Anxiety is an emotion associated with an imaginary threat. Unlike fear associated with something that is scary at the moment, anxiety arises when a person imagines different situations that he perceives as threatening his well-being.
Anxiety in children can arise about relationships with parents, siblings and other relatives, about relationships with classmates, and how the child is judged (considered "cool" or not). Children can be afraid of animals, heights and insects, of course one of the most common anxieties associated with fear of the dark. In this case, anxiety and fear act together as one front, darkness sets in, it becomes scary, and disturbing thoughts come to mind, but what if ... Imagination is a powerful resource that you can use to your advantage and use to cope with anxiety. This can be helped by the techniques that I constantly use in my work.
Together with your child, you can make a special box or casket that will be a place to store the alarm. The child can write some words on this box, paste pictures, or draw something. This may be a ready-made box, it is important that it is intended for storing an alarm. Once the child's anxiety levels have subsided, it will be difficult to disassociate the box with the anxiety, and it will remind of the anxiety. How to use this box / casket.
1. Choose a place for it.
If the child is afraid of the dark, then it is better not to put the box in his / her room, but, for example, to take it to the kitchen. It is necessary that this storage of anxiety is not under the nose all the time, but stands in a place where the child is not constantly.
2. Come up with a form for the notes.
The idea of working with anxiety with the help of such a box is that at the moment when the child starts to worry, he / she will need to take a piece of paper, it can be an ordinary piece of paper, or a piece from a special disturbing notebook, and write or draw something, which is alarming. For example, you can write your thought, say, I'm afraid that a monster will come out of the darkness and eat me. There are children who find it easier to write, and there are those who love to draw. It is important that the form of expression of anxiety - writing, drawing, maybe sculpting - suits your child.
3. Put the note in the box / casket.
The next step is to take the note and go put it in the box. You can do this with the words: "Anxiety, thank you for coming, but now you are bothering me, I have an important business - I need to sleep so that tomorrow it would be easy to get up in the morning." Thus, the child, as it were, takes out his anxiety, gives it a shape, and removes it to where it will no longer bother him.
4. Talk to an adult.
Working with the anxiety box is best accompanied by a daily conversation with a calm adult who is able to listen, understand and support the child, validate his feelings, and find additional ways to deal with anxiety. Such conversations are best planned, for example, every day at 6:15 pm, mom talks to her son about what he put in the box. It is very important to maintain in the child the understanding that anxiety, on the one hand, tries to protect him, and on the other hand, prevents him from being effective. It has both pluses and minuses, so we do not drive it away, but carefully ask us not to interfere.
Good luck to you!