Aloneness better then Selfish Person in life..

life is a place where you can't live alone you have always need someone help or someone together but in this place many types of people coming and going some are good some are bad and some selfish, when any man come to you and nicely talk with you it is not mean that the people was very pure heart becaus nowdays selfish people silently destroyed believe. So i think alone ness always better then it..

Alone ness is a things where no one can hurt you no one can play with your filings and no one can destroyed your good habitats..There only you and your life, to move forword in life all should support himself because no one can help you for your developed future...

Most people feel unhappy when alone, they need to be with others, they need the validation of others, they feel separate, uncomfortable. People who struggle to cope with being alone seem to judge themselves through the eyes of others, as if it is wrong to be alone, to like one's own company. Aloneness, and loneliness are two different states I feel.

I believe, and it is only my belief, I do not speak for others, that these feelings can be traced back to when we are children. The way children are often brought up, does not accept or allow for who they are, as unique human beings, individually. Rewards are given if the child follows the directions of their parents, teachers, and others within the system, a system designed to mould, control, grade, and indoctrinate.

That is my belief, a belief based on many years of experience personally, and through working in those self-same systems. The directions given to a child by these systems, may go against their nature, because these directives were not made by them, or for them. This has persisted for many years, and anyone who challenges this is made to feel as though they are wrong for doing so, and I remember well how that feels. The principles, and directives were made by others without your consent, or indeed input.

Naturally, every child is displaced. They are not in their own self. They are not themselves; they are somebody else. That somebody else is given to you by the society, by others.

I do not believe that being alone, is a form of loneliness, being alone can be beautiful, and positive, and not remotely lonely. Loneliness is I feel a state of being which causes great sadness that often leads to ill health, both physical, and mental.

People run away from loneliness. It is like a wound; it hurts. To escape from it, the only way is to be in a crowd, to become part of a society, to have friends, to create a family, to have husbands and wives, to have children. In this crowd, the basic effort is that you will be able to forget your loneliness. Better a Tiger for one day, than a Sheep for a thousand years!

There is a vast difference between loneliness and aloneness. Loneliness is a gap. Something is missing, something is needed to fill it, and nothing can ever fill it because it is a misunderstanding in the first place. As you grow older, the gap also grows bigger. People are so afraid to be by themselves that they will do anything to ease this, substance abuse, befriending others too quickly, looking for someone, anyone, often leading to greater feelings of loneliness, sometimes with added problems.

In order to avoid being alone we as humans want to remain engaged. That engagement may be with people, may be with work…. There are workaholics; they are afraid when the weekend comes close – what are they going to do? And if they don’t do anything, they are left to themselves, and that is the most painful experience.

If you can experience real aloneness, be comfortable with yourself in your own space, and to have really known how beautiful, and peaceful this is, as I myself have, to love yourself for who you are, nobody else, or what you have been told you are, then you can truly love. Love never grows out of fear.

Any relationship that is created because of the fear, because of the fear of being left alone, cannot be satisfying. The basis on which it has been formed is essentially wrong.

You don’t love your partner; you are simply using them not to be lonely; neither do they love you; they are also experiencing the same paranoia; using you in order not to be left alone. This cannot be the basis for any loving relationship, in whatever capacity, and yet we as humans do so, out of fear, the fear of being alone. Love never grows out of fear.

After being in tune with your aloneness, you can relate; then your relationship will bring much greater emotional satisfaction to you, because it is not out of fear. Finding your aloneness, you can create, you can be involved in as many things as you want, because this involvement will not anymore be running away from yourself. Now it will be your expression; now it will be all that is your potential. Nobody else, you, as a unique and beautiful human being, ready to give, and receive love, in whatever context, or relationship.

Only such people, whether they live alone, are married, unmarried, or living alone, it will not matter because they have experienced the beauty, and joy of their aloneness, and whatever circumstances they find themselves in, their peace, silence, and way of being brings with it an ambience, an openness that cannot be owned by anyone, nor taken by them.

However, you cannot find this in the crowd, by following the crowd, or by attempting to fit in with the crowd. By crowd I mean the system, the society, and the rules, and regulations laid down for all to follow, and the people who blindly obey without question. Better a Tiger for one day, than a Sheep for a thousand years.

The first basic premise I believe, is to know your own aloneness completely. Do not confuse it with loneliness, loneliness makes you unwell, aloneness is beneficial.

I myself know that for a large chunk of my own life, I was escaping from my feelings, and emotions, did not know who I was or what I really wanted, and tumbled headlong into an abundant number of relationships, trying to find peace, and tranquillity within those relationships. Sadly, these relationships were doomed to fail, due in part of my not knowing who I really was, seeking through others something to sate my needs emotionally, and I share full responsibility for those failure....