What are dreams made of?

Last night after a lot of turning and rolling and switching places with the two babies (kids actually) around me, I finally fell asleep. Then I woke up.

What was that? It was real… The setup, the characters, the happenings.

I was witnessing a caterpillar walk through the towel while I was on the top of a cabinet which I have climbed up to with the help of the stairs of the double deck beside it. Then I was reaching for something making the cabinet sway until it fell. What about that the caterpillar? Nevermind.

Because of the fall, the clothes that was kept inside the cabinet went out their way to meet the floor. I don’t remember anymore what happened next but I’m sure that I slept some more before waking up.

It was around five o’clock when I woke up. But I stayed in bed. The caterpillar on my mind. What could have happened to it?

There were other events prior to me being on top of the cabinet. But I only remembered the feelings. It was like another reality was already there somewhere and we only get to visit that reality in dreams. Sigh.

Last night I went on reading a story. Right after the last paragraph, I decided to turn the device off and ‘x’ the assignments/requirements that I still have not finished. Tomorrow will be another day. And so I slept, not early, but earlier than I expected. And came the dream that felt like reality.

Maybe, that will come true in the future. It may be the trajectory of the life I am leading now.

You know what? I have dreamt about me writing. That was years ago when I was not writing. I dreamt that I was writing about something while my first child and their dad were watching tv. And the topic I was writing about was the same when the reality of that dream was realized. I am not exaggerating.

On a dormitory, I’ve been a matron for some time. I dreamt about one of the interns coming to me on an evening at the study room pleading about something. The words she used and the expression she had on her face, was delivered almost exactly how I dreamt about it. So I was telling her, have you been practicing your line and have you been thinking about me? How come I knew what you were going to tell even before you told me about it? I saw the relief on her face. She must have thought that I was joking but it was true.

Until now, I was trying to convince myself that dreams are nothing short of thoughts at night that either happened or not. It is just a coincidence in case it/they happened or will happen.

After I’ve been frowned upon (adopted language) because of my unsolicited prophetic suggestions, I stopped asking about blood types, temperaments, etc. And my father appreciated it if I stopped making guesses about my siblings’ situations or feelings. Many times I felt unwelcome because of my own doing. So then, I began to not give that much importance to my prophetic gift. But then, real dreams come again. They usually come when I get a good night’s sleep during my periods. Almost always.

But I would like to stick to my reformed character of being careful with what I tell people. I am not a ‘manghuhula’ or whatever so I’d better keep my mouth shut and keep on writing and doing my job and studying. My husband remarked one time that there seemed to be a witch in the house because how come all our plants got withered away after some time? The papaya, which we thought would already bear fruit had its baby fruits just falling for no particular reason. The onion and tomato which used to be generous before had died out of being famished. I explained to him that it is a result of them not being cared for. I already made clear my position that I can’t do other things consistently. I have other business to attend to. But he still saw like someone of a witch. I can’t blame him but then his suspicions may not be unfounded, after all.

But then again, we have a God, who is more reliable and whom we could trust more than our seemingly prophetic gifts and whatever. I’d like to rebuke whoever or whatever is making me believe that I have a gift or something. I am just an ordinary Christian. And besides, it is hard not to believe. It is best to have only one God. You know exactly whom you should pray to amid the trials and tribulations that come your way. I am again in the questioning stage and I wouldn’t want to be put to trial again so I’d better straighten out my mind and stop my hesitation of continuing my faith.

Let’s not worry over dreams that we think might happen later. Whether they will happen or not, we couldn’t do something about it because in the first place it isn’t definite whether they will really happen or not. They will just put us in awkward situation so it’s best to do the best we can in our lives. We just can’t rely on dreams. They will just impede us from going on or moving on.