My father brought me a present last night. I'll tell you what, I'm surprised. My mother almost swallowed her little tongue in surprise. Because my father doesn't buy presents for anyone, even on birthdays.
New toys are normally inside the boxes. And the robot my father brought me came out of a grocery bag. Like a magician, my father turned the robot around, put it on the ground, and started it. It wasn't even half a meter tall, but the robot was pretty cool except that he walked with a limp.
"Who buys a lame robot for his child?" my mother said.
"The important thing is the robot's brain. This model is smarter than you and me," my father said.
"He's smarter than you," my mother said. I think mom and dad are missing a few things in their heads. It's hard to say which is crazier because they compete in different categories. I mean, the robot could really be smarter than all of us.
After the Robot limped around the hall a little, he asked, "Who owns me, who will I serve?"
I'll tell you what, I was scared. I said," I own you, and you have to do what I want, or I'll take your batteries out."
"What is your name, master?" the robot asked.
"My name is Mert. I'm good at everything but classes, and your name is Ozi."
"I wish your classes were good, too," my mother said.
"I asked the little gentleman for his opinion," he said. My mother was shocked by this attitude because, normally, she is the one who gets angry with people.
"I don't like robots that say the wrong things to my mother," I said. My robot looked at me with its head turned up, its lame foot trembled, and it fell to the ground.
"That's what your father gets," my mother said.
"The battery is dead, you take it to your room and charge it, and I'll go out and check on our kids," my father said.
I took the robot to my room, charged it, and started playing war games on the computer. About eight o'clock, my friend Samet reminded me that my mother will be there soon to ask about my homework. Giving children homework for summer holidays is a violation of human rights.
I took Ozi off the charge, put him on my knee, and asked him if he could help me with my homework.
"I can help, but I won't," he said.
"You have to do what I say," I said, exasperated.
"Do you wonder how my leg got crippled?" he asked.
I said," You have to help me with my homework, or I'll give you back."
"I'm a fearless robot, so my leg is crippled," he said.
I didn't have time to argue with him, I had to do my homework, and after I put on my pajamas, I took my robot in front of me and said, "Let's talk to you, man to man." Every time my father wanted to give me advice, he said that.
"I ran away from my previous home. They were bad people," Ozi said.
"Did they hurt someone?"
"They threw me in front of the baby tiger in the house as if I were a toy."
"But you're a toy.”
"I'm a toy for children, not for tiger cubs. But your father is a good man. When I asked him to take me, he didn't object."
"Did the tiger cub hurt your leg?"
"No, the man who owned the tiger shot me in the foot with his pistol."
I said," I'll go and kick his ass later." We have a gang of 10-and 11-year-olds in the neighborhood, and we're getting more dangerous with each passing year.
"It's a disgrace that they walk freely outside," my robot said.
"You're actually their property. But the beach is not their property. According to coastal law, we can go to sea wherever we want. If they see you, they'll take you back. So you shouldn't leave the house.”
"You're a knowledgeable child. But you're wrong. I'm a smart robot. And I'm nobody's property. Smart people are free.”
"They bought you with money. Just like they took the baby tiger. Robots like you and baby tigers are expensive. Just like the villas, whose garden is almost the size of this site.”
"The world is very complicated. I don't think the training they gave us in the simulation environment was enough. And they didn't show us a human being in the flesh.”
I said,” Tell me like I understand."
“They trained us in a simulation environment. Think of it as a video game. We learned life next to that virtual family in a digital environment. Of course, sometimes what I learned there isn't enough. I think it's wrong that there's no quality standard for people. The minds of robots, for example, who fail in education are erased and retrained…”
I didn't listen to the rest of what he said because my mind was stuck in a wasp that hit the window like a kamikaze. I gathered my courage and threw forward, and opened the window. And the little monster flew out the window. I was tired of the day. I said to my robot, “I don't like being spoken when I sleep,” and I went into my bed and closed my eyes.
When I woke up the next morning, a squad of robot soldiers on the floor of my room. I decided they were soldiers because they had rifles on their shoulders, and they were walking behind my lame robot.
