Single-blessedness. It's not for everyone. Women, especially, have it bad when they remain single. That means NOT married. In these very modern times, not having a significant other falls very much in the category of being single.

Here's the thing: Being single is as much about fate as it is a choice. This is true for both women and men. Although men don't get as much grief as the ladies do if they remain unattached.

As heartbreaking as it may sound, some women just aren't meant to find the ONE that they end up walking down the aisle or signing a piece of paper with to signify they are together, therefore no longer single.

Serving a purpose

It's fate. There are women whose purpose in life is to care for parents, or siblings or whoever else in their family. Some find themselves with child or children, who bring them enough joy that having a husband is no longer a wish, dream, or goal.

Some are severely traumatized by an experience with a partner that they end up never wanting to go through a relationship again.

In a society where roles of men and women are traditional to the point of archaic - he is the provider, she is the homemaker and responsible for child rearing - an unattached female must steel herself often for the inevitable question: 'When are you getting married?'

Getting together with family and relatives can be so uncomfortable because aunts, even uncles, and grandparents will be asking the same thing over and over again: 'Are you married already?'

It can be so exasperating having to answer the same question that you often end up replying tartly. Yes, you can laugh about it, but it does rankle when it keeps happening every reunion or get-together or chance meeting.

A good comeback when asked 'Why are you still single?' is "Why not?"

Empowered women

Being single is not just about the freedom to do as you please without having to think of another person's opinion or feelings when you make a decision. It's not only about coming and going without having to ask anyone for permission or informing someone where you want to go or what you want to do.

I once read that a question to ask when considering marriage is whether you can stand to wake up beside the same person the rest of your life, seeing that same face as you open your eyes every morning, and being okay with it.

With women more empowered these days, singlehood is as prevalent as marriage. Why not, especially when many unions end up being broken somewhere down the line anyway.

Today, women are able to build careers, explore their skills, get better educated, run their own businesses, manage their own money and society has come to embrace this as a fact.

In the past, settling down in their early 20s was the norm. So before they can even begin to know who they are and what they can be capable of, it is being a wife, mother, and homemaker that defines their existence.

And there is nothing wrong with that. There are members of the female species precisely built or born to be wives and mothers. And they enjoy it, take pride in it, revel in it.

Ultimate goal

In the same way, more women now are realizing that being married does not, and will not, define who they are. They can be just as fulfilled having a job, pursuing a career, and giving of themselves to countless people not related to them by blood or law.

It takes a special kind of woman to choose single-blessedness. She must be confident enough to walk into a room filled with couples, or brave enough to stand before family and well-meaning friends and declare 'I am happy and content being single.'

A single woman can do so much good, contribute to her community, and spread joy and love just as a wife or mother can. It is a decision to live life to the fullest despite having no partner or husband.

Yes, it would have crossed her mind how she will get by when she grows old and is alone. And while there might be moments in her single life where she might feel lonely, there, too are rewards when she can enjoy the solitude, bask in her success, and give herself a pat in the back because she's made it so far even as an unattached female.

Does singlehood make a woman less of one? Is not striving to live as a compassionate, respectful, kind and decent human being the goal we all need to aspire for and achieve?

Sometimes, it is fate that dictates your eventual status in life. In the end, it is what you choose to do regardless of your status that matters and gives significance to your life.