The moment my eyes met with hers. I saw pain through her eyes. I saw anger and a lot of questions. She was just starring at me not saying anything. She later passed and invited herself in. I did nt say anything. I was just starring at her. And an album she was carrying. She was carrying one photo with her other hand. She put the photo in front of me. Still not saying anything. It was a photo of a girl. A very beautiful girl. But I did not know what was my connection with her. Why is she giving me this photo. She later put on an album and opened every page one by one. There a lot Only her- The girl. She looked at me as if she was looking for answers. At that moment; I realised the girl must have something huge that she knows. I tried talking but she stopped me. She spoke. She was not like yesterday. Its like something had changed about her. She was so cold. "So are you going to tell me where is she.? I saw her photos from that file you had yesterday. Just tell me where is she". I was still lost. Until she mentioned the file. But how do I tell her that my mom is the one who used to kidnap and pimp lil kids. How do I tell her that I suspect that the man I love is also involved. She won't believe me. But do I blame her. I would nt too. " am still waiting" that was her again. Her voice was a little sharp this time. She is suspecting me but how could she. I am a mother for God sake. But so was Siphokazi. She tried speaking again. I have to stop her. Otherwise I will end up looking more guilty. "I dont know her. I have never met her and I dont know where she is." I managed to say that. I wanted to carry on and apologised for her loss. But than I thought that will be too forward of me. Way forward. So I left it at that. I looked at her. And she was trying so hard not to blink. She had tears in her eyes. Although she did nt want me to see them but I could. "So you are going around with my sister's photo yet you dont know her and you dont know where she is.? That is weird dont you think?" Okay I understand her grief but she was getting on my nerves. The girl was starting to piss me off. " I dont know what you are insinuating. But I dont know your sister. I got that file while I was searching for my daughter. She was kidnapped too. But because I stood up and did nt go around accusing people i managed to bring her back at home. Safe. So please can I get back to work." As I was saying that I was already busy typing in my computer. And the girl stood there for like 3minutes before leaving. She left and came back while she was already on the door. She put a photo on my Keyboard and said: " you can look at it. While you are busy working. Maybe it will help ease your conscious. My mom suffered a stroke that left her in bed. My Dad is drinking everyday. It was too much for them. Too much that they had to lose themselves. And I am still taking Depression Medication. I can't even begin to think what really happened to her. I hope you will find it in your heart, and tell me the truth about what happened to my sister" she dropped the picture and left. I was about to say something. I wanted to apologise. I wanted to hold her and hug her. Damn you Siphokazi. Even in Hell you still managed to ruin my life. When will it be over. When? And now I am here; being crucified for your sims. I have never kidnapped any kid. Lord I will never do such. I still wonder out of all woman why it had to be you. Why did you give birth to me. And than Mthunzi. He has been nothing but loving but there is a lot of question marks about him and his life. He is just living in this cage and does not want anyone in. Mthunzi can be a monster. I have seen that in him but I still dont think that he is involved in all this. My man just love kids. He will never hurt them. But than I can't forget what Cleo said. And as much as I dont believe her but I have seen how Mthunzi has changed. And that phone call. And why is he having this file from the first place. I may never know. That day I did nt do anything at work. My mind was miles away. I could not help but think of all those girls. I went to boardroom and sat down to check that file. There were a lot of photos. And I saw this girl's photo too. She was young. Maybe they dont have a recent photo. She looked much grown in these photos from Mthunzi's file. Every photo was written a name of a camera man. His phone number and a Date and Time. I checked them. Maybe I might get something from this information. I picked up everything and went to search for this girl. I need her to do this. I went to a Rest room and she was not there. They told she had already left and went underground. I was knocking off at 4pm and she was knocking off at 6pm. But I was so sure I will wait for this 2 hours. She is the perfect candidate to help me. She has a motive. She is looking for a loved one. So that is a push enough. She came back at exactly 5:30. And was covered in coal. She saw me. She just looked at me and passed. I let her. She went on to take a shower and came back.
