@remona 19 September 2022 more from that month

Right where I left my heart! My heart was itching to say goodbye I knew there would be no comeback in probably many years. I said goodbye a thousand times but still, it felt less. Leaving away so much green, the happy faces, the noise, and the crowd-free place made me feel like I was losing something.

*I'm talking about my last visit to my aunt's place, the countryside. Living in a city years after years and having the chance to visit such a place felt such a blessing. My eyes didn't see so much green in years. Maybe I didn't get to sit next to the river for a decade. Seeing the wide blue sky, the playful cloud, and the whole surrounding feels like another universe!* It was only a two days visit but the memories we will be cherished for an extended period, we know that in our hearts. People who live there may find the place as usual. But for us, who live in cities for years; it was like a haven. I know the argument, there are not many facilities as cities in the countryside, life is boring there, I would complain if I stayed long. You know what? I agree with all of this. I know the amusement feeling is temporary but that's not anything 'less' to have, right?

When we were coming back to the city, I was thinking when will be another 'next time that I would say, the road was traffic free. Probably not in another few years, huh? Life!! Sometimes (most of the time in reality) I get to think, why have we made our city so unlivable? The noise, traffic, pollution, and crowd of Dhaka are something else. Looking at this fresh picture, you wouldn't say I'm talking about the same country. It truly pisses me off thinking how difficult we made our life just by saying goodbye to nature and building the worst unplanned city. Here, every breath costs! I wish I could go back and take a few fresh breaths again. I know, I left a portion of me there and I will search for that in my soul forever until I go back!