@Deeepensiverse
It's Okay To Not Be Okay
Lead image by me. 'It's okay to not be okay' is a sentence that'll be awfully familiar if you watch k-drama, the drama focused on mental health but I'm taking it out of the context of the drama as I'm focusing on talking about your feelings here. I'm here to say it's okay to be not fine. It's me again, I've not published in a while, but I've been reading your articles, I've not just had money to tip your articles, BCH dipped and my little money dipped with it. I was given more duties where I work about 2 weeks ago and as usual, I have trouble balancing two things. I'm definitely a type of person that won't be able to cheat on my partner smoothly😂, I'll get caught. I wanted to take a break here for a few days and it led to my hiatus. The funny thing is I took a break from all my duties since about a week ago and just binge-watched my favorite series. I haven't even read any new book in two weeks( I finally started one yesterday ) my friend took me seriously when I said that, I could be writing an exam in two days but I'll find time to read a chapter or two. Tell me a better healing technique than watching your faves kiss and in love. Nothing can beat that. **I have a question today though.** I was actually so stressed that there was no day I didn't take NSAIDs because of the headache and neck pain I was having but if someone asked me 'Dee, how are you? I automatically say 'fine' **Why do we mostly say fine?** I say fine in place of 'I'm hurting, I have pains that won't just go away, I just want to sleep without thinking of deadlines' I say fine in place of 'I'm frustrated that my phone is giving me issues, it doesn't allow me to maximize my time efficiently' I say fine in place of 'my network is so badddd , especially on my bed🤕🤕, that is so sad, and I think it's only because of my phone because other people using the same network provider as me in my house don't have such issues' It's just crazy how much we hold back and I don't even blame anyone because one of the terrible feeling to have is the feeling that you just overshared. I don't feel that a lot but I've felt that on a few occasions and I guess it made me closed off. It's okay to say how you truly feel when you're asked how you are, it's okay to share with your closest friends. I sometimes automatically say fine because of three other reasons 1) **It might be a routine question**: I've asked people about their well-being because I'm supposed before I get to the point of my call or message, I feel we all do that. Imagine discussing life issues with people who just asked for asking sake. Tough😩. 2) **An off mood**: most times I'm not just in the mood for long conversations, I envision that they'll ask me why I don't feel fine and I'll be expected to actually bare my feelings and I'm not in the mood for all that. I just say fine and everything is fine. 3) **Avoiding being a burden**: Nigerians are crazy, if a Nigerian guy asks 'how are you?' and you say 'I'm not fine', so many thoughts start forming in his head which mostly leads to him thinking you have financial issues and they don't press further because they don't have money to give. I'm sorry if I'm generalizing it but it happens. Some ladies are funny though, they are not always fine and when they ask, it's money issues and they expect the guy to assist them. So I don't always like to give that impression, it's not a cool label. My point is that it's okay to tap out, it's okay not to be okay, and it's okay to take a break. Since I took a break, my headaches became less frequent, the neck pains occurred less and I was happy. You should be willing to talk about your problems to people that want to listen. **NOW, HOW ARE YOU?** I'm willing to listen🤗🤗 I started reading this book yesterday, I've had it for a while, but I wonder why I never started it😩😩😩, it's titled 'the seven husbands of Evelyn Hugo' by Taylor Jenkins. I should write a review soon. You should read it. My sponsors❤ @Aimure , @DanLawan and @Talecharm I appreciate the sponsorship🤗🤗 Thank you for reading🤗🤗 June 27, 2022. ©Deeepensiverse
19 comments
Saying Okay despite of being not okay is to hide our true feelings and emotions.. sometimes it is just okay to hide it than to show it especially to those people who are judgemental..
Yeah, that's why we need to choose who we express our feelings to carefully
Yes.. we should..
Those points you noted ate just it. I say "fine" most time because I don't have strength to start explaining and afterall, he/won't be able to solve the problem 🤷
Honestlyyyyyy, it's sometimes better to not talk about it
Do people really want to listen? I think it takes a certain level of caring to know people close to you are not okay without them saying it. When I sense people are not okay, I ask what is wrong and even if they don't tell me, I am cool with it.
That's another angle, it could seem like a burden to some but I think real friends should be ready to listen
That is if real friends are ready to share.
Yeah. Thank you for renewing your sponsorship boss🤗🤗
This is actually true. Many find it difficult to share whatever they are going through with those close them. They have forgotten that a problem is half solved. I thought you wanted to talk about the Kdrama with this same title to your article 😂😂
😂😂😂, ohhh, you've watched it too yeah?
😂😂😂, ohhh, you've watched it too yeah?
Yeah I have 😂
The truth is that many people ask that question "how are you" not because they really care but because they are just following societal courtesy. The reason I usually answer with fine is because I know most of them won't offer a solution if I tell them my problem. But the good news is that your true friends will be able to see through your charade even when you say you're fine, they can tell something is off
Yeah, I like it when my friends notice that without having to say it
Yeah, It's better when friends notice it without having to say how we feel, makes it feel like they want to listen
Me too, I only says fine to avoid long conversation and sometimes it was only because I am not in the mood to entertain anyone as for sure if I told them that I am not fine, they will ask why and so on. I don't like it 😅. However this time I am really fine, I got enough rest and so my body aches lessen.
That's good, I'm happy you're indeed fine
That statement is actually from K-drama? Wow. I didn't know but it's the truth...it's okay not to be okay. How am I? I need a miracle with so many things to do.