Trigger Warning: Suicide. Read at your own risk.
“The broken heart. You think you will die, but you keep living, day after day after terrible day.” —Charles Dickens
I read somewhere that if you are not ready to die everyday, don't fall in love. So does this mean that love kills? I cannot believe that love is a. . .killer.
Suicide has become apparent year after year. Studies show that in United States, suicide is the top 10 cause of death of the people. There is really a complicated way to determine the reason behind suicide or suicide attempts unless the suicidal person reveals the cause of it through letters or other means.
According to the study of BMC Public Health held in the Philippines, ages of those who commit suicides ranges from 15 to 24 year old for both male and female. I am not being assuming but these are the ages where people begin to reach puberty and understand their sexual desires and commit into romantic relationships. And so it is true, the results showed that family and relationship problems are the main cause behind it.
Love can be a silent killer, indeed. People dealing with failed relationships, physical abuse and break-ups are commonly prone to emotional and psychological risks that most often lead to suicidal attempts when it is not dealt with the proper medication or action of those involved with the conflict.
There is a Theory of Attachment that can support why romantic relationships can lead to serious mental health risks. Attachment or bond is said to be a deep emotional bond when someone feels connected to the other person like a child's connection to his/her mother. When adults seek for someone's care and affection like an infant and undergoes a serious separation anxiety when they experience that the other person is slowly drifting away. The scary part is, this can be likely one-sided.
Loving someone most likely give the people sense of identity. Especially long-term relationships, love is an unbreakable bond between lovers that the sense of identity and security are so strong once it is broken will bring total mess. Broken-hearted people who experience termination of relationships become vulnerable, lost and chaotic inside. They feel too burdened and that's when they have a hard time finding their own sense of identity without the other person. That's when they are exposed to morbid ideas and depression.
I am not saying that broken-hearted people are always depressed. It is a matter on how they cope up with the heartache. The healing process is the valuable step to overcome such risk of suicide. People who seek help and guidance to their loved ones are most likely to get over faster. Getting over someone can be very slow but dealing with the grief through acceptance is the best thing to do.
Love starts with the feeling of familiarity. It may be romantic or just love for family and loved ones. When you have that feeling of ease and comfort to someone, you are in the verge of loving him/her. But it is not that simple. Familiarity is high maintenance that it requires time, trust and experience along with that person. Being with someone for a long time, sharing stories and memories together, how can you not spare a space for them in your heart?
Healthy relationships should be our goal and not the toxic version where 'lovers' feel upset, hatred and destroy one another instead of building them up. This is also a dangerous kind of love. The hate disguised as love. This is like a poisonous drug that slowly kills the inside of someone.
Look at you now. Are you dead? No. Because love of all kinds should strengthen us and not the other way around. It should motivate us to be happy and to live happily. Love is a powerful weapon that makes us want to live more.
Above all, God's love is never dangerous. It is freeing and passionate. It is the foundation of all types of love. We must first seek the Love and Presence of God to complete us. His love fills us with happiness no one can give but Him.
When love becomes dangerous, let go of it.
Study that supports this article:
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/media-spotlight/201711/how-dangerous-is-broken-heart
You mentioned the saying that if you are not ready to die everyday, do not fall in love. I bet this isn't true. You know you really love the person if u found a reason to be alive or more alive. This is just based on my opinion.
Most teenagers nowadays think what they're feeling is true love. They give everything. They love too deep. And heartache put them on the edge of being suicidal, indeed. It really depends on the capacity of one's mind.