Adults are the submission of childhood experiences!

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1 year ago

I was listening to a family abuse survivor the other day. Her life story is full of struggles but fortunately, she is doing fine now. Her family used to beat her, and mentally torture her because of marrying someone they didn't like. Also, the man was a poor choice which she understands later, he cheated on her and used to beat her as well. She married two more times later and left both of them because of different abuses.

When she managed to come over every struggle and build a positive lifestyle, now she is able to see what makes her do mistakes in life. And with no surprise, she was saying her behavior is just a reflection of childhood experiences as she was always a neglected child, she was never loved, and all.

Though I agree with the concept that adults reflect on what they have learned throughout their childhood, it makes a huge impact on how a person behaves. However, I have a different opinion on this. We can always make room to learn what is right and improve ourselves. It's never possible to forget what you have been through. But it's up to us to make the right decision next.


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There is a high chance of getting my words wrong. So let me clear that up a little more.

If we choose to blame our childhood experiences for our current mistakes then we ourselves shut the door to improve. There's no place to deny, what we have gone through, those are facts that we can not change. Acceptance and moving on are hard than anything but necessary. We can learn from the experience about how wrong things happened to us but that's never an excuse to make poor choices.

There's no room for victim blaming or pointing out what they did wrong. There's no argument about how difficult it is to unlearn negative things and keep apart the experiences. There will always be some reflection of what we have gone through. But at the end of the day, it's up to us how we can proceed in the future.

That's all I want to say.

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1 year ago

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And also it is common for abused to fall for the first person to show kindness... Sometimes we couldn't categorize kindness from other motives coz it's what we've been craving for...for so long

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1 year ago

I totally agree with you on this point. We do mistakes but we should be able to see where we are going or people taking us.

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1 year ago

I strongly believe that we are shaped by our experience. It's either made us weak or strong. It's inevitable and out of our hands...like me who came from abuse it is a very hard and very long battle but as they say there's silver lining in everything...you just have to know where to look

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1 year ago

I can't judge her for choosing the wrong person and getting married. because when a person does not receive love from his family, he is with the person who shows him the slightest sign of love. so he needs love and wants to meet it

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1 year ago