He behaves better without mom. (EN)

With other people he behaves wonderfully, but with you his attitude leaves much to be desired. This problem of your son is not due to others understanding him better than you, but to another reason. It is necessary to know them.

Every day you go through a real ordeal so that he eats, so that he goes to bed, so that he doesn't throw tantrums for any nonsense. It is as if you had to maintain a constant fight with him: he does not obey you, he is capricious and often gets on your nerves in case this will not be enough to make you feel bad, you know that he is a good boy with others.

When you're not in front, he endears himself to everyone because of his stupendous behavior. Let's analyze that reality to remedy it: what reasons does your child have to behave better with others than with you.

Causes of your attitude

In the first place, his attitude is due to the fact that he is only with the others for a while. Everyone tries to please him, especially if they know that you have frequent upsets due to his bad behavior, since then they will try even more to demonstrate their ability to tame him and it is logical that your little one is in his sauce and behaves well.

Secondly, your son does not allow himself to misbehave with others, because he has less trust with them than with you and he is not sure if they will follow him than laughing after disobeying them. With you, however, he has the full assurance that you will continue to love him, whether he behaves badly or whether he behaves well.

You can change things?

Children learn quickly, and yours has realized that if, for example, he doesn't eat or throws himself on the floor crying, you dedicate yourself fully to him, beg him, insist and give him all your attention, which is what that he is looking for. What can you do then, when there is no way to make him see reason?

When he misbehaves, it's best to ignore him. Thus, his bad behavior will not produce any benefit, he will abandon him and you will also get him to externalize the obedient part of him, as he does with others. The counterpart is that whenever he behaves well, you must be very aware of him and treat him with great affection. As he is much more intelligent than his age may seem to us, to obtain this prize that is so rewarding, he will behave less, you will not get on your nerves and you will not scold him so much.

Your situation at home will improve day by day and his behavior with you will match what you have been told he has with others.

If he misbehaves with you, ignore him, and if he obeys you, reward him. In the end he will adopt the attitude that brings the most benefits.

No to bad habits:

• Frequently, the child's bad behavior with his mother (although he behaves perfectly with others) is not due to being capricious or distracting by bothering her, but to inappropriate behavior that she has been adopting in her daily dealings with him. that he doesn't cry, he buys him everything he asks of him and so that he doesn't get scared of the dark, he goes to bed with him, he will calm him down momentarily, but she will be indulging in her whims and inappropriate family habits.

• If this is your case, she stops spoiling your son so much.

For starters, don't buy his every whim or get into his bed with his. If he spends a few unbearable days you will have no choice but to put up with him, until you manage to channel his behavior of him.