When I reached the age of reason, how I wished that my feet will slip on a pair of beautiful slippers that was a fad at that time. I have seen many walking joyously and proud to have those pair. My wish was only a wish for we could not afford it. All my mother would say "as long you are not in barefoot its okay".
But there are times I don't have to slip on my feet for my mother could not immediately replace the worn-out slippers due to financial reason so, I have to go out in the house for an errand in a nearby store barefooted. To be in that situation is something to be ashamed of, why to be in bare feet while others have something in their feet. Aside from that, it is not easy, the burning heat of asphalt of the road so painful in my delicate skin, something a child could not endure. Sometimes I could step on thorns and have a cracked heels. The foremost is getting parasites out of the soil. That is why most children have bloated stomachs for there are children even they have slippers won't wear it especially the younger ones.
Sometimes, I ask myself why we are poor while the others have everything in their grasp. Well provided when it comes to material needs in their bodies. While me, just a pair of slippers is so difficult to obtain.
As we grow and went to school, we were already provided with shoes and slippers, and how my mama stretch her meager salary just to be fair with us all siblings, to have each pair of shoes and slippers. The sizes are in 1 inch bigger than the real size of our feet, to give an allowance, a room for growing of our feet, for she calculates that it could still be used for the next year. She made it right for the shoes is still new, never worn because slippers was usually used in going to school. All the school children at that time uses slippers than shoes, for it is easy to slip on and comfy, and during on children's play slippers are of great use. There are many games could be created with slippers. The shoes will be only use during scouting and any special activities in the school or graduation time.
When high school begin, is the beginning of awakening. I am now again awake of how poor we are, for the slippers were no longer the trend, it is the shoes. I have shoes but when compared with the others mine is outdated, out of fashion, and being young inferiority is inevitable. I begin to develop an insecurity complex, thus, I'm easily be intimidated by others, losing self confidence and self-esteem.
Then I remembered the time, I am asking my mother the beautiful slippers which we cannot afford. Remembering her words "as long as you are not in bare foot it is okay", and I as look around I am not alone, there are many of us on the same situation. So, I am back to reality and tell myself I am here to study not to show what I cannot have, but to take whatever knowledge and wisdom a school could give.
The slippers are the reminder, the poking rod on my head to strive in my studies, to be good and must graduate if not in honors but with presentable grades, for it is my ticket to land a good job. In the last semester of my course, my mind was already wandering where to find a job, to whom will I go for help, for I am confident to pass the semester and be able to graduate making my mother proud of me.
The rest is history, thank God I have made it, and I am already the one providing my mother her needs be it medicines, slippers, shoes, birthday celebrations, anything that I could show my gratitude for the hard and struggling years of taking care for all of us.
Today recalling those days of wanting a beautiful slipper makes me smiled. Having an ipanema, havaianas and grenhda slippers is not the ultimate joy and to be proud of, it is no longer my wants in life. As I mature, I realize that things are just a paraphernalia that the happiness it gives is passing, short live, and not everlasting. The ultimate happiness is, is sharing our blessings, of giving slipper to those who needs most and I have done it, not physically because of time constraint but financially.
It is our high school batch project that I love most among the many projects. At this time of pandemic it was put on hold, maybe when our life will be back to normal we will resume. It is a nice feeling to be able to share and help to those who really needs help, the rightful beneficiary.
