The Story of the Purpose of Life. You don't need to look for it, but create it yourself
There are times in our life that we experience empty periods. The meaning of empty time here is a time when we do not know where our life is going. I recently met a friend from college. During the meeting, he confessed that he was experiencing a crisis, not financial, but had lost his purpose in life. She complains that her life is monotonous, and that the big salary as a foreign language teacher doesn't make her happy.
I don't necessarily judge that he is less grateful, but behind his anxiety there are various reasons that I can't explain in this article. What he is telling me is in line with my own life in the past few years.
When I managed to put on a toga and presented my parents with a bachelor's degree, I was both scared and happy. A feeling of joy must arise for anyone who successfully graduated as a graduate, but a feeling of fear suddenly came over when the graduation procession ended.
There is a question that races in my heart "Where are you going after this?"
This question concerns concerns during the transition phase from graduating to undergraduate to the job search phase. In the first months after obtaining my undergraduate status, I had a strong passion for finding a job.
The spirit that was initially full of 100% gradually decreased. Optimism to find a job, which always starts with getting up early, preparing more than 5 application documents, and exploring the background of the company being applied for, is slowly starting to fade.
I started to wake up when the sun was leaning to the west. The application file is only one file, and even then sometimes forgets to attach a photo, and the author is getting lazy to research the background of the company being applied for.
The feeling of laziness is getting worse when the pandemic begins to enter Indonesia. Many industrial sectors are starting to take a hit and have begun to reduce employees. In that condition my laziness becomes doubled.
My simple reasoning concluded, under these conditions there would be no company opening job vacancies. For example, there must be very few and the chances of getting it are zero point a few percent.
Living the days full of obscurity, I seemed to be one with the bed. Activities in a day are just a shower, cleaning the house for a while, brewing and drinking coffee, sleeping, and keep repeating the next day. The days seem to go by so fast. I got to the point where I couldn't tell the difference between Sunday and Monday, it was all a day off. Unpleasant vacation for sure.
I began to waver and lose my purpose in life. A series of plans that were in my head during college fell apart, like leaves in spring. I feel sick when I see the life achievements of friends at the same age as me. Some have held high-profile positions in a well-known company, some have opened businesses, and some are planning to get married. I? Never mind getting married, there's no job yet.
The pain of fate and the attitude of comparing myself to others, I always harbored. I never showed it at all. When hanging out, for example, I try to follow and laugh with friends talking about authoritarian bosses, fussing about the bride when she decides on the theme of pre-wedding photos, or salary issues that don't live up to expectations.
I was smiling and laughing up front, but falling apart behind. The turning point came when I came home after hanging out. I used to hang out at the coffee shop near my house from 8 to 11 at night.
When I got home, the house lights were off. My mother is usually asleep by 9 pm. When I get home, I usually leave my wallet in my mother's room, automatically waking up the sleeping mother.
When I opened the door to my room, I saw the look on my mother who was getting older day by day. The sleepy expression on his face showed wrinkles on his forehead and cheeks. His hair is also starting to grow gray in some parts and his eye bags are getting bigger.
Believe it or not, I felt stung when I realized that mom was getting older and I still couldn't give anything away. Even so, my mother's treatment of me has never changed, in this case her affection.
In a slumped and unemployed condition, the mother continues to serve breakfast in the morning, shop for necessities at the market even though her steps are getting heavy, sweep the house, and keep asking God for the good of her child.
From my observations, maybe only a mother figure is able to accept our condition, no matter how bad and rotten it is.
Was there any crying after that? Not. Thoughts? Yes I started recasting what life meant to me and it fell on the mother figure. Happy mother.
As long as it's empty with no purpose. I like walking in an empty, dark, and directionless space. But, after finding a mother figure as a goal, I found a way. From the mother figure, I did not find light but created light.
The figure of a mother like a light that lies in front that guides to walk. In my heart I said "Yes, this is my goal to make him happy in his old age." The light guides me to walk in the dark room. Even though on my way in the dark room I had fallen, slipped, and stepped on a nail, at least I knew the direction and purpose.
The spirit to live life and focus on the purpose of life is like a pair of flip-flops, if one is missing, the other side is useless.
I don't know if this article is related to your life or not. But I hope there is some benefit from this. For me, the purpose of life is not to be sought, but to be created. Life goals can come from anywhere, don't be too grandiose to see life goals that are too big but look far away. Sometimes the purpose of life can be created from what is very close to us, but we forget to pay attention to it.