I was still waiting for her and she looked more puzzled to see that I was still waiting. She came to me. And ask if I wanted to tell her something. "Not here" I answered while checking if there was anyone listening to us. "Okay let's go to my place. My mom is sick in bed and asleep. My dad is probably out looking for alcohol." She said that while she was leading me to her car. What she said about her father made me to miss Babo. He was drinking a lot too. As if there was something troubling him. He was not himself. And when I moved in with him he stopped drinking. He became a different person. A person I will never forget. He gave me love. Answers, advice and mostly wisdom. He made me to believe in myself and I can't help but cry when I think that I did nt get time to thank him for everything. I did nt realise that I was already crying. I only noticed when that girl handed me a box of tissue. We were already in her car. I took 2 and apologised. She did nt even ask why I was crying. I was not gonna tell her anyway. So I liked that. We drove to her place. It was not far. Just 12 km from work. She told me her name was Zizipho. And her sister was Samukelo. We went inside her house and yes she was right nobody was home. I could nt help but noticed that the kettle had a big chain and a lock. Almost every appliances were chained and locked. Even the fridge had a big padlock. I did nt ask why but my eyes were wondering around the house. "He steals anything and sell for alcohol" Zizipho said. " My father, he steals. I am not so sure whether its alcohol only or there is more. He is different." She paused. She went to this other room am sure she was going to check her mom. I looked around the house. It was a normal house. There a lot of photos on a foto frame that was hanging there. The whole family I guess. Zizipho was there too and so is her father and her sister. They all looked happy. There was another one. A child; I think it was her graduation date. A 4/5 year old girl. Siphokazi was there handing her a certificate. I took that picture down and looked closer at it. This cannot be Zizipho's missing sister. Zizipho came back while I was still holding that photo. "That was me on my graduation Day" she came and took the photo away from me. She looked at it and kept brushing it as if she was trying to remember something. I let her be. She went on and continued. "She has been a great help to us. Even when Samu went missing; she was there for us till the day she died." She paused. I am so sure she is not talking about Siphokazi. That woman was a conniving, cruel and selfish being I have ever know. Let me ask who is she talking about. Before I could do, Zizipho was already talking. "She died a terrible death. Despite every good thing she once did to her community; some people chose to forget that" she paused. And wiped her face. I saw tears escaping through her eyes. She was crying. Am not sure whether she was crying for Siphokazi or she was missing her sister. "How did she die?" I asked. She did nt answer same time. And than we heard a door opening. His Dad came In. He was drunk. Could nt even walk straight. It took him almost 10minutes to walk from a door to the couch where he finally went and threw himself in. He fell asleep instant. And was snoring like a horse. I could not help but study him. He looked like he was living a great life before life took everything from him. Before Siphokazi took away his daughter. He had a body of a businessman. And with just a suit and tie and of course some Bubble bath and scrub. He can be mistaken for notorious business man. I wonder if Siphokazi really thought of all the pain and misery she was causing these parents. Considering that she was a mother herself. But than she did not care about her kids. Well she did not care about me. Maybe I was just a reminder of something bad that once happened to her. The way she hated me. She hated me till the end. Even when she was dying, she just hated me. A tear escaped my eyes again. "Its rude to stare" I was disturbed by Zizipho. She handed me a tissue. "I am sorry, he reminds me of Babo- My uncle" I managed to say that. "He was a drunk too?" Zizipho asked. "no. He had a lot going on. And he opted to alcohol for comfort" I told her. "but thats the same. He was a drunkard. A coward. Could nt deal with his problems and opted for an easy way out." Zizipho said without even looking at me. I was mad. I hate judgemental people. Especial the ones who think they know all while they dont. Zizipho was throwing insults to my Uncle. A very Good Uncle. While few minutes earlier she was protecting Siphokazi- a snake. " I will like to believe that u are referring to your Dad. Coz my Uncle was no coward and no drunkard. (I paused and stood up to stand next to her. She was busy fixing a sandwiches) you know ever since I came here; ever since I met you I have realised that you are a very bad judge when it comes to people's charectors" She turned to face me.
