Life

Oh, to run away from this ghastly life is a desire; to start over in a foreign land where everything is unusual, everyone is a stranger, and no one knows me by name. Perhaps it would make the aching a little more bearable if I were in a new environment away from all the things that are killing me here.

Oh, I long to not be here; to not be born; and to not be me. Perhaps I’d learn to love myself if I were in someone else’s skin and my existence would make a tiny sense to the world.

Oh, to be unbothered and unaware of life is what I want; to be reckless and to care less about the future ahead, and to live only for the present. Perhaps then I wouldn’t feel inadequate and pressured. I wouldn’t mind missing and running out of time. Perhaps life would be more joyful than agonizing.

If only humans weren't endowed with the highest level of consciousness, perhaps life wouldn't be so complicated and I wouldn’t be wishing to vanish tonight.