“Trudge the path that beckons you the most…”

The moment I thought of taking a break was the moment I wanted to punch the damn keys!

Hello, you, lovely people! How are you today? I’m fine, thank you! Or, I’m good, thank you! Whatever!

Actually, I only felt like rambling again. There is no particular topic I wanted to tackle right now. I have one draft sitting on my Microsoft word but it’s about school concerns so and so that is why I don’t feel like sharing it here yet. In good times. And it’s vacation.

The sky’s clear. For the whole day, it didn’t rain. Or was there a little drizzle? But no rain. Thankfully, after a month of rain, the weather’s better now. A good time again to prepare for the coming rainy days.

Last night, I was reading a suspense novel, but since I was no good at suspense, after reading a hundred pages, I just turned to the last page to see the ending, and there my reading ended! Could you believe that? I didn’t lose interest but reading the ending was enough to satiate me for that particular novel. Wahahahaha!

I think I have only read a few novels from cover to cover without missing a single word. Lately, I fast-track my reading by getting just the summary impression. Save it for really interesting ones. I need recommendations! Oh no, don’t recommend anything, I have a list already. Hahahaha. I asked before from fb friends that they recommend me readings and I obtained interesting titles.

I’m a mess, right? Is it too obvious?

Later tonight, I will try to see what has remained of the books my sisters dumped at me to keep. A lot of John Grisham’s then some of Jeffrey Archer’s. Out of laziness I wasn’t able to procure the law books of my only brother. It would be fun to study those law books even though I am not a law student. Just trying. What if I will finally be able to find my soul? Hahaha. The pile of accounting books I thought I would be able to explore had just been a pile of books after my desire to learn was a history of the past. I lost my interest. Period. Hahaha.

There was a time when I wanted to tackle so many things at once but I received the advice… “TRUDGE THE PATH THAT BECKONS YOU THE MOST, AND IF YOU MUST TAKE THEM ALL, DO IT ONE AT A TIME.”

But now all wanted is to finish my master’s, be able to meet the minimum requirements for future recommendations, and be able to improve my writing or explore my real interest. Still struggling to settle on one.

Hmmm… I should hire a secretary to keep track of what I am rambling about. Should I put a disclaimer on every first part of my articles? That everything I write is fiction? To save me from reckless ramblings? Disclaimer, I bet that would be a good strategy. But how about my credibility? See, it’s hard to earn credibility. Once you lose your logic or your coherence, you are like an all talk, all promises person who fails to honor or to at least be tactful with his/her promises. So in the beginning there should always be a sincere disclaimer. It’s to keep us intact. But this is just me being defensive. Do I sound defensive? Or funny? Or ridiculous?

You know what makes me a real spectator? It is my hesitance to actually believe myself. Do you believe yourself? Confidence matters. Self-confidence. It’s what I have been struggling to maintain. And you know, it helps to know how to compliment others. Why? Because they may be having low confidence and the only thing that may help is hearing some good stuffs from other people. Sincere and positive comments. How d’you call it? Constructive criticism, right? Yes, constructive criticism. I think, I needed to go back to my English basics. If not, read good authors and pick their language. It was how I have survived so far. Though I stopped doing such for a while now. I was left on my own and it was terrible!

I don’t know if it hit me again but I’ve been feeling quite low. Was I struck by something? Maybe. Why is it so easy to cope sometimes and very hard the next? Why do we have all the right words at one point and write all the wrong at other occasions? Why do we have to go low when we can just maintain our pace? But whatever, let us relearn and reflect and do all sorts of helpful things for ourselves!

Hear ye, people! Hear ye, Lincs! Wake up! Wake up! It’s time for dinner.