Obsessing about what others will think about me is a chronic problem. Now people are more sensitive for too many things, the looks, the figure, the dress, the makeup, the boyfriend and so many others. Girls are more concerned about these things as it is hard wired to our mind and the expectation of the society. We look at the mirror so many times to see whether we are looking fine, whether our dress is suiting us, am I looking fat. And believe me it makes us feel miserable to maintain ourselves keeping in mind that others should always think well about us. But whatever you do you will always find someone who will give that look or say something which will make you feel bad. I also one day thought that enough is enough and now I should live life my way rather than bothering about what others will think about me.
So what I did was this:
The first step is to know where you are now and where you want to reach. Use mindfulness to paying attention to what your thoughts are about yourself. If you feel you are too obsessed about what others think about you then try to understand where that thought is coming from. Is it some sort of lack of confidence about yourself or are you trying to be someone who you are not, or you want to show off or you want to present a cute innocent girl image. Once you understand what your position is about yourself then only you will be to take corrective measures.
The next step will be to control your emotions. Slowly start to feel that you are unique and you should stay that way. People should love your uniqueness and not what you are trying to show to the world. Don’t hesitate to speak up unambiguously. When we try to be over diplomatic in our words that means we are not being true to ourselves and we are being image conscious. Understand the fact that how much you try you cannot make everyone happy. Be in control of your emotions when others are trying to antagonize you, this is a good sign that you are being yourself.
Try to challenge your core belief. Some days go to your office without make up id previously you used to put it on. Let others react in whatever way they want, tell them you are comfortable this way. Wear the types of dresses which you used to avoid thinking what others will think about you. Tell them you are comfortable with it. Put up a face of confidence in yourself when you are speaking to someone or when you are walking. Think that you do not care now what others are thinking about you. Accept that people will judge you. If they are judging you through their eyes or expressions then try to do it even more. Make then uncomfortable rather than you being uncomfortable.
This will slowly help you to let go of whatever latent insecurities you had about yourself. Make it a point do just the opposite of what your insecurities made you do. Don’t think about the past and future but keep yourself in the present. Make it your gospel that you want to make the best use of now in whatever way you want. Forget what you were in the past, consider it as a closed chapter of your life and then move ahead. Don’t fear about the consequences in the future, for nobody knows the future. Try to be the original you.
Always remember that an original flower only gives scent and not a paper made flower.
