Does it mean anything to you? This day isn't celebrated worldwide and if not on the same day. Mother's Day. Once it was celebrated to honour the goddess, mother Earth. It was long before certain cultures existed, cultures and countries who look down upon what they call today pagan but is it?
Each belief starts somewhere and what Christians, Muslims celebrate, preach and believe today isn't much different from what ancestors believed hundreds of years ago. It might be they didn't celebrate Mother's Day the way we do today but they honoured women which is something many of us don't do. We do not honour mothers, we do not honour women. We do not treat them in the way we like to be treated, we despise them, scold at them, abuse them. We take them for granted and if we visit them at all it's most likely not on Mother's Day.
Mothers are not important enough. They are those women who you cannot have fun with, those women who are always tired, wear dirty clothes and drag with their children. Those women who are busy 24/7 and you cannot have an intelligent conversation with.
Mothers... Do they need this day? This modern commercial invention has nothing to do with honouring those women who care and share the last bit of what they have and pay for it with their health, hopes, dreams?
If I read the news I am shocked at how mothers are treated. I'm shocked about the monsters we raise and I ask myself where it went wrong, what those mothers missed, refused to see, what made them close their eyes for reality, the truth.
I'm a mother and I'm not blind. Not so blind that I can't tell the difference. You can call me a bad mother and perhaps I am. You can say I'm not loyal to what's mine and that can be but I have values and norms I live by and do not deny reality.
Does this day, Mother's Day, mean anything to me? The answer is no, not if this is the only day my children reach out to me. I do not expect presents, there's no need to celebrate just because it is one of those days shops love to sell their shampoo, deodorant, perfume and soap. I'm not a mom you can make happy with such gifts, I'm not a mother you can buy, a person who believes what is bought, expensive proves how much I am loved, appreciated.
Some mothers make a wishlist, tell their children what to buy. Their expectations are high and it shows. It can be a hard task for children to meet those sky-high expectations. Any idea how it is to deal with an angry or disappointed mother because she didn't receive what commercials promised her? Any idea how it is to be forced into celebrating if your mother walked out, is a monster, abusive or... she died?
The "inventor" of today's Mother's Day started to hate it because it's all about the money, about buying, spending, no longer about honouring, respect and sharing quality time.
It's easier to buy something than to visit your mother once or twice a week. While writing this I think back to what a nurse in the nursery home said: "one mother can take care of ten children but ten children can not take care of one mother". This is reality, what mothers mean to society.
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Mother's day - a story
(A freewrite I wrote and like to share with you)
We were back in her kitchen, having lunch, as she had suggested.
I considered it a waste of time but since she was my mother and because Mother's day was coming up I thought it might be smart to do as she implied. At least today wasn't the day. I had no intention to make her day on that so-called special day meant to honour my mother. A day she took from me. She was the one who had broke my dreams, took away the chance of being a mother. Her behaviour, her aggression, had kicked the life out of me and I knew I would never get over it. I had lunch with one of the best actresses of this era. She pretended as if nothing had happened and at those rare moments she realized I was down she told me to focus on the future. Looking back wasn't her style neither was apologizing. She was never the one to blame, the one who did anything wrong, harmed or regretted what she had done.
He did not come from Athens, he continued, but his brother lives here.
My mother kept reciting what he had told her and of course, the man she cited was a gentleman. To me, he sounded like a creep, a big scam. She continued her story while shoving her fork with mixed salad inside her big mouth and I asked myself if I cared. Did I?
"You don't mind honey," she asked without waiting for my response, "he says grown-up children can be extremely jealous if their parent starts a new relationship especially..."
It's fine, all good, she gets what she deserves... finally, I told myself. With some luck, she was busy, busy on Mother's Day and with some more luck, he gave her what she... although, wasn't Karma a bitch? Wasn't my mother the bitch?
I finished my lunch in silence, lifted my head a few times as in a nod while she kept quoting her new admirer. He didn't come from Athens but that didn't mean he wasn't Greek and was fishing or was it phishing?
"How did you meet again?" I interrupted her as I stood up and placed my plate into the sink.
It turned out to be a perfect day. The rain started falling and no one showed up on the day she once let out the entire world would regret and honour her. No one did and I felt grateful for the epidemic that had made it unthinkable to visit the one in need, the person I never was able to forgive. That fatal lunch we had together became a memory out of the past I no longer shared with her. My wish finally came true. Year after year I prayed for a solution and finally Karma was at my side. The bitch became what she deserved. It hit her like a boomerang, the kind she threw and never expected back because it usually ended up in dense thickets or a dog ran out with it.
That Greek... He wasn't from Athens nor Greece. His life story was a fairy tale she had believed including the non-existing brother.
How he had reached out to her, that witch! Unawares...
He took everything, made her believe it was a temporary malfunction, a glitch. Finally, mother's day had come and she was gone.
I agree with you. I have always questioned Mother's Day because of its current commercial nature.
All current celebrations have commercial motivation behind them. Sales seasons to benefit corporations. I have had discussions about it with my mother when I give her my arguments about the futility of them. She tells me that I cannot go against the traditions of the world, but I do not listen to her, and I say yes. Lately, she has agreed with me.
Honoring father and mother is an everyday task, and accepting that there is a day for it is to justify and wash away the awareness of such omission for the majority. An expression of lack of love, and in the best of cases, of selfishness and weakness of spirit for being manipulated by a materialistic world.