What do I do

Asking for a friend but please no insult.

When it comes to love I hate to lie about how I feel or what I want. I know it hurt most guys when I reject their proposal but I have to say the truth even if it hurt. There is nothing that can hurt pass lying to love someone. I will never do that because it personally hurts me also when I lie. Please kindly help me judge this story I'm about to talk about.

I met a guy sometimes ago, we were not dating we were just friends. He later travel out of the country and after 3years he came back. We met when I went for a show a friend invited me to. We were happy like old time,then he poured out his feelings to me. I told him instantly that I'm that I'm not interested. He insisted I give him reasons for that, I told him I am heart and will break his heart, I told him I am quick to anger, I told him I'm not good in love stories. After all I said he said he is still interested in me and he's ready for anything that happened after. I told him even if he's ready to take the risk of dating me I'm still not interested. He begged and begged then I told him I heard him.

We started the relationship, I pretended I'm fine with every bit of it, whenever he tells me 'I love you' I will respond 'okay' , he use to be unhappy when I say okay but he keep it up. He ask me to move in with him so we start living as couples 💑 I told him I'm not interested in such. I know he want me to move in with him so we can be more closer but how can I do that when I don't even have feelings a bit for him. He tried to go by every rules I laid down in the relationship that I want but still I can't even have feelings for him. Some people says women are easy to fall in love but this is not applicable to me because it hard for me to love.

I was pretending for 4months when I got tired of pretending. I started ignoring him, I stop calling him and when he requested to see me I find excuses to ignore him. I even told him I'm fasting for 40days just for me to ignore him. When he call me to come outside of my house to see him, I tell him I'm not home. Because of him I go out at night till 9:30pm just for him not to by chance decide to come knock my door. He text me every day to tell me how much he missed me but I will tell him okay.

One Sunday we accidentally met in church, he decided to see me off home. On our way he was telling me he miss me and want us to discuss. There I told him we should have a break that is he not tired of how things are going between us. He said he is not ready to leave me, he said it is me or no one else and I'm here tired of pretending to love him which he knows so well that have been pretending all along. He told me about his dad's burial and he want me there because he want to introduced me to his family. I told him I won't be there. How will he want to force marriage in when I don't even love him. I believe in 50/50 love not one sided.

Please, I'm totally confused right now. He want to be with me but I don't want to be with him. I told him from the beginning that it won't work out well between us. He said if I back off it will hurt him so much which I have been avoiding. He said he truly love me but here I am dont love him like he do and I also want to be alone.

I need advice on what to do on this and please no insult.