Dad was hospitalized. Only mother and younger sister at home. The father is the only earner in the family. The present time is passing through a severe crisis due to the illness of the father. I can't do that either. Only in the second year of Honors. Then I was running around for a job. Graduation is complete and where thousands of young people are looking for jobs, they are not getting it. It is very, very difficult for me to get a job while I am studying for honors there. Then I try to get a job.
Meanwhile, I saw my younger sister saying to my mother that day, after three months of college salary is left, her exams are ahead. Notice from the college has to be given before the examination.
I had two rupees in my pocket then. After hearing all this, I left the house. As I was leaving, I saw an eight- to ten-year-old boy standing in front of me with a small child on his lap. I walked a little closer. I saw the boy was still crying. This is not the first time I've seen a boy on this street in front of a house. I have been seeing him here since I was little, but then his mother was with him. Today I see only the boy, and a small child in his lap. I don't know the boy's name. But I call him Sangram Saheb. There is a story behind this name. Stay, I'll tell you another day. Don't be a little secret.
As soon as I approached and asked the reason for the mud, I tried to cry. I said to myself, let's eat something good with you in that shop in front of Sangram. The boy has not eaten for two days and has not eaten anything in his stomach except water. Going home, he begged and got some food for his younger sister. The girl in Sangram's lap is his sister. Age will be a little more than one year.
With two bucks in my pocket, with the promise of feeding Sangram good food..when I go to sit in a chair inside a high quality restaurant; Just then my eyes fell on the back table. I saw Mira sitting. My acquaintance with Mira is long. After a long time, I wanted to talk to him in a normal way! Excluding the intense desire of the mind, I sat at the next table with the struggle. Mira probably didn't see me. When he saw it, he would rush to talk.
I called one of the shopkeepers and told him to give me some good food. The man looked at me strangely and went to fetch food. I sat down and started thinking that I have only two rupees in my pocket, I don't think the bill will come down to one hundred rupees after eating. I was wondering where to give the money, just then Mira stood in front. There are more than one glance. I looked once, rolled my eyes. He came and sat next to me. I'm looking outside.
- How are you, Masood?
- Alhamdulillah, I'm fine. Are you ok
- Yes, I'm fine. What are you doing nowadays? Where are you I went to your mess that day, someone said you left the mess! What happened?
- Looking for a job, yes; I left the previous mess. Now I am at a relative's house. Nothing happened Mira, I'm pretty much with my parents and sisters. What are you doing
- I'm not doing anything right now except studying. I can clearly see the look of frustration on your face! Any problems?
- I need some money, Mira. Can you pay?
- Of course! What do you do when you think you want money I will not give! Tell me how much money you need?
- Give me two hundred rupees. I'll pay later.
- Two hundred rupees! What to do? You brought the boy sitting next to you here to eat something, and you have no money in your pocket! Isn't it?
- Yes, you're right. It would be wrong to say there is no money, there are two rupees.
- Whatever you eat, I'll pay whatever comes. Don't worry about money.
- All right.
I stood outside on the side of the road with a bill of two hundred and eighty rupees. Mira and a little later came and stood beside me.
- Can Mira do another good?
- Tell me what to do for now. You never asked me for help for yourself. Today he is not saying what he wants.
- Can you buy a packet of milk?
- Come on. I went to that shop.
I bought a packet of milk for two and a half hundred rupees and handed it over to Sangram. Don't cry anymore. With this packet, I can feed your sister for a few days.
The struggle is over. Whenever I went to say something to Mira, she pulled my hand, signaling me to be quiet, and handed me some money.
- Masood, there's some money here. Leave it. It will be useful for you.
To each answer I said, 'Let's get you home'! Mira seems to have eaten a little vyabacheka. She can't believe I told her to get home, she can!
- Come on.
As soon as she came in front of Mira's house, Mira stopped. This time I looked at him a little. I have been watching this well-known man for so long. It would not be right to look for a long time. I rolled my eyes. I know why it seems that Mira wants to say something. Mira called as soon as I stepped forward! After a long time, I heard someone calling Maya Makhano!
- Will Mira say something?
- No, you had something to say. Listen a little?
- No, he doesn't want to hear. Go home I went. Allah Hafez.
Without giving Mira a chance to say anything more, I stepped forward. Going a little further, I looked back a little again. Mira is still staring at him.
