Yes, you are not alone on this one. This article is 90% for the ladies and 10% for the guys. Because there are some guys that have no clue on how to go about this proposal thing in a well defined relationship. Most ladies have been in a short term relationship and its already looking like forever, while some are in a long term relationship and hoping he would pop the question already. Follow me as we trash this together.
This beautiful ring can fit perfectly into those fingers, but first you have to get it right.
Ladies
We often hear complaints from our female friends, who are basically worried to death about this whole getting "him to propose".
One of my female friends once confided in me. She was so worried based on these facts;
Her age was running too fast(she was about to clock 35).
The relationship has lasted for 3years and if care wasn't taken it was going to extend to 10.
The love of her life seems to be a off in such matters.
Her African family seem to be on her neck to settle down.
Lastly, all her friends were all married with kids to show for it.
As she laid these facts, there wasn't much to argue. I felt for her as she seemed so depressed and worn out from all the silly thoughts that tend to fill her head.
My response
Out of all her complaints it was only the second fact that made much sense to me. " He seems to be off in such matters ", that means he has other priorities other than marriage. I pulled her together and we made a checklist to be really sure the guy's head was into it before proceeding to acquire knowledge on how to get him to propose.
The checklist
Priority [×]: We discussed on what the guy talks about on daily basis. What his priorities are and what his long term goals were, hoping to find marriage in it. Where are you in his priority list.
[She listed what she felt were his priorities and to her surprise, she realized that He has never mentioned marriage in his long term goals.]
How he has defined the relationship[√]: Now several people in different relationships across the globe have defined their relationship. Either they are in for fun, for the benefits to be derived from the person(visa,money, etc), for sex only, for love which will end up in marriage. A defined relationship is a win for me because the both parties know were they are headed. Without major definition of the relationship, its just like sitting on a merry-go-round.
[She thought deeply and was affirmative that theirs was very much defined, she fell in love with him not because of his looks or money and vice versa]
Beliefs[]: A lot of guys have different attitude towards marriage because of the belief they have about it. Some feel marriage is a prison, where you are stuck with one individual for years. Others feel the right time to marry as a guy is when they have explored a certain number of ladies, both sexually and otherwise. As a lady, the beliefs your guy has towards marriage matters a lot ,that determines his attitude towards his proposal to you.
[At this point she didn't really know the answer to this. So the box was left blank]
At the end of the survey we both realized there was much work to do to get him to propose. Starting from fixing his priorities right, down to getting to know his sincere thoughts about getting married to her.
After the checklist has been crossed I will share with you in the part 2 of this article on WAYS TO GET HIM TO PROPOSE.
Do you think I missed out any criteria to be on the checklist. You can drop on the comment box below.