I have a soul that I feed with love that does not want to feel sorrow

There are facts that I need to sleep. Of course, my life is no different from a dusty book that is hidden for reasons, maybe forgotten, lying on its side in the gigantic library of the cellar I hide in.

After my education life, which I neither envisioned a utopia nor supposedly successful, the well that I fell into, and the revenge I took from those who forbade laughing when I was still the apple of the family's eye:

Of course, I can easily love the whole world, every living thing, even objects.

The miserable child in me, whom I adopted while I was struggling for a lifetime and the opportunities offered to me were sometimes the amount of a book or a treasure, but my most precious treasure, in order not to say to hell with the teachings.

I am ancestral.

The dilemmas that have come to my share from the climate are that in the military headquarters where I was brought up with the rule of being a decent and correct person in every sense, my arrival and departure times are measured in minutes, and being late for a minute causes great disasters.

There was not a single human theme that I overlapped, neither yesterday nor today.

The impositions of society never ended.

Then we jumped into an era, and I still did not feel like an adult after having the honor of being a girl jumping rope in her room, of course I grew up, of course I grew up, but my early teenage years, where I was still stuck, and still an inexhaustible enthusiasm and love inside me.

There were so many things going through my mind when I started writing, and I have a Kafka research review book in my hand.

It would be correct if I say that there was not a single person I imitated, after all, I had responsibilities for a lifetime while I kept my student rank in my library even though I am not actively working at the moment.

And the seven dwarfs playing hide and seek on the shelves of my mind.

What's my size?

Or what and whom do I dare?

Moreover, who can I blame that, after a beautiful life that was offered to me, I am asking for an account, but it is not enough...

I'm looking for someone to my left and right and bingo!

Of course, it's a waste of time and I lost altitude: what can I do with my right and my left and my past, but since development is a continuous process, I also struggle happily to be a good writer, maybe I'm chasing my dreams that I can never achieve, actually I question from time to time while the pen is after me. my life…

Of course, I have burned many ships too, and these days, without pitying myself, I throw tens and hundreds of pages of writings and poems that I do not like and that I have displayed, without blinking, into the wastebasket.

Since I have responsibilities towards myself beyond being admired and loved, I have known myself not only about this day, but also for as long as I can remember.

I have a rough temperament and have never felt sorry for myself under any circumstances. My favorite thing is a feature that I discovered during the years when I invested a lifetime in my brain and was closely interested in psychology:

The pleasure and pain of surpassing myself by accomplishing many things thanks to the orders I give to my brain with an order-command chain that triggers my humanity and body resistance by reaching the maximum level of that idle capacity that is not being used in our brain.

Let's go to sampling.

In fact, there was not a single person I took as an example, it was induction: even though I endured everything I had and suppressed my emotions for a lifetime, finally that day when my logic exploded and I found myself writing at work, just like whatever dream came true many times before, I made a superhuman effort and proved myself in a short time. .

Of course, the reward also came into play:

You know, one step after success, and the reverse, which allows more people to love you, of course:

As I progress, the number of people who don't like you may increase as I invest in myself for my future, but this is never in my field of interest. It is possible to feel sadness, I have a soul that I feed with love, in fact, most of us are like that, but if I knew my purpose and did not deviate from my path, love and happiness are growing at an incredible speed.

My orderly, empty, crazy life also has its justification. Rather than stare into the still emptiness around me, I can continue the double-talk within myself. For me, that's the only way to be good."

The charm of a majestic daydream rather than an uneasy reality, and my imagination when it was incredibly vast since my childhood, and my dreams that take on different roles that change shape day by day.

On the one hand, ideas that make you think.

It is a great feeling to know that I am not alone, although I find solace in the difficulties and inferences of the lives of the two writers who are not living as of now, but I still can't get enough of it, and I have always perceived happiness differently than other people.

Both the importance my family attaches to my education, the things stolen from my life, and here are the things that were stolen from my life, and here is my day by far, in fact, I am looking for ways to be happy in my temperamental dreams tomorrow, and despite all the difficulties, I am happy when I am at least loving and writing happiness.

What success means is debatable, and it is an indisputable fact that I do not belong to the consumption-oriented twenty-first century, and I equate that huge bracket life hidden in my child's soul with love and writing, and what I focused on before: both my student life, professional anxiety and I cannot help but say that the pen has increased my resistance as a refusal and miserable ignorance, rather than my efforts to make money, of course.

Apart from adapting to the era, while the pen adapts to me and thanks to this, I have overcome and surpassed many things thanks to my reader, provided that the obvious details are reserved for me...

And as loneliness brings courage and nobility, not defeat, and emphasizes:

Solitude gives me strength that never ceases.