My sad little story.

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Avatar for Eleonor
3 years ago

I always thought I was a little strange, ever since I was little. I remember my grandmother used to tell me I was a very distant child, that never needed anyone around, in order to have fun. Turning into a teenager didn't really change that because I remember getting my heart broken so many times that loneliness started to feel like a blessing to me.

To be honest, I didn't perceive being alone as a burden. I've always had this feeling of being misunderstood by people or not having things in common with them, so instead of making friends, who would end up judging the way I am, I decided to be solitary because that felt way better and, somehow, felt like putting a shield over my sensitive heart.

source: pinterest

I don't really know if I was born like this or if certain situations that happened in my life made me this way but I can honestly say that spending most of your time with yourself is actually kind of therapeutic. I like to say that I enjoy my moments of solitude because those are the moments when I am my truest self. Because, sometimes, having people around you can actually influence who you are or your actions, which can lead to losing yourself.

I have personally lost myself a couple of times in life, by trying to be someone else, so I can fit in a certain group of people. That was until the ones that loved me brought me back to the right path, by constantly reminding me who I used to be, what I used to love and what my beliefs are.

Besides being a solitude person, I also used to be an overly emotional one. I still am, to a certain extent, but now i'm way better at managing my emotions and not allowing people to take advantage of them. I think this was also one of the reasons why I ended up on my own. Not everybody has the same heart as you do so in order to protect yourself from getting hurt, you sometimes need to learn how to step back and put a limit on your feelings.

Being lonely and being alone are two different things. Being lonely is a feeling of sadness, of missing or a feeling of being incomplete while being alone does not necessarily mean you are also lonely. Being alone might actually improve your relationship with yourself and with others because, sometimes, people need their alone time in order to clean themselves of negative thoughts or emotions, so they don't project them on those that have caused no harm.

People oftenly confuse these two and think that if a person is alone is also lonely but that's not always the case. I think neither of these terms are negative, because I have seen people create wonderful pieces of art from both of them, like write songs that became hits or books that became bestsellers. It's actually all about figuring out how to make the most out of these feelings and see how you can take something positive out of them.

If you do recognise yourself in my article, don't feel bad. Every little thing in this life is temporary and you should just make the best out of everything. I have been through both loneliness and solitude and now I am happy with myself and content that I can still go back to those feelings, from time to time, which actually helps me with my writing.

Try and always see the best in everything, even it it's something that appears to be bad. Never judge anything or anyone because you might be surprised of what hides behind the surface. And if you ever see someone standing somewhere, by themselves, just leave them alone and don't feel sorry for them. They are most likely happy. :)

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3 years ago

Comments

I read your story ELEANOR, and I appreciate that you could stand for yourself and found a way out. I would also like to say that, not every people out there, judges you just because of your few actions, or maybe mistakes anything, I wish that you get friends who are helping, kind, and supporting and I believe your perception of friends will be changed very soon. I would again mention that I really like your story.

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3 years ago