Developing the child's sentiments

    Teach values to your children:

It becomes incumbent upon us, as parents, to implant noble manners within our children, and bring them up in accordance with these manners. We should instruct them all the time and be good examples for them to follow. But even then, there is no way to implant those virtues to be a part of our children's conduct unless they are put into practice.

    Honesty

A parent should be fully truthful with his children: he has to answer all their questions simply and truthfully. When watching a scene on TV, clarify to your children the consequences of deception, cheating and stealing.

    Bravery

Praise your children for any attempt revealing praiseworthy enterprise or courage, and reward the least initiative to bravery taken by anyone of them, even if it appears during the first years (of childhood).

Demonstrate bravery in front of your children, and talk a lot about it, and make your personality a model for them to imitate. It is good to tell your children about the difficulties you have faced throughout your life, but not boastfully in so much as honestly in a way that gives them the impression that even older people face.

    Good treatment

Teach them that had people adopted this principle, there would have been neither disputes nor oppression, neither conflict nor quarrels between them.

Teach them how to deal with people humbly and according to the basis of forbearance and self-control; that to behave humbly indicates power rather than humiliation. Furthermore, we should be lenient in all matters both quietness and self-control are among the supreme virtues. Teach them, from their early childhood, that good treatment is practical and real.

If your child makes noise in front of you, or raises his voice while asking you for anything pressingly, tell him to keep quiet first, and beware of yielding to his anger. Control yourself, and keep quiet. Then, take him somewhere and make him sit on a chair. If you are convinced that his anger has calmed down, then, give him the thing he asked for, while telling him that it is good treatment and peacefulness, and not noise which helped him get what he wanted, and that noise brings about no good, and has no benefit.

    Independence

Teach your children that it is due upon a man to work earnestly Instruct them that children have to work seriously and energetically in their study in order to depend on themselves when they grow up and thus, be able to eat from the labor of their own hands. Be a good example for others to follow, and give them the impression that you always seek to be better and higher not only in your work, but also in all affairs of life.

Scrutinize your children and acknowledge their talents, and help them detect their own selves. There is a fact admitted by the educators, "The children are not elastic dough which we could molded in any way we will." It is more correct to say that they are "but seedlings", which have their characteristic properties: we cannot transform the seed of an oak tree into a pear tree, but we have to endeavor to help each tree grow according to its own properties.

Let your children break their own records instead of comparing themselves with others. For example, encourage them to get a higher rank in their school year and be better than their achievement the year before.

Praise every effort they exert, and teach them to say whenever they fail to do a thing: "I am unable to do such and such; but I can do such and such."

Make suggestions to your children more than commands as much as you can, and ask whether they need your help, but do not impose your help.

Try to make fewer decisions and give more encouragement to your children to help their talents blossom. Do not tell your child, at first, what to do, but let him know by himself what to do, and remind him of what he could do.

Ask your child about his greatest point of weakness, and about his biggest problem. Help him know that for every matter that worries him, there is a certain solution. -   Moderateness and temperance: Teach your children to be moderate in everything legal as regards food, drink, speech, sport, and pocket money. Teach them to know the limits of the body and mind, and how to avoid extremism and imbalance.

    Tell them the following:

-     Excess in eating makes you fatter.

-     Excess in playing may exhaust you and tire your body.

-     Excess in watching TV may hinder you from study, let alone its other negative effects.

-     Allow your children to spend their money by themselves.

-     Encourage your children to give, even a small percentage of their money to the poor, needy and indigent.

    Chastity and Sincerity

Let the youth remember that the most precious wedding gift is chastity prior and concomitant to marriage, along with sincerity to the spouse afterwards.

Although some fathers during their youth were not chaste, they now truly aspire and sincerely wish that their children would be saved from immorality in this age of the AIDS epidemic.

So, parents should be a good model of chastity for their children, and should not forget to clarify that in chastity, there is happiness for those who have maintained their purity and controlled their desires until they got married.

Of a surety, your comments on what they see in TV programs and serials or read in books and articles should be studied, placing emphasis, without ostentation, on the beauty of modesty.

The rein of chastity is not intended to destroy man's freedom, as alleged by those who follow their whims. Nay! It is rather a tool to benefit from, and direct it for the good of people. In the absence of the rein of chastity, it is, most likely, that the instinct which is lurking in the human depths, may be unleashed at any moment until it ruins him and others along with him.

    Fulfillment of Commitment

Assure yourself as well as others, that you always fulfill your promise and thus, are reliable. If you like to be worthy of others' confidence, start with the simplest things: be exact in your statements: tell a friend, for instance, that you would visit him at 7 pm, instead of the unspecified statement that you would pay him a visit in the evening.

Tell your child that you would go no matter how busy you are because you want to be with him while delivering his speech in the morning at school; and thus, the children would keep their promises.

    Respect

If we want to make our children respect others, we should first treat them with respect, and make them feel that they are respected.

Unfortunately, a lot of fathers treat their children as objects and not people, under the pretext that as long as the young are still young, let them remain young. A father may say, for instance, "I told you to do such and such a thing; and I am your father: do you understand?" Teach your child that respect is to behave politely, talk gently.

    Affection

It is due on you, O father, to clarify to your child that your displeasure with his bad manners does not affect your love for him. Assure your children, again and again, and on every occasion, that you love them all unconditionally. But this should not prevent you from punishing anyone of them who deviates (from the right course), neglects (his duties) and harms others, keeping in mind that punishing him is intended to depreciate his disgraceful act but not to degrade his person or indicate that you do not love him.

    Favoring Others over Oneself (Altruism)

Teach them to feel the others' needs and that real happiness lies in making others happy.

    Graciousness

Remind your children, from time to time, that the gentle well-mannered polite person is closer to people's hearts and more ready to obtain their affection and love.

Try to be affectionate and gracious with everyone including your children, and say often the phrases of refinement like "Thank you", "I beg your pardon", and so on. Seek the aid of graciousness in all your behavior.

    Justice

Be just between your children so that they would feel they are equal in all things: none of them should be rewarded to the exclusion of another, nor should anyone be punished apart from another.

In sum, it is not enough to plant those seeds in the hearts of your children once in their lifetime: on the contrary, you have to look after those plants within your children in order that they would grow as they grow, and adhere to them throughout their life, perchance anyone of them would become a good righteous child causing his parents to be happy.