It's A Dream 25042024

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6 months ago

The door opens to the one-person-capacity balcony. Overlooking the meadow, the breeze, the smell of grass from the distant, it was relaxing. The neighbor to the left has a longer and larger balcony, and a smaller metal grid that looks like a balcony in between, but wasn't designed for people to stand; just some places where if you accidentally drop your items from the windows, it won't fall all the way down. To the right, there was a square-spiral staircase down to the very bottom. Further right, it was foggy in one's dream.

Wait, why are there 2 people standing on the metal grid in front of one's window, overlooking the meadow. Both short, but one fat, one thin. Off you go... So one kick them down, all the way it fall. One enter back into the room. The next day, they're still standing there, not going anywhere. One thought, perhaps the door is too small, not enclosing the balcony; so let's make the balcony indoor. (See notes 1)

That means calling someone to replace the door with a folding door that could enclose the whole balcony. After some text exchange, they started chatting to one, and one thought, why not handle the problem first? They say, they're just middle man waiting for someone else to come and fix that thing for one. Oh, yeah, ok. Eventually, the door is magically fixed; but one didn't register it as "fixed," but the person had already hung up. One expect a message back.

One don't know how he/she is going to reach one, but when opening one's instagram, one found there was 10+ new messages, so perhaps somehow she got to my instagram via some unknown methods? Anyway, clicking into the message, it was written in language that one don't understand. Most importantly, there was a popup with a button on it. How did you even do a popup on an instagram app? Unfortunately, the button is enchanted, such that it can enchant whoever sees the button to press the button. That's the start of a computer virus spreading.

The problem with this virus, which one dubbed "the back button virus", is that you can't press the back button on your phone. Every time you press "back," it'll be replaced by something it want you to type. For example, that button redirects you to download an infected game, but it requires you to login to your play store to do the downloading, so if one's email address is "wabinab@read.cash", then every time you press the back button, it'll auto fill: "w", "a", "b", "i"... Pause!!!

If the back button doesn't work, how about the hamburger menu? The hamburger menu brings up a list of active apps, so you can drag and close them, or switch app. Ok, let's do that. Ok, it's successful. Now, you'd not want to click back in again until you delete the app and reinstall, and clear your phone of virus. That's not true; one thought, if one want to browse instagram, clear the memory and click back in, it should be at the home page again, isn't it? Just like you search things in instagram, you drag and close, you go back in, it's in home page. So, it won't be infected by virus again, yes? No, that's not true.

The moment one click back into it, it displays a page lacking of design. It only have some illegible images blurred from one's point of view, and a button. This button isn't enchant, but one would like to go back home, so one press that back button. Alas! The back button curse works again! Pressing the back button automatically redirects to press that button on the screen, and here you go, you're redirected to a page that downloads the game. The game screen, to attract your attention, is a half-nude sexy model that don't need extra description (you see these nowadays in China ads, China apps, when browsing Chinese novels pirated page, usually as a box on the bottom right; not sure about other countries'). Now, you're doomed. The page locks all your button. You can't turn off your phone pressing the power button. You can't change the volume pressing the volume button. The home button, hamburger button, all don't work anymore. You have 2 choice.

First, pull out the battery. Unfortunately, that may only stop it temporarily, and pluck it back in, one don't know what will happen. The problem is, the battery is no longer easily removed. New phones nowadays built in their batteries such that mundane people can't remove them. Furthermore, not every home have screwdrivers to crank the back cover out, or unscrew it if applicable. Basically, since battery cannot be remove anymore, that leaves us with one final step: factory data reset.

And yeah, here it goes, the pin goes in, goes out, black screen, restart the phone back, it's all back at usual, with all your data, settings, preferences, lost. If you have a China's phone which didn't have Play Store readily installed, and can't install with ease, that's a hell load of a way towards setup, all because of a back button.

The sun rise up, it's time to wake up. That's the end of the dream.

Notes:

  1. It's weird, they're standing on the metal grid, but one is enclosing the balcony; there's no logic in dreams, right?

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