They have their own life too..
Do you love your parents? Of course you do! I say that no matter how bad a parent is you can't always hate them. You may not like them and they may not like you, but that parent - children type of love is always present, even if it is yet to be awakened.
Our parents always want the best for us, they want us to grow up to be good ambassadors of our family, the community and the world in general. They go through the pain of nurturing us till the age when we have a mind of our own, when we are able to make those big decisions that determine the direction towards which the rest of our lives will stir. Still, some of our parents seek to gain control over those life changing decisions despite knowing that we are old enough to live our own life..
We only have life to live and it is very enough if you love it well.. Alot of us are living our parents life even though they have lived theirs already. It is okay to as parents to advice our children on what is right and what is wrong, besides that's one of our duties as parents but some parents still choose to exert their wills on their children, making them do what their minds are not into, thus wasting a portion of their life..
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Let me tell you a little story which infact prompted me to write something on this :
A level 600(final year) medical student in our university just stopped coming to school. Just like that. He is a very sociable and friendly person so his course mates immediately took notice of his absence. They tried calling his phone but he didn't pick any of their calls and them, sensing that something wrong might have happens to him, went to the house he rented off campus. They asked him what the matter was and told them that he never wanted to be a medical doctor. His wanted to be a pilot but his parents forced him to study medicine. That he is tired of living his parents dreams, that he is depressed, that even if he had made it through each and every level that he would not feel fulfilled as a medical doctor. He wasn't satisfied and he feels like something is missing in his life.
His course mates tries to beg him to come and continue, even if it means getting only the degree with no intention of practicing but he refused. They had no option than to leave him alone as he pleases.
What is there to learn about this story? Apart from the fact that the guy here in question made it through every level and didn't fail, he felt like something was missing. Now thing of all the people who tried getting into medical school but weren't opportune and had to take a different route in life. Some people want to become doctors for the passion of it, some want to do it for the prestige that comes with it, others want to do it to gain future favors. All have their reasons to go into whatever field of study they want to. You get my point here right? My point is it doesn't really matter what amount of respect a feild of study comes with or what people think. If your mind is not into it, then go do what your heart cries out for!!
Now what have the parents gain by forcing their son to study what wasn't his passion. After wasting 6 years of his life in medical school while they could just let him become the pilot he wanted to be, they are now disappointed in him, (when it is themselves they should be dissapointed in).
Some of our parents(especially Asian and African parents) want us to become lawyers, doctors, engineers and other "respectable" courses but fail to consider or even listen to what our own interests are. All they are doing it for is to boast and say "my son/daughter is a doctor /lawyer /engineer etc while the son/daughter might be interested in music or something else. If things go wrong, parents would be responsible although some times they fail to admit it.
Let them choose. It's their life not ours.
Thanks for reading.
With this, I will like to end this article with a poem about "children" by Kahlil Gibran.
"Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable."
Kahlil Gibran, author of The Prophet, was born January 6, 1883, in Bsharri, Lebanon.
Some parents need to understand that children also have interests and they have what their abilities can comprehend. Forcing a child to do against his will will eventually bring confusion and regret at the end to the parents. Children have their rights to choose whatever they want as long as they reach that matured age.