My Morning pages

I hope you have an idea about waking every morning feeling like you're on a mission. I hope you make it on your own and get the things you want and desire.

Where I'm from, they barely grow. All they do is hustle for survival thus plotting life whatever way it transcends, forgetting about the one thing our fore fathers fought for in earnest; forgetting about honor yet striving for freedom they already have although refined by the English man who attached possessions and wealth to the thing we call success.

Survival is but a daily routine. It's not about knowing where you're going but about knowing where you are. It's like a child in the arms of a mother, a dog within the four walls of its master's compound and a cat treating humans like its fellow cat; not friendly like the dog.

For so long we've attached our freedom to materialistic things. We've spent years and most of our lives holding on to people we want although they never wanted us. We've clinged to illusional feelings and attachment thereby creating a false world in our own very eyes.

The beauty of life: the pains don't always last. The sun won't always shine while the rain will always cease. I'm only trying to say, "Don't battle with circumstances which barely is about you but around you to express its essence".

I love to write in plain words that might make one lost in ones thoughts. I'd prefer solitude than multitude because silence makes the best part of me. When she's gone, am reasoning. When she's here am fine.

My father once told me to do what I can with what I have at exactly where I am and it sits well with my spirit that my flaws reflect my strength.

Last night ended like a bar fight and I went home as a drunk who's ashamed and alone yet waking this morning tells so much about life itself: Timeless with seasons for us to grow and die.

I woke to imagine how it feels to know you're going to die someday then I realized that dying never teaches anything about life but acceptance even when it isn't acceptable because the only thing that teaches about life is living itself.

I'm not too proud that I cry sometimes. Am not too shy when the moments wakes against me although my blood surges through my veins just as my brain sprouts illusions about the world around me.

They say you never know what one is going through until you go through it and that's the point where my ex girlfriend stays mad at me. She thought am going through the drain until she was drained up. Drained in depression, stuck in her own fears and anxiety that barely exist but in her mind.

Am awake not to do or live differently but to stand and see the world differently as depression leads to suicide, love intertwines with hate and regrets follow suits with sorrows that reminds us of the cross we'll have to carry till the day we answer present to Mr. Death.

Yesterday is gone, tomorrow is in our dairy yet the one thing we have complete control over is the moment, now and the present. So I ask you, will you soak it up in the regrets of yesterdays, waste it all in the pictures of tomorrow or grasp it with all pleasure to make every second from it count?

This is my morning pages and I hope I just spoke to someone because I was only thinking out loud.