This time I stepped forward a little faster.
The phone is ringing. I got out of bed. I heard the voice of the mirror to receive the phone from the table!
- Hello, how are you Masood?
- Alhamdulillah, good. Are you ok
- Yes, good. What are you doing now?
- Nothing like that. I was lying down, I got up from bed to receive your call and received the call.
- Are you sick? It sounds like words!
- No Mira, body is good. Nothing happened.
- Well, good. Can you meet me outside the campus gate tomorrow?
- Well, I'll go to the two.
- All right. Rakhi now, be well.
I left it before Mira put down the phone. I have loved him since my school days with Mira. He did not know that at first. No one else knew that I loved him, that I felt the first love of my life when I saw him! In school life, except for Mira, I used to talk to almost everyone, mostly about education. But I never said anything about studying with Mira! I would not talk to him because of the inertia! Inertia only worked more in his case! Mira was the first love feeling in her life, that's probably why the inertia used to work a lot when she saw him. But from a distance I tried to explain something to Mira in different ways. I rolled up the sleeves of my school shirt, held it ... and tried to present myself a little better in front of the mirror! I don't know if he noticed this then, but day after day I tried to present myself to him more strangely and from a distance. After the school holidays, walking outside the gate to see him for a while seemed like the longest time in the world! After a long wait, when I saw a group of uniformed girls coming, I would look for Mira in the middle of a group of uniformed girls hiding from the wall! As soon as I came to the gate, I would go into hiding for fear of 'Mira will see'! The moments of waiting outside the gate for hours to miss the class period, to see the beloved face for two minutes, today .. invaluable to me even after all these years! But those three words were never said! This is how school life ended. In college life, I have almost always seen Mira like this from behind. But no feelings were mentioned. Mira doesn't know anything about this yet! And if he knows, he doesn't let me understand! .. Thinking about all this, I fell into a deep sleep.
I haven't dreamed for a long time!
I woke up in the morning to hear someone crying! As soon as I got out of bed and went to my mother's room, I saw a group of people standing around my mother's bed! I went a little closer. I sat next to my mother's frozen, silent body. Little sister is almost in a coma crying! I put my hand on my mother's forehead and sighed and told everyone to leave the house. Everyone went out. Today, even after growing up, the man who used to take me by the mouth and feed me with his hands every day, after a while he would come to my room and put his hand on my head and say 'Dad, don't worry, your father will be fine .. you study with your mind' .... that man is no more! I tried to keep myself normal. Although tears were about to come, I did not let them come!
Mother had no disease. Maybe this family, father's illness has to think about these ... !!
Everything happened very quickly! The janaza was done at two o'clock in the afternoon ... I buried my mother's body in the graveyard and returned home at three o'clock in the afternoon. The younger sister is sitting in my room crying. I sat next to him, I did not try to give him any kind of peace. After sitting quietly for a while, I came out of the house again. I did not see Sangram outside the house today. Walking aimlessly .. Almost evening came closer. I stood in front of Mira's house for a while! I wanted to see him a little! After four minutes, Mira came down. He opened the gate of the house and stood in front of me.
- Why do you look like that, Masood?
- How! It's a little dark so you're wrong.
Having said that, I adjusted my glasses a little. I started reading my glasses from class nine.
- Well, let's go to my house.
I didn't say anything. I stood silently. After a while Mirai came a little further and started pulling my hand towards the house. I reached in front of the stairs and took my hand. Mira once turned back and said 'Come'. I followed Mira to their drawing room and sat down. Mira sat me down and went to her room. After a while his parents came and sat in front of me. I have left the sleeves, shoes and patches on the shirt. The condition of the pants is good. I have been reading it for only one year. I stood up as soon as Mira's parents came forward! They both looked at me from head to toe. Sit down for a while. Then he left again! I guessed the matter. I left Mira's house and stood outside the door. After a while I looked inside with Uki. Mira was doing makeup for so long! Blue sari, blue bangles, light lipstick on the lips! For a few seconds I looked at him with one glance. After a while I saw him wiping away tears!
Nah, it wouldn't be right to stay here long. I got out. I need to go to the hospital and find my father. I left Mira's house to go to the hospital.
