To Clara

So, I told someone she is a liability in her relationship and that is why her boyfriend isn't interested in marriage.

I am sharing because ladies tend to be too relaxed most times in a relationship.

Note: Men are usually generous at the beginning of a relationship as they tend to treat you like a queen and bring out the best in you.

Now, this lady's boyfriend, Dan (fictional name) is close to his 40s, an entrepreneur, with his own house, 3 good cars, always using the latest iPhones and gadgets.

He started dating Clara (fictional name) at age 23, that was six years ago, the iPhone she is currently using he got it for her 3 years ago and keeps promising to change her phone over the past years and she hasn't changed it herself, because despite the fact that she earns a living, she is bad at managing money.

Clara simply likes depending on Dan for everything. She keeps trying to belong, buying clothes and shoes that are way above her means, just to keep up with some so called "big girls", worst of it all, she always brags about this boyfriend of hers, Dan this, Dan that!

She will always ask for money and spend it on stupid things trying to keep up with so called friends that are actually saving and planning their own lives; bragging about Dan and her long term relationship like it's an award or a trophy?

She keeps disturbing Dan for everything even the most little of things and she gives him nothing to hold onto, in return just words that can't even hold water. She is a good liar, who is manipulative, disrespectful, and she can't cook a good meal.

Babe, seriously?

Recently, she does most of the calling, he is constantly complaining about her attitudes and even tells her to pay back his money when she borrows even a little. Nobody is putting in 100% anymore, not even her.

Let's be realistic, Dan literally stopped spending too much on her because he has seen it all and he can't plan a future on words. He needs assurance from Clara's end too. He loves her and needs her to be the best version of herself. He has probably figured it out that he is just a show off to her and obviously her money bag.

No love-hate sister but,

Please, let him go!... he has made up his mind not to marry you, he doesn't want to hurt you, so he stopped spending VALUABLE cash on you. Should incase you go, he won't feel that bothered.

Let go! go work on yourself, evaluate your character and personal goals, and be the real you, stop the 'fakeness'. Forget your friends' opinions, stop looking for social validation, and come out as the broke you ready to make a DIFFERENCE. Love the real you, no one can love you better, except Jesus.

If Dan is the one, he would support you all the way on this journey of a great transformation

Love yourself first before looking for love out there. Learn to take care of yourself, it's hard but it will make you stronger and wiser.

To all Clara's out there, self validation is all you need.