Can't Feel the Presence of Christmas

Hola everyone, are you excited about the upcoming Christmas? maybe a lot of you had already prepared gifts for goddaughters and godsons. Well if you asked me that question then my answer if I am ready for Christmas is No, aside from personal matters there are also factors that hinder me from feeling the soul of this beautiful month cause I am so busy in life. One of the factors is that I am so busy in school that there is supposedly a year-end party for us students, but our organization didn't implement the plan. They have other plans for us that's why we ended up feel jealous to other courses who really enjoyed their year-end party.

Instead of enjoying the days before X-mas break, we are so busy completing and accomplishing our projects and proposals. Literally, there was no word break for us in third year. This is the most challenging part of my life which I need to prioritize my school activities first before myself, I am busy flourishing out chapter 1 to 3 in our thesis cause next year would be our title defense. In addition for that, I also feel stress yesterday since we pass our proposal to our professor. He rejected our proposal a lot of times that's why we keep revising it until he accepted it however it is very costly again. Imagine that I need to contribute for our thesis and then another contribution which drained me financially.

I don't know if you are on my situation, can you feel the same way? I feel like I'm gonna give up but I already traveled this far and giving up will just waste all my efforts and sacrifices, the only thing that motivates me to move on is a positive thinking that after all of this, I can now surpass 3rd year and move into 4th year which only attending 0JT and run papers for graduation. I hope the law of attraction will possess me and make those wishes come true.

Another factor is lack of money, who would feel weak once they have no money in their pockets? Well, I am, literally, I have no money in my pocket, it got drained due to endless payments in school. No matter how I grind I feel like my money got wasted for nothing, I really miss those days when I earned a lot and manage to pay for all necessary things but right now I feel like earning cents is hard as looking for unique stones in the seashore. 2022 is really not for me, I experience a lot of downs and my feeling is also what happened on market, it's still bloody and as of now it became more bloody. What a pleasant gift for all of us.

Despite all negativities happened to me still I am hoping for a merry Christmas, just sad to say that what I feel affects my yearly routine to accomplish 9 days of simbang gabi, maybe due to lack of interest and without companion, it leads to 2 days absence in Misa de Gallo. Maybe, tomorrow I'll attend, a friend of mine invited me to join them at night mass but I prefer to attend dawn mass cause I feel it'sbetter.