Arriving in front of the hospital, it seemed as if there was a thumping feeling today. I crawled into the hospital. I went to my father's cabin and saw that there was no father! The head began to spin! I crouched down and started walking towards the reception. The further I go, the more the pain on the left side of my chest increases. I had to go to the reception and say my father's cabing number and name .. The man sitting at the reception told me .. I was not ready to listen at all! This time I started to feel a little bad inside!
I slowly started walking towards a dark room. I felt a little too dark to enter! Two more men with torches in their hands entered the room to keep the body. One is hugging me tightly, and the other is moving forward. The man in my arms began to follow me and the people in front of me. My father's frozen, silent body was brought in front of me. The white cloth was removed from the face.
I put my hand on my father's forehead. I looked into my father's eyes very closely! That eye is saying only one thing over and over again .. '' Dad! You don't break at all. Don't worry about us. Take a look at your sister. And take care of yourself ''!
This time tears started flowing in my eyes. Then I tried to control myself as much as possible.
I was taken out of there. I came to the veranda of the hospital and saw Mira standing with some friends! Except me, almost everyone is crying! My father died. The family is none other than me and my younger sister. Why am I crying because of the pain ... My friend Maruf came and grabbed me and sat me on the bench. Almost everyone sat on either side of me. Mira is standing just in front along. I looked at the mirror once. Eye to eye. I stared into Mira's eyes for a few seconds. Mira lowered her eyes. It seems that Mira will say something. My father is dead, he will not give me any consolation about this. Mira knows this very well, I do not flinch at anyone's peace in my moments of great hardship. Mira will say something else.
I noticed that in the corner of Mira's eye water was starting to accumulate. This time it seemed to me that Mira was really trying to say something that she was having a hard time saying! He can't stay without telling me again!
- Masood, I will go to my village tomorrow. I don't know when I will return. Maybe I will never return to this city. I will miss you so much!
Mira hid her face on the other side saying 'I will miss you very much'. Mira couldn't hold herself back anymore. Prachanda hugged me very tightly crying! I felt a little unprepared. Is it Mira?
Suddenly Mira pulled herself away from me. I did not understand the reason for Mira's crying! At some point in his life, when he felt a lot of things, he said, 'I understand something, I don't understand these things!' These are to be avoided. I did not avoid it, I thought about it again!
- Will you take me a little further?
Mira will leave this city, it started to feel a little bad now! The body began to tremble! I left Maruf in the hospital and tried to move Mira forward.
- Come on.
I am walking with Mira in the light of the lamp post in the street. Mira is not talking. I am also walking quietly. Mira is already beautiful. Mira looks unique in the light of the lamppost! I looked in the mirror a little. Mira looked up. Eye to eye. I turned away. I looked to the front and started walking.
Mira may not know yet, the first love of my life .. the feeling of first love was just seeing her! Mira will never know about the mountain of love that I have created for so many years! At this moment an incident of school life came to mind. This is one of the most memorable events of my life so far!
Then the class dragged on. Naturally, there was not much talk with any girl in the class. Not with Mira! Suddenly one day, during the break, I came to the class from outside and saw Mira sitting on a bench by the window .. looking outside. I went and stood in front of him. I stared at him for a while. Mira did not frown! I pulled up a bench .. Mira came to one side and sat down. This time Mira is a little shaken. He looked at me once, then at the outside. This time I stood up again! I went in front of the mirror! I grabbed his hand with a tug! He looked a little surprised, but did not say anything! I let go of my hand .. I sat down and put my hand on Mira's hand again. Mira did not say anything. I tried a lot to talk. I said a couple of jokes, I did not see any frown in the mirror!
I still remember that moment of half an hour of laughing at Mira and talking to me! After thousands of attempts to talk to Mira in school life, I couldn't say a word .. Mira embraced me a little while ago and cried!
Thinking about all this, I did not notice that I had come near Mira's house. Mira is still crying! I can hear the sound of crying! I can't stand this crying.
- Masood, come on. Be well Take care of yourself, eat properly. Don't go out at night. And if you can, come home to the village with the struggle! And ...
Mira stopped saying that. It's late at night. My village house, Mira's house in the next village! Not too far. Fifteen minutes walk. We have a small house in the village. Dad used to go to that house from time to time. Ever since I entered college, I have not been to my village home.
