Suicide note

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Tuptap tears, the pages of the diary are soaked. The water and the ink of the pen have become monotonous. What was written is not going to be read well. The writings are gradually becoming clear.

The frozen body of Navani hanging with the ceiling fan.

What a surprise! The young woman who used to run to see me (Anab) would increase her back pain in Kilghushi, she used to plan all the naughty things she did all day. Sometimes she used to do sleeping routine instead of reading routine. Navani was my best friend. I couldn't believe my ears when I heard the news of her death. When I came and saw her hanging body, I still couldn't believe my eyes. Surely she was joking ... The girl who called last night also talked about one plan after another. He said. He has brought thousands of complaints against me. He is no more today! Not really? I feel like the biggest criminal in the world today. I haven't met the girl for a long time due to lack of time. There were thousands of complaints against me. It would be wrong to say I didn't have time, there was plenty of time. But the quarrel with Neela was such that I was not in a position to meet. I was very busy with myself. I know why my mind did not find time for him. A huge distance was created between us with the change of time. I am not old enough to understand how bad the distance between friendships is. How much do you have any idea about the distance at the age of 16? I could not hold back the tears. , On the table, in the chair, on the sofa, every naughty thing, Aunty's gossip.

Suddenly I saw the diary lying on the table. I turned the page and saw the funny things happening every day.

On every page of the beautifully written diary. All the facts floated before my eyes. One by one I turned the pages to find the words of pain in the midst of joy.

Then ... then ...

The suicide note he wrote touched my heart.

He wrote ...

"I know why I feel so helpless today. The world doesn't feel the same as before. What a distance between everyone! I didn't want the distance that broke someone's heart. I didn't want the distance that my parents had. Fighting with that brother, Chulachuli was a daily routine, I could not live a moment without friends. Why so far today? Does time change people like this? Or does the human mind change with time?

It's raining outside,

I left the window open

The wind is blowing

With a drop of rain

Yet I know why no feeling is working in me. Or how? Today, that naughty, smiling girl is sitting on the table of distance without looking at the table of mischief. How beautiful those days were really.

Rafiq Sir, Ajay Sir's private end of the audible, evening, walking to talk with Anab. We were one of a kind quality. Sometimes someone's five-faced praise never fails ...

Isn't it really how fast time passes?

Those days seem to be yesterday. The journey is over so quickly! I have to feel their distance so quickly! Today it seems that everything in the world is gone from me, there is nothing left.

There is no time to chat for hours, no one.

I can't stand anyone's neglect at all. The pain of neglect has hurt me a little more than the pain of distance.

I grew up alone since I was a child, my parents used to work. I was not in a position to understand the good and the bad. The people I wanted to love have gone away, floated away in the flow of time. Did not rise but increased day by day. I was always anxious to get a little love and care from everyone, but I didn't find anyone beside me in the day of trouble. Even though I was miserable, I could never open my mind and say anything to anyone. The mind has plunged into another world.

Today he is very eager to talk to everyone. But everyone is busy like everyone else. Today I called Anab to tell him about the troubles hidden in the depths of my mind. Does he have time to listen to me anymore? He is busy with his own thoughts. Incomplete words said. I put the phone on the bed. There is no one to give me a little time. In the middle of all the mountains are equally busy. There was a daily quarrel between the parents for no reason. I can't stand it anymore. How much longer will a man endure?

Believe me, I can't explain to anyone how much I am in trouble because I am so lonely. Who understands the pain of others, no one has the time to understand the pain of others. Why is time so desperate? Why doesn't anyone understand time? It seems that all the troubles of the world have overwhelmed me.

I'm not even trying to leave.

I remember death very much today, as if death is someone very close to me. Death seems to be the scent of the evening malt, in the fragrance of which I am intoxicated.

The diary page is over. I (Anab) did not know the incomplete words. His new plans are not known. The time that gave me the opportunity to mix with a madman like Navani, that time took him away today. All around was blurred. I could see with those blurred eyes, the beautiful face of Navani with a smile. After death, everyone seems beautiful. He said in a low voice,

"Janis Anab! Death was circling around like a scoundrel, but I didn't step on it at all. Someone dragged me and made me stand in the chair. My parents were in the next room. I was shouting at them but they didn't hear me. They were arguing like themselves." The two of them did it. I became numb with fear. I rolled the fly around my neck and dropped it on my throat again. It seemed as if a lover was reading a garland of flowers. Didn't I feel happy? Suddenly, the chair moved away from under his feet. The joy, mischief and mischief that grew from small to big floated in front of his eyes. It was very difficult to breathe. His parents were busy arguing so he could not hear anything. Please don't fight anymore ". But the git didn't stick so hard in my throat, I was groaning in pain. I wanted to live in the midst of neglect and pain. But I couldn't. I was having a hard time. Once I met my eyes to see this beautiful world. Believe me, I saw nothing but gray darkness before my eyes.

The death that I thought was better due to the urgency of time, the urge to distance, the negligence that caused me to float in the distant blue sky today. Took with me some incomplete words.

"Many things remained incomplete.