May I Ask You Not to Go? Sit here. We're Talking About Everything That's Been Gone

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Avatar for saepuloh
3 years ago

.Two empty coffee cups lined up between the two of us. Java Arabica and Hazelnut Latte. The coldness of your gaze now has never been greater than the chill of the night air.

It's still hard to believe that we're both at this point, talking about everything we've ever done. I can read your behavior clearly. Your cell phone that doesn't stop ringing, your eyes that look at your watch every minute, and your heavy sighs seem to indicate that all of this feels so meaningless. I know you really want to get out of my sight. But at least listen to my request even if it's just pretend for you.

I want you to stay here. Accompany me until the night turns

Do not leave me. Don't you know how much I need you right now? It's not that I force you to always be by my side, but I've never loved a man so deeply. Our parting left only a few scratches that hurt more and more every time I felt tired.

I feel like I want to be here forever. Enjoying cup after cup of coffee with you that always adorns the heart. Seeing your smile is the thing I enjoy the most after this cup of coffee. I don't know why that smile no longer seems to greet me, and I can only wonder what's wrong...

Can you try to remember how we were related? I hope the memory still vividly fills the heart

Let's remember for a moment the time when we first met. It was a cold afternoon, as cold as today. When your gaze meets mine from across the street my regular coffee shop. Ah it turned out that you were with a friend of mine, without hesitation you came to me and joined me. It felt like that afternoon was too precious to me, somehow with you. We spent the afternoon together peppered with jokes inviting laughter which finally made us greet each other via voice the next day. And until we finally realize that the taste we have is the same.

It feels really torturous if we stop fighting while the world is still spinning beautifully

We can only swallow anger. I fill envy, you spit for sure, all about promises. On that day, we both folded words and left bruises in our eyes, for each other. There are so many memories that are still etched in my brain. I don't know, sometimes I really want to forget it when the memories suddenly fall freely into my mind. On the other hand, I don't want to just forget about it. How about you, honey? Then it all ended without me being able to control how it was supposed to go. I was blown away so hard when the wave came unexpectedly. I, who should have remained in our world, was now thrown back into the dark world. Silent and silent. And you, stay in your world. The distance is so far between us. I can't even hear your voice anymore. I want you to stay here. Accompany me to finish cup after cup of coffee that tastes increasingly meaningless

Didn't you ever tell me that you would always accompany me? Fill the days with many meaningful things. I never thought that one of the things that meant so much to both of us was this really suffocating farewell. For the umpteenth time, I have to learn to let go. Learn to let go. Learn that our story will be silent in eternity. I want so badly to hug you and beg you to stay and never disappear. But our relationship seems hopeless. When one of us starts trying to force ourselves to hold on, only regret will come. Dark clouds hung in the sky as far as the eye could see. But the rain didn't stop falling. Sometimes the wind blows. I don't know what to conspire with. And I have to force myself to look at the shadow of your back that is getting farther and farther away. Maybe I can say everything easily but still this silence is the most beautifulI

cried, not because you left. But because I began to understand, that there is a part of you that will not be replaced. I cried because that's how I let go. Let go of hope that may never be felt. Evaporating all the feelings that have now turned into signs. How everything is so dear to me to throw away and disappear. I could still insist that you are always there, but no. Even though I could easily make you come back again, still this silence is the most beautiful. Goodbye, may we both find a more awesome path.

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Avatar for saepuloh
3 years ago

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