Mental Health Awareness

I was in 8th grade when I experienced depression. I didn’t expect that I’d feel that way. As a teenager, I thought that no one would be able to help me. I couldn’t talk about it to other people and I was afraid to tell my parents about it. It was one of the hardest parts of growing up. I couldn’t tell which exactly is the reason why I was depressed. All I know is that I am sad and I no longer want to continue living. Going to school no longer excites me and I don’t like the school activities. I just want to quit and stay in my room. Maybe it was the stress because of school works, maybe it was because I was undergoing puberty that time and I had lots of pimples which made lowered my self-esteem, maybe it was because I don’t have friends like most of my peers, or maybe because was always being scolded at home. Maybe one of those reasons. All I know is that it didn’t feel good. There’s an instance when I almost hang myself using a rope but I hesitated. There’s a time when I almost hurt myself with a blade. And there were times when I couldn’t help but hit my head against the hard wall.

I was reminded of these painful memories again. But I’m also happy that I was already over that period in life. I’m happy that I didn’t give up on my life and endured the hardships.

I was reminded of those days when one of my friends on Facebook keeps posting stuff about depression. I ignored it at first thinking that she’s just an attention seeker or something. But then I was bothered when once again I came across her post that gives clues about depression and suicide. It’s like she’s indicating that her life is useless. Since I am not close with that girl, I ignored it once again.

But two days ago, I encountered her post again. It was on her daily status. Her first story goes like this:

The world is in chaos, it is too noisy. Good thing I always have a blade with me.

At first, I didn’t think that it was about suicide because what I saw in the photo are pieces of jewelry. So I clicked the next button again and saw her next story and it goes like this:

Oh,  they’re actually fascinated when I tell them I can survive a day without food and water.

And at the lower part of the screen, it says like this:

Tired of living. Tired of being unimportant.

That’s when I realized that it was the same girl who has cryptic posts before. And when I clicked the screen once again, It was a black and white photo of an arm with cuts and looks like it was cut using a blade. That’s when I panicked and immediately went to check her account. Sad to say, all her posts and shared memes are all about anxiety, depression, and suicide. But the odd thing is that it seems like the people around her are ignoring it. I’ve been in that period, so I know she’s not kidding. Those are not just memes but she’s actually depressed and needs some help. When I checked the reactions and comments on her posts, the majority are not taking it seriously, like she’s just kidding or something.

The thing about mental health and problems is that it can’t be seen. So people would not always believe it when someone has mental problems unless they saw the serious effects. We should normalize taking mental problems seriously. When someone shares with us something that may be related to a mental issue, we should take the time to listen and help that person in any way possible. Sometimes, it is enough when there is someone who is willing to listen to us.

And when talking about mental health and issue, don’t always jump to conclusion that the person is going bonkers. Mental health problem doesn’t always mean being crazy.