- All right, Mira. Let's go. It's late at night, go home and eat and sleep.
Mira crossed the gate crying and entered the house. He looked back once. I still saw tears in my eyes. Mira went inside the house. I then stood there for a while.
It's a little over eleven at night. I started walking towards the purpose of the hospital. Along the way we met with struggle. Cole is still her younger sister. Sangram looked at me with wide eyes. I didn't say anything. I started walking. Sangram started walking with me. The struggle on the way said nothing. I heard the sound of crying. The struggle is crying! Why is the struggle crying?
When I reached the hospital, I saw that Maruf and everyone else had completed all the formalities of the hospital, paid all the bills and were sitting for me. An ambulance was taken. I called Hafez Sahib from the mosque next to my house, performed Janaza and started taking my father's frozen body to the graveyard. Maruf probably told someone here that he had arranged for his father's grave right next to his mother's grave. After burying my father's body and passing Sangram to Maruf, I left for home. I saw some of his girlfriends sitting next to his younger sister. Brought food. But my sister is absolutely devastated. Nothing to eat. I went to wash my hands and face to ask him to eat. I came and saw my sister lying down. His girlfriends are gone by then. I will leave this city tomorrow. Both parents will be in this city, not just me! I fell asleep thinking about all this.
I woke up in the morning and saw that my sister was ready. Mira and I will leave this city today, I will leave. Ready, I went out with my younger sister. I went to the station and met Maruf. Maruf put some money in his pocket. I hugged everyone including Maruf once, cried a little!
After a while I got on the bus with my younger sister! Before getting on the bus, Maruf did another shot! He put a touchscreen mobile in one of the pockets of my bag and gestured to me to shut up .. He told me to leave the mobile!
I said nothing more. I sat down with my sister and sat down. The bus left. At first it was moving at a slow speed and after a while it started moving at a fast speed.
It was about four-thirty in the afternoon to reach the village house. The village environment is much the same as before. There has been some improvement from before. Roads have also improved a lot. There is a lot of rubbish in the house. After clearing all the rubbish with his younger sister, the village house was tidied up and it was almost evening. After coming to the village after so many days, many people came to our house. Now the sister is not alone. It was good to see my sister mingling with an older sister in the house next door. I felt a little calm in my mind. In the meantime, Rahim's uncle from the next house came and told me not to do any shopping for the next one week. He went through many more accessories including rice, pulses. I went out a little. I am walking on the village road after a long time. I met many acquaintances. I wanted to see Mira a little. Even then I did not go to their village. I came back home. Going home to the kitchen was quite a surprise! I saw Mira helping her younger sister with her mother to cook.
Mira's mother has known me for a long time. In a word, my acquaintance with Mira's mother is from that school life. Quite a good relationship with Mira's mother. But after leaving secondary school, communication was not maintained. Mira's mother saw me. I came to my room and sat down. Mira's mother also came. The parents are dead. He probably heard it from Mira. He told me a lot of soothing words! At one point, Mira's mother pulled me to her chest like her own son and began to turn her hand on my head! I remembered my own mother! I tried so hard and couldn't hold myself back. I cried. Except for my mother, I have never received so much affection from anyone! Mira's mother forbade me to cry .. went to the kitchen again. I leaned a little on the bed and lay down.
After a while Mira came to the room. I turned off the lights in the room and lay down. Mira came and turned on the lights. I didn't even get up to go to bed. Mira has given Kajal to her eyes today. Blue bangle with blue sari and fall! I looked once, never again. Lower middle class people don't have to fall for anyone.
Mira came and sat next to me. He surprised me a little and put it on my head! I got up!
- Hey! Why are you afraid? I am!
After hearing this from Mira, I looked at Mira again, this time not for long. Mira started rubbing her head on my head. But no talking.
- Mira, you look so beautiful!
As soon as she said this, Mira left the room crying. I did not try to understand anything.
After a while, everyone, including Mira's mother, ate together. Mira's mother went home. When our village house was small, it had three rooms. The kitchen was different.
