It's been a year since he left us

June 8,2022

Last year at the exact day ,we recieved a bad news ,our grandfather passed away ,it was a heartbreaking news for us,he was the only grandparent we had,our grandparents of my father side was already in hands of our creature and our grandmother in my mother side as well.

It was one of the painful days we had ,knowing that he is still strong at his age he was 79years old anyway that time.I can't believed that he end his life.My grandfather was a victim of depression,he end his life by putting a knot in his neck.I can't believed that an old man can do that ,he was so consious for his health ,he never eaten pork ,chicken because of his highblood pressure he always said that he needs to take care of his self coz he wanted to stay for a long time in this world but then it was happened to him.

We, his family can't believed that he did it to himself.His children ,my mother together with his siblings went to my grandfathers place when they learned that papa was passed away and someone told them what happend to papa.

June 6 ,papa's place experienced floods because of the non stop of rain poured in their area,since their house was near at creek ,the barangay staff evacuate papa to the safe place ,he was alone at home because his wife(2nd wife)was at work as well as his two kids ,so he was alone at home ,he felt nervous when he saw the flood outside their house.After that ,according to someone they scolded papa(his 2nd family)coz he was able to poop in his shorts and maybe thats one of his reasons why he did that ,maybe he felt he was useless ,we don't know what comes from the mouth of his family.As we all know as a senior citizen they easily get hurt by words we thrown from them ,they are so sensitive.

They are all working and when his wife came home from work ,he saw papa with no life at all,papa end his life.

Right now ,I can't type my words correctly coz I remember him ,I can't hold my tears honestly,he was planning before to go home at my parents place at June 13 to celebrate the feast of Saint Anthony de Padua but it was not happened because he left us at june 8.

Who is papa Canor as father?

Nicanor is his real name and mostly the people around him called canor,according to my mother papa was a kind of a strict father but he was doing his best to feed his 6 children and sent them to school.Most of them finished the highschool because papa canor was working as a company driver before.He was a strict but he was doing it because he wanted to descipline them.Actually ,they are the first who had a television in their place before according to my mother.

Papa canor's wife my grandmother died when I was 4 months old because of breast cancer ,I did'nt see my grandmother.After a year he found a girl who had already a kid but don't have a husband ,they married and they had 2kids.One of my auntie felt so sad of papa's desicion ,naglayas yung auntie ko for more than a year.Even if he was have a second family ,he brought his youngest child in their place.

When his two kids from his second wife was studying in college ,he never stop working to sustain the needs of his two kids .Since he was old and already retired from being a company driver ,he works as a pedicab driver in the city.Even if he was old he works hard for his family.All his hardwork was paid off ,his two kids finished college and the eldest was already an engineer and his second child was an office staff.

A strict but a loving father indeed!

Who is papa canor as a grandfather?

4-5times in a year that papa will visits us and everytime he was at home he always had something for his grandchildren.He was keeping those old clothes from his two kids and gave it to us.

When I gave birth to my eldest son ,my auntie told him that I was in one of the hospital in the city where he was living with his second family,then I was surprised when I saw him coming to the room where I was staying .I was aking on how he knows that I was in the hospital ,he said my auntie his daughter told him and he wanted to give me some money ,he handed me 2500 pesos or $50.I don't want to accept it coz I know that he needed it for his medicine but he said that I needed it most.

He may not so sweet like the other grandparents showed like keeps hugging ,or kiss us everytime he was with us but he showed his love and care by giving what he thinks that we need.

He may not with us now but his memories remains in our heart.

I asked your prayer for the peace of his souls,as we all know suicide is a sin ,praying that he was in already in hands of our creature now🙏

Thank you for time,God bless