"What's going on here, guys?” I asked.
"Friends climbed up the Ivy and went upstairs. As the window was open, I let them in.”
"I don't normally allow enemies to invade my room.”
“They are with me. It looks like something went wrong at the villa.”
A robot squad with weapons was a serious problem. As soon as they heard that, it was certain that my parents would start arguing.
”Don't let them show up too much, " I said, and I went downstairs for breakfast. My parents were having breakfast at the patio table, and when they saw me, they invited me to the table.
My mother cooked my egg apricot-like. But I want my egg fully cooked. When I told her that, she accused me of not being happy with anything. And I told her I was glad we came to the summer house. I think we should have come to this summer house every year.
"Your father arranged this place for free. I don't think we'll make it next year,” my mother said.
"Next year, maybe we'll go somewhere better,” my father said. He finished his breakfast, started smoking a cigarette.
"If he finds a free grave, he'll jump in it.”
"Everyone wants to do me a favor when I'm a loved one.”
"Now I'm bad because I'm not grateful to anyone. Nobody wants to do me any favors, huh?" my mother said.
"What's the matter, Canan, for God's sake," my father said.
I said,” If you're going to fight, I'll go to my room." Educating the elders is very difficult, even impossible; they never stop bickering about issues that will not fill the fig core.
"No, son, it is not a fight. We're talking," my father said.
“Now get up and change. Let's take our place on the beach before the sunbeds are snatched,” my mother said. As she said that, I heard chain snaps. I looked up and saw a big man approaching with two Dobermans. The man opened the garden door and went inside and said, “Mr. Danyal wants his relics back.” I could laugh at the man's face if I wasn't afraid of dogs because he looked like a grass man with steep hair on the top.
“Who is Mr. Danyal? We don't know anything about relics,” said My mother.
"We watched on camera. Robot soldiers crossed the garden wall of Danyal Bey's Villa and entered the garden of your cottage.”
"You'd better get your dogs out of our noses. We didn't see any robot soldiers.”
"I have anger management problems. If you deliver the robots, we can close the matter.”
“Nobody can compete with me when it comes to nervousness,” my mother said, and she jumped to her feet to show off her majestic torso.
In the face of this sudden movement, the Dobermans started barking at my mother. And we took a defensive position, standing up. He was trying to calm the Dobermans by pulling their chains, and my father was trying to prevent the dogs from attacking us by shouting, “hooray, hooray.”
A bang was heard behind us in all the confusion, and dust rose from the garden wall. At that moment, everyone turned and looked where the noise came from. Judging by the smoke coming out of its barrel, the sound of the explosion just came from a tank the size of a vacuum cleaner. As the Tank approached us, accompanied by pallet creaks, its lid opened, and my robot coming out of it said, “I made the shot at getting your attention. I think we can overcome this crisis by talking."
There was a brief silence in the garden as the man holding the Dobermans' chain froze. At this time, a second man entered through the garden door and said, “Ladies and gentlemen, I salute you all with respect; I am Danyal.”
"Welcome, my name is Ihsan," my father said.
Danyal was dressed in a white shirt and a magenta-colored linen jacket, contrasting with her brunette complexion, with a huge gold ring on her little finger. “Osman, take the dogs home if you want, so they don't get in the way in this mess,” he said as he moved confidently towards us.
”Have a seat, and we'll offer you a cup of tea, " my father said.
Danyal took the chair a few steps back from the table and sat down, leaned back, and said, “I don't want anything. I've drunk my tea.”
My robot Ozi pointed the barrel of the tank at Danyal and said, “Don't be fooled by his calm look. He's a psychopath.”
"We need to talk about this man-to-man, Canan, Mert, will you go inside?" my father said. "The robot in the tank appeared on the road yesterday morning. I've seen these models online, but I've never heard them talk. He asked me to take him home. And when his leg got hurt, I thought his owner probably threw him out on the street. I wouldn't have bought it if I knew it was valuable to you. If you ask about the tank he is in, it is a surprise to us."
Danyal leaned back and turned to Ozi and said, “