After a while the elder sister of the house next door came .. wanted to know about my younger sister. How far have you studied, what will you do now? Finally Apu said that we have a kindergarten school in this village, which she is in charge of. I said you can give Mira a job as an assistant teacher there! The intermediate side was not done. I thought a lot, then my sister said that if you want to marry her in a good family, the first thing to look for is education and job nowadays. My younger sister attends kindergarten with special consideration on the advice of older sister. Now I have to do something. I spoke with a few well-known dignitaries of the village, who were very close to my father. With their help, I joined a secondary school in Mirader village as a part-time English teacher. I did not stay here for long. Leaving that job, I joined another kindergarten in the same village as an assistant teacher. Almost many are familiar.
This is how the day began to end. The younger sister cooks in the morning, then comes back in the afternoon to cook. This is how the life of two siblings started.
In between, I often met Mira. We used to talk a little. I opened a Facebook ID named 'Masud R Rahman' with the touchscreen mobile given by Maruf. There is no mystery of 'R' in the name.
A few months passed. Almost everything became normal. The seasons changed. Winter has come. I bought a sheet for my younger sister and also bought one myself. One day by mistake .. I left my mobile at home and went to school. When I came back I found out if Mira had come. He sat in my room for a long time. That night I kept Mira's mother's number. I will call with the mobile, then I see the mobile data on! I logged in to Facebook! 'Mira Ma' I received a notification that my request has been accepted from this ID! I did not send a friend request to anyone! Moreover, the name is mysterious! 'Mira Ma' is a name!
I checked the message box and saw several messages from that ID. Immediately after the message, I realized that it was a mirror ID. When he came home, he may have sent a request from my ID to his ID!
Tuktak started talking to Mira on Facebook. I never let him know my inner bloody feelings. Almost every day I started talking to Mira on Facebook. In the meantime, I quit my job at Mirader's village kindergarten and joined my village's kindergarten. The big sister next door was quite happy!
My meeting with Mira almost stopped. I began to feel a lot of emptiness. JK sat down again at night!
A few days later .. the elder sister of the house next door brought a wedding for my sister. After hearing all, I wanted to know the opinion of the sister. I surprised my sister and asked, 'Do you love anyone?'
The sister did not do it easily. I hurriedly fixed the date of the wedding day! The money given by my friend Maruf will be useful now. Married in a very unpretentious way. My sister's fate is pretty good. As educated as the boy is, the use is also quite elegant. Lives outside the country. There is a researcher at a university in London! On the wedding day, my sister hugged me and cried a lot!
A few months after the marriage, I found out that her husband would leave the country with his sister. My sister leaves me, never agrees to go so far. I understood him a lot. The sister agreed. Just a few days later he left the country. Every moment when I go out of the country, he calls me. Morning, afternoon, night. Whether I have eaten or not. Don't stay up late. The way my mother used to keep me safe, my sister is keeping me safe even after I left the country! What could be bigger than a life without parents?
I logged in to Facebook and saw that the mirror ID was de-activated! The next morning I went to Mirader village. I found out that they have left the country! I could not think of anything else! I started to feel bad emptiness! Going away from the mirror is hurting me a lot!
(After three years ...)
A lot has happened in these three years. My younger sister has a daughter. Whose name has been kept in my choice. Coincidentally, the younger sister's husband's name and my name was the same! 'Masood' !! I named my younger sister's daughter 'Mimsha Masud Isha'. My favorite name. There is one more, 'Mehrab Masood Nijhum'! These two names are Mira's favorite! One day while talking on Facebook, he told me these names! But, little sister does not know this matter!
That day was also a winter morning. I went out for a walk on the moon. I came to see the doctor last week. I did a lot of testing. Both kidneys have been damaged! I have also been diagnosed with brain cancer. No worries about this are working in me. Maybe I don't have much time left on earth!
I came to a halt in front of Mira's village house! I saw a girl in a sheet coming towards me. Probably Mirai! I moved forward!
- How are you, Masood?
- That's it .. Alhamdulillah: I'm fine. Are you ok
Mira avoided this question of mine!
- Why are you in this condition? What happened to you
- Actually Mira ....
I couldn't finish the whole thing. I immediately saw Mira running after a two or three year old child! I fixed the spectacles. Mira will be in pain if she sees my tears .. I took the glasses in my eyes thinking that Mira will not be able to see from outside if she sheds tears with her glasses. I saw Maruf coming out of Mira's house! Mira's husband is my friend Maruf! I came home from there.
I wandered around all day and went home at nine o'clock at night and went to bed without eating anything! Very sleepy!