She looked at me as she was shocked. She did nt expect that from me. Maybe she thought I was just going to accept every blows that she was throwing my way. I did nt say anything either. I kept looking around the house. His father's snores were like a music, just making a right sound at the right time. It gave me time to think. It gave me time to go back. And think what would life be If I was raised by both Parents. What would life be; if I stayed with Morgan. If Siphokazi did not came and fetch me. What would life be if I did not meet Mthunzi. I believe Mthunzi and Siphokazi has been a source of my Problems. I thought with Siphokazi gone life would be different. I thought I will have what I have always wanted. A perfect family. Mthunzi, the kids and I. But than I can feel all that slipping away. I was disturbed by Zizipho. "I should just give you a whole box. Damn you can cry." She said that as she was handing me another tissue. I have been crying again. I took it and did nt comment about her silly joke or whatever that was. She told me to come and sit down. We had sandwiches and juice. Well I had coffee. She told me to suit myself. And I did. I have known Zizipho for 3seconds if you could say that. But I have noticed that she has a damn attitude. I will never stand being next to her for long. Or else I will just slap her. She was eating her sandwich as if her life depends on it. She was actual having a moment with it. I watched her. I must say I like what she was doing. Reminding me of someone. I dont know who though. But what she was doing looked familiar. "You are smiling. Gosh I swear you are complicated; first minute you are crying, the next you are smiling. Mhm. I wish to be you" she said that while carrying on with her food. I did nt say anything. We had our food and headed to her bedroom as soon as we were done. She took out an album and laid it there. "I am sure this is the reason you waited for me for 3hours". She said looking at me with those eyes with a lot of questions. " 2hours" I said correcting her. "Well its the same to me. 2 or 3 hours whatever it is. So tell me, why were you waiting for me." I did nt say anything. I took out my file; well Mthunzi's file and lay it down there. She took all the photos going through them one by one. And took more minutes on her sister's photo. "She looked much older here. Much older than the day she disappeared. She looks health. But sad." She commented. And already tears were streaming down her face. I stood up and went to take a whole box of tissue and put it there. We might need more than a box. She took one and thanked me. I did nt say anything. I have learnt to observe, observe and reserve my comment. It always helps. People speak a lot when you are quite. They can tell you their plans, their Sins, their love life and infidelity without you asking them. It has always worked for me. So I was planning on doing the same with Zizipho. She does not think before talking. She just do the talk. Not even paying attention if she is hurting anyone in a process. The likes of her are the most honest beings. I have learnt that through my struggle life. "How did you manage to find your daughter?" She asked. I have totally forgotten about that. Yes Cleo was once missing but I dont think Siphokazi was involved. I only told Zizipho that because she was suspecting me of being the one who was stealing innocent kids. "Its a long story. Besides her story was different from this. She was stolen by her father's ex girlfriend. Who was trying to hurt us" She was shocked. And so sincere. "I am sorry. Women are sick out there. How could you do that to a fellow woman" She asked that as if she was expecting a response from me. I looked away. I took one photo and looked at it. I wanted to ignore her. I wanted to hear what she was thinking. I wanted to get into her mind and know what she was thinking before she could say it. "Do you think she is still alive? My sister; Samukelo; do you think she is alive?" She asked as if she wanted a little hope from me. "You may never know. But I am willing to help you figure that out. I believe you might help me somewhere." I said. "Help you how? I can't even help my dying mother. Or my drunk dad. How can I help you?" She asked raising her shoulders and stretching her hands. She reminded me of Cleo there. My daughter is a character. She used her hands mostly when she talk. Mthunzi has always reprimanded her. Saying she will be a serial liar. Most of them uses hands. I was puzzled coz he is a serial liar and he doesn't use his hands. "You are laughing again. Do u mind sharing?" Zizipho asked. "No. U just reminded me of my daughter. She acts like you. She even eats like you. Wow. You too have a lot in common. U should meet her." I paused after saying that. I have said more than enough. I have said a lot actual. I have to go. Its getting late. I picked my file and started picking up photos. "I have to go. Its getting late." I told Zizipho. "No. wait" She said that holding my arm. I did nt say anything I just looked at her hand. The one that was holding my arm. She was shaking. I went on and put my hand over hers. I felt sorry for her. I wanted to help her. I have to help her. I feel responsible somehow. She looked at me and smile. She gave me an album and more photos of hers and her sister. And lead me to the door. Still holding my arm. I followed her. And we went out. We were silent on the way home. There is something about the way she touched me. The look on her eyes when she was holding me. There is something that I felt. I dont know what but there is something. She stopped at the gate. I was about to go out when she asked. "You said you will help me. Because you believed I will help you also. But you did nt say what kind of help you wanted." What she was saying felt like a statement. But I knew she was expecting an answer. So I went on and gave her one. "Closure. You will help me find Closure. Goodnight. And thanks for the ride." I walked out and did nt give her a chance to say something. She walked out and left her door opened. Running after me. "Wait" she was shouting. I stopped. "Go home Zizipho. We still have a lot of time. Goodnight" I left her there standing. I dont know what time did she leave. But she was gone after few minutes. I went in kissed my kids and headed to bed. Jacqui was the Best. She knew I had a lot and she did nt bother interrogating me. I fell asleep. Hoping tomorrow will be much better than Today or Yesterday. Mthunzi never called. And I did not either. It was what it was. No need denying it. We were over. Whatever that we were sharing was gone. Gone with the lies. The secrets. The scheming and all the shit he put me through. And to make it worse after everything.. I still love him. A lot.
Haba sis.. very good..