoe do not take care of yourself! Laughed and said, Anika tea, tea? She did not pay much attention to my words. She made tea and handed me a mug of tea and said, well, Anika, you write !? I replied, Tuktak Apu. Canoe! Apu said, not like that! You know what life means Anika! I said, I don't know. Because, to me, what life means, it can't be anyone else's. So I just know the life I see. Life is not the only life I see. Life has many meanings. She laughed and said, yes, Anika! Life is really like life. (I'm trying to understand sister) Life is bad, life is dishonest, life is selfish to life, life is life as it is, life is jealous, life means life is what it wants. I don't mean life. Life wants me, I don't want life! Even if you don't want to, you have to take your life away! The author's sister said that the canoe! I shook my head a little and said, sister, you are older, you know better than me! The forehead said to Kuch, Oops Anika, please don't say that so cold, I expect a lot of good things from you. I said, sister, life is so cold. Believing in life so cold emotion. Life is so cold !!! Sister was surprised and said, this is why you like Anika. I said a word, and you explained something with words! I laughed and said, this is the last resource sister! I'm still alive because I can talk. Leave me alone. What happened to you! Why are you so careless? That's it! There is silence. The eyes are tricking! Hut began to say softly, you know Anika, there was a time when I fell in love with your brother, then we used to go around in a rickshaw and eat panipuri at TSC. I used to buy bangles for 30 rupees and read bangles with my hands full. I used to buy big tips from the front of New Market. Your brother likes to have a big tip and a raised eyebrow with kajal in his eyes. I used to wear loose clothes. Your brother also liked it a lot. It was your brother's bad temper to hug and caress. I used to say, I'm tired, it will stink. You know what he used to laugh !? He used to say, what a stench in love again! Anika got married after ending a lot of love, pride and quarrels. Your brother would have noticed if he had smiled less at one time, why am I not smiling! Why are I talking less! But look, it's been 8 years since the marriage, I don't get any more emotion in this flat, car, expensive perfume, expensive clothes. Night after night, without sleeping, dark circles have accumulated under the eyes, I have become fat, I smell. The big press seems to be famous. It looks more like a slum. It is useless to wait without eating! Time has given me the patience to listen to these now. I'm not used to going to Anika's night party. I am a lover or wife waiting to cook rice. I am not a friend who swallows wine worth a thousand rupees, I am a lover who drinks water worth 20 rupees. Time could not change me from lover or wife Ray! Time has made the boyfriend who did only 3000 rupees tuition a huge businessman. And one of my sky moonlight has taken away from me! Smartness is what I don't talk about today. Talking less and doing more work has made a home today. Today only silence is true. Everything else is a lie. I'm crying! Apu just closed her eyes and said, Anika will eat! Today I have made my own rice and rice! Thank you.