Know who your friend is

Majority of us do not know who truly our friend is. We have called a lot of people friends and in the real sense they are not fit to be called our friends. It is because we have abused the word friendship a lot that many of us are getting hurt. Have you ever been betrayed by one which you called your friend before? Oh! and you are crying, saying "and she was my friend or he was my friend, i didn't expect this from her or i didn't expect this from him". Well, maybe he or she was never your friend, maybe you thought wrong. Always take note of the purpose or reasons why people are in your life. We have different classification of friendship. There are different level as to which you place your friend, if you miss it, then you are sure to tell stories that touch. I will be discussing some of the classification of friendship i know in the subsequent paragraphs.

Constituent

This classification include those that can help you achieve your goal. Examples of constituents are your colleagues at work or your course mates. One thing you should take note is, whether it is at work or in school, you are all there to achieve a set goal. Now, let us take the example one after the other. While you are in school, the major goal is to graduate, but you will agree with me that it is not an easy task. You cannot work or walk on your own. There are times they will give you a group work in school and you need to relate with others in your group. The fact that you have now started relating with them does not automatically make all of them your friends that you should your deep secret with. Do you need them? yes. Are they your friends? Well, they are your constituents that you have to work with to achieve your goal, so you know the category they belong to even if you call them your friend. For the second example, most times you are being grouped to work together as a team in a company, or better still, even if you work alone, you either have superiors or juniors you have to work with. Now, because of this reason, you need to start getting close to some set of persons, it is important for you to know that they are your constituent in your classification of friendship, you need them to achieve a set goal. You will agree with me that most times, your constituent are not chosen by you, they are people you just meet and you have to work with. It is now left for you to limit the friendship to the content that created it except if proven otherwise.

COMRADE

This classification of friends are those that are against what you are against, they are not to achieve what you want to achieve. They are there to fight . This kind of friendship don't usually last for long and they really should not, except if proven otherwise. A perfect example to discuss this is a protest. On the protest ground, you will meet a lot of people that are there to fight alongside with you, it does not mean that you all have the same end goal. You just need them to be able to fight together. It will be unwise to meet someone on a protest ground and then you start telling the person all that there is to your life, you are all just there to fight for a particular cause and once it is over, that is all. Majority of us have been on a protest ground and we have made friends with people that after the end of the protest, you have little or nothing to say to them again. This is because the cause you are fighting for alongside with them is over and hence, everyone will resume to their daily business. Most times if you want to defeat someone that is powerful than you, all you have to do is to look for another enemy of this same person you want to defeat. Clearly, two of you don't have the same goal, but you have the same person you are against. After the fight, your partnership with the person ends, and the friendship is over. As you progress in life, you will definitely need comrades.

COVENANT FRIENDS

These kind of friends are not always many, as a matter of fact, they can just be two and in some cases, one. This is because in covenant friendship, there is always vulnerability, you give yourself fully to the person, and you cannot give yourself to ten persons. This kind of friendship is demanding. It is born for adversity. In life, we need covenant friend that will have our back any day and any time. The kind of friend that is willing to sacrifice their all for us. The kind of friend that will allow us take that job offer instead of them because there is only one spot and that friend knows that you are more capable or you need the job more. That kind of friend that when the whole world stand against you because of a mistake that you have made, he or she is willing to stand by you. A friend that is willing to share in both your pain and in your happiness. Many of us have never had this kind of friend before, but we have made the mistake of placing someone that should be a comrade in a position of covenant friend and so we end up hurting. It is a good thing to have a covenant friend in your life, but if you don't, just make sure you place those that are in your life in the right category of friendship. Sometimes, our partners end up becoming our covenant friend. I hope you find that covenant friend soon if you do not have one in your life.

Do not group people where they should not be, it will only hurt you. learn to also call people your colleagues, your exercise mate, your course mate, your church mate, your hostel mat, your reading partner and so on. Not everyone is your friend. It is important that you know who you share deep matters with. Lastly, make sure you limit the content of every relationship to why it is there, i mean the content that gave birth to it.