Tales of Eyes
"Men are not punished for their sins but by them" she shudders with the edge of her voice. Her eyelids flutters as she reflects her entire life knowing it will soon be gone. Her brain was starved of oxygen as I heard her struggle for her last jagged breath before giving to the darkness which awaits her.
She glared at me making it impossible for me to sleep that night and I can still remember the fright in her eyes as I watched her skin turned pale. Her hair was still plugged by his left hand as blood soaked her pyjamas and for a moment, I found myself in her state of mind dying with her potentials. My God! this memory had hunted me for years anytime I remember the symphonies from her hands which could play a violin, guitar and harp. She was the best, believe me.
He dug the dagger deeper into her floating ribs while I remained a coward. Too fearful to save her; I couldn't stop blaming myself for her death until I decided to take laws into my hands because It felt so painful to watch her loose her feet to the ground while her eyes rested towards the blue sky. Before she closed her eyes for the last time, she stuttered something only him could hear although I felt she was talking to me.
The time was 5:15am and she died in a glimpse of light within darkness on a Tuesday morning. "What will I tell her mother? Wouldn't she affirm her claims that I've never been worthy of her daughter? this and that lingered through my thoughts causing me more grief than death that I obliged for therapy; self therapy of drugs but never abuse until I became an addict.
He smiled the moment she passed on and I remember wishing I had a gun. Naive me at seventeen with no knowledge of courage except some love I found with her. I couldn't face him, regardless it wasn't his time but hers because for a moment I saw her ghost hovering around its corpse in its endless sleep surrounded by nature. It's like this was a fragment of my imagination but I saw her say, "There is no such thing as a really calm sea. Always, always, there is motion" I still don't fully grasp what it meant but I understood something, she had her own secret.
My eyes bulged in disbelief when he turned to face me. All these while, he knew I was around. "What were you thinking" he wailed pointing the dagger at me. I had to think cos I needed to survive so I swallowed the camel and stepped forward. "You've got a chance" something whispered before he threw the dagger at me and pulled a gun behind him. it's a silver revolver and my first time to see a gun, a real gun so I chickened out.
With the gun in his hand, he forced me to wear his shirt while I wore his. He quickly brushed his bloody hands on me then commanded me to pick the dagger. He knocked me to the ground with his gun then grinned, "You'll pay for the humiliation she caused me"
I can't say exactly but the next minute, people started rushing into our apartment and it gave me great hope that justice just arrived until he whispered something to a strange man who suddenly pointed me to the crowd, "He killed her" he groaned pointing at the dagger before me. I was stained with blood, smelling of fear and anyone could believe his lies.
Immediately, the men started raining jabs and kicks on me. I even felt a leather belt off and on my back until they pushed me outside. Suddenly there was a great shout into the morning sun as people spilled out of their houses calling their neighbors. For a minute, I was condemned to death for murdering my own beloved and those lights of hope faded from my eyes. I wanted to scream, shout and explain what I had saw yet my voice couldn't make it so I condemned myself too and opened my heart to join my beloved in the other side.
I was tortured beyond imagination and almost set ablaze when a blue Corolla arrived. Yes, it wasn't my time too although I had lossed sense of hope. A man jumped out of the car and came to my rescue. He was my angel, the one the heavens had sent to my rescue as he pleaded with them to hand me over to the police.
I couldn't walk neither talk as my body ached in fear, bitterness and guilt. Yes I was guilty because I was afraid to face him when he came to the house and murdered her. Two men hopped into the car dragging me along as we drove out of the scene. We hadn't covered a mile when the car started jerking almost by a lonely path along the stomach of the community.
The man stepped out to check what was wrong until the other men hoped out. I noticed they were having a dialogue about what to do with me when it hit me, "This is your chance or live to pay for what you didn't do" that minute, it felt like the universe had decided to be on my side as a drip of strength flowed into me.
I slowly scrutinized the path to take then quickly took to my heels. I didn't care to look behind but noticed they didn't bother to chase me. To cut the story short, I escaped to my ex girlfriend's house looking like a mad man but who cares when my life was at stake. God bless her because she took me in, cleaned me up before listening to my story. she gave me three thousand naira which I used to relocate to Bayelsa where my childhood friend stays.
Bayelsa was pretty fair to give me a new live, a new home and beginning. Days turned into months then years until that day, I4th of February, 2017.
That day, I had a blind date somewhere within Rivers State where I had relocated few weeks back. I was late so my proposed date left angrily before I arrived. My memory isn't perfect but I remember wandering around the open park when I noticed someone. Huge and chubby with a broad chest, it was him, the murderer; the man who killed my beloved and set me up for the consequences. That instance, my skin pinched as my emotions boiled viciously. Again, I wished I had a gun when I remembered I was grown and man enough to face my greatest enemy.
He was so happy with a lady twice younger than he was and it whipped my spirit watching him live while an innocent girl who only wanted a better life laid lifeless somewhere six feets in Enugu. News got it that she was laid to rest at her maternal home the next day and I was being hunted by the state police except that they couldn't lay hands on anything about me. For me, I'd say it was fate tolling around me because we met three weeks before her death and I was squatting with her.
I trailed him that night to his house and realized that girl earlier with him was just a concubine, he was a husband and a father of a beautiful girl whose tears drained my spirit till this very minute we're having this conversation but it gave me more reasons why I should end his life because he wasn't just a murderer but a cheat and irresponsible father.
I told a friend who knew about the story so he obliged to follow me to the man's place. Believe me, this friend was born for such moment and life brought him to me. We attacked same time he attacked I and Grace and believe me, he was so swamped to see me again. "Remember me, old friend" I asked with shimmers of revenge in my eyes. He wanted to cry out for help, to scream his agony and fears to the silent streets of Marine Base but stayed like I did the day he murdered my beloved.
His open mouth was gurgling and sputtering saliva as my friend pointed the gun at him. "So you too is afraid of death" my friend giggles. "Yet he smiled while taking her life" I added. Although I had premeditated myself shooting him countlessly but shivered when his little girl started crying. I felt terrified to make the little girl go fatherless and I knew I could change my mind the more I watched her cry so I ordered my friend to shoot which he did thrice.
Maybe I'm a fool for not killing him myself. Maybe am a murderer who's destined to die by my own sins but am happy I did something, something I couldn't do, am glad I avenged the death of my sweet Grace, the only girl who showed me so much love and the world although she wasn't a saint. I still don't know what she shared or did with this man who took her life but still not interested because once upon a time, we either become the Villian or Hero.