It's a fact that I can't lie in this small world!

Solitude gives me strength that never ceases.

There are also those who do not ask.

Prefers to question.

It doesn't matter anymore who they are.

I neither obey the seasons nor the hidden heaven on earth, at least I know that there is a hidden garden inside me, but the hell called the earth sees the heaven in me or someone defines me as shallow because when I have difficulties, I always cling to people I believe in or have been tricked into believing.

Of course, this is just a flutter: I can see that the pain and the dizziness that hasn't left me for days doesn't matter to someone, but I still complain, maybe it's considered that I'm buzzing like a fly, whereas I'm a moth in love with fire and I still have hope for people.

It's a fact that I can't lie, as if that wasn't enough, I didn't hide what God knows.

And here's the wall I bumped into.

How many points can be made, especially when the troubles you experience are a source of happiness for most people?

I've been trying for days or should I say years, as long as I get the pen on track and I feel a lot in order to produce, and I am literally knocked down during the day, and I have been overflowing with emotions, even overdose, in recent years, while I have known my brain as my capital for a lifetime.

Even if my eyes are tearing, I shed my tears when I've been hurt enough, and I can't die for it.

There are writers I read and I collect almost all of their writings in my library, sometimes destroyed, sometimes in love with their pen and I want their existence to be compatible with my pen.

This is also a disaster because I lose the original rhythm of my pen, whenever I read with different authors, I get influenced and lose my originality, however, time does not pass without reading, and I must state that; While it takes me only three or four days to read a 400-page book, I don't want to end the day without scribbling on five or ten pages.

My desk, where I have been perched for days, I usually get up every ten minutes and tour the house, or when I spend time with my friends and family, on the other hand, I consult with anyone I love, who is good for my soul thanks to the phone, on the other hand, I am going through a change.

I want to be placed, but people position me: it's very likely that any person you can think of will do.

My place in society is ordinary as well as extraordinary, when I can't lift my head from the troubles that are sometimes unspoken and will never come, and while I touch life every night as hope.

When I am not hopeful, people divide into different groups and judge me:

Some people don't believe me and they put me down with my pessimism, and they look at me with suspicious eyes as soon as I start to talk about what I'm suffering.

On the other hand, some people question my faith, as if they have reached the highest level of guidance, the division in society and the debate of who is a believer and who is not, somehow separates people.

I can't figure out where I belong.

I am a believer, a democrat, a secularist and I do not discriminate between people, but I am also categorized as if my life has been caricatured.

I spent my life lovingly and now I see it as a waste of time.

No matter what job I did or as a student, I lost everything I loved, everyone and I continue to love something in order to lose it again.

While love is an addiction for me, people despise the power of love in interaction and friendship and vice versa:

After all, everyone, everyone is loving and positive on the face of it, but I know such people that I know people who change their attitudes over time; those who support me as much as they love and suddenly turn their backs.

My heart's eye, which is a separate fact when I naively believe, and which comes into existence in a way that I do not understand, and those who say that I am ridiculed or that it seems to me since I realized this.

While I've just freed my inner voice, it's almost like a warning lamp that constantly warns me, and whether it's the tone of the other person's voice or whether he's telling the truth or not.