Was there ever a time in your life when you questioned God's rightness in everything?
I am guilty of such.
When I had my second child, she seemed so calm and peaceful. She's not one to fuss nor to make amok around the house.
She cries when hungry, of course, or when she poops or pees. That's the usual for kids. Nothing out of the ordinary.
Then when she was about one year and 8 months old, something changed in her. She spins around while lying and bumps her head on the floor. I never really understood the things she does.
Of course, they were red flags.
And her speech, my goodness, she won't talk anymore.
And many developmental challenges were very flagrantly displayed.
I didn't know autism, I didn't know that it could happen to me or to my newly created family.
I believe myself to be God-fearing, to be a devout to God.
I came to question God's mercies and love for me as my child grew and it became difficult everyday to see her incapable of speech and seeing her self-harm.
That was one of the saddest moment of my life.
To see my own child with disability.
"why God, are you sure you're right in giving her to me?"
All those years of questioning left me in pain, struggling while dealing with my other kids and my husband.
My personal torments as well, while juggling freelancing on the side.
Then it dawned on me, who else should God give her to?
If not to me, to whom?
No one could love her like I do.
No one could take care of her like I do.
No one could understand her more than me.
And these realizations made me accept, that God is never wrong.
I'm learning everyday to deal with life's uncertainties which I'm sure you are too.
God loves us!
“For by Him all things were created; things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by Him and for Him.” Colossians 1:16, NIV