The Comedy Rumble : The Chase.

Greetings To You...

Welcome To My Blog Once Again!

So guys this is the last week of this contest and I am hoping to read your entries too. The link to the parent post is located at the bottom of this article, endeavor to join. I need to laugh out all the stress... it hasn't been easy...phew!

Ever since I came back from school, to my uncle's house I felt great because I love my privacy a lot. I do a lot of shits and I feel comfy with it. My uncle traveled for a long time and it is just me at home doing me.

You for certain know what a house that has been void for a while will look like... Yea am sure you catch that! Everything was sparkling clean ever since I got back there...I am sure you do not want to stay where cobwebs are lingering around and building connections here and there.

It took me almost three days to finish up everything including sorting dirty wear and trashing a few away. After that, I decided to make tomato stew with beef which I kept inside the refrigerator intending to dish out the quantity I would want to use periodically.

Normally, the trash can for the house is situated at the back of the door in the kitchen but because I know that leaving it inside would cause a stench circulating throughout the whole house, I took it to the corridor for ventilation and to also prevent the case of excess insects and rodents roaming inside the trash can. Days passed and then one very day I heard a noise inside the kitchen cabinet where I packed foodstuffs and other provisions.

[1] Firstly, I am the only one at home. What on earth is making some cracking noise there?
I was scared and curious.

[2] Secondly, I hate being startled by unnecessary things, it makes me feel less comfortable.

I was already suspecting what it is but I do not want to make assumptions yet but my mind was crossed. And then just as I assumed, I saw one tiny little creature crawling its way to the plates in the dishwasher. I stood still watching like status to avoid making noise to distract it. It used its pointed mouth to scrape off leftover meals on the plate. I was pissed because you see that creature, I can't live with it at all.

• The chase just began...

I had an itch on my back with an attempt to scratch it, I made noise and it ran off following a creepy hole at the side of the table where I placed my gas cooker, ever since then it's been a chase. Can you imagine me creeping inside my own house just because of a rat?? Sometimes I even screamed at the top of my voice if anything of sort passed in a flash only to realize it was just my imagination lmao.

This rodent is driving me cray cray!! Ugh!!

This happened almost every night....you know the one that made me laugh so hard during reminiscing.
I had just come back from the market and I was like maybe I should cook this tomorrow morning. So I dropped the food items I bought precisely vegetable soup ingredients. One of the items is crayfish, this item is used for cooking any soup or stew. Those in an African setting would understand better.

And I went to shower before I came back. I saw holes in the nylon bag that looked rough showing signs of attack haha. It was that little thief of a rodent, I was slightly pissed and unfortunately, it jumped out and I began chasing it. I picked up the broom intending to hit it so hard that I would hear it squeak before dying. I was wrong. I didn't catch it, rather I winded up hitting my head against the wall because it was pretty dark lol. I was literally pacing to and fro, murmuring, cursing, and lamenting the evil things I would do to that good-for-nothing rodent.

All the time, I kept hiding things safely to avoid this rodent tampering with them...sometimes it slipped out of my mind, and later on I decided to get rat poison, kill and dry, rat gum, and so forth. Oh! getting the rat poison was entirely a joke hehe...why was it a joke you ask?

I have been promising myself that I would definitely purchase this stuff but hmm I wasn't serious about it. I would go to the market and forget to get this item. I swore that I would get it until one very day the rodent went to eat my special bread. It was etched with nuts, breadfruits, and coconut, which I bought for about $2 and 50 cents. You know those stories when Lassa fever came out about rats, it was trendy here in Nigeria. The thoughts of me contacting that made me trash the bread, gosh I was bitter.

I guess it was due to stress that I kept forgetting about this stuff. I was in my cousin's store when an elderly man selling those things passed, am like yeah, this is my opportunity...
Quickly I beckoned on him to stop which he did and after a few interactions and inquiries, he suggested the rat gum would serve me better rather than the rat poison(because in this case if the rat eats it and dies somewhere it would have a bad odor as that of a dead body and no c'mon I can't begin looking for it). I was glad and excited I bought rat gum for just a rat, precisely tiny ones haha.

I went home and placed the rat gum at its usual hideous path and for over a day plus it hasn't caught it. Surprisingly, it ate the biscuit trap I set close to the rat gum and dodged it. I raised my eyebrow in disdain and disappointment. I went back to the sitting room to eat the meal I prepared one night and after eating and resting, in my resting time, I took my phone to check out a few things and complete my tasks. Sitting and all curled up on the couch, I left remnants of the bread I bought on the plates because I was fed up.

I was sitting still and quiet in the dark when I heard some unclear movements beneath the table I sat at earlier. Immediately I pointed my phone's torchlight at the area and I saw it run away. I went into the kitchen and brought out the rat gum I kept there. I placed the rat gum on the bottom of the table. And put some bread crumbs by the side of the rat gum. This time it was inside but by the side of it. In a few minutes, the aroma of the breadcrumb lured the rodent towards the trap. Instead of the rodent entering the trap and eating the bread crumbs, it stood at the side and pinched out a little of the breadcrumb and was eating it.

When I flashed my phone torch lights, I saw the rodent hiding by the side of the table. When I turned off the light it ran off. I played much smarter this time. So I took the breadcrumb and placed it in the middle of the rat's gum. So obviously when it comes it will certainly have to get inside the trap before it gets to the bread crumbs. And it did!

I would allow you to watch the video below to witness me saying goodbye to this chase...hahaha.

And that was how the reign of this tiny little rodent ended, he was laid to rest inside a nylon bag and trashed alongside heaps of dirt.
May his death bring peace to me phew! ... Hehe

Thanks for stopping by!🦋

This is my second entry to the Comedy Open Miccontest and I am inviting  @Talecharm to participate too, I hope you enjoyed reading.

Posted Here
Header Image From Pixabay
YouTube Link From My Channel.
(Ps: the video is mine recorded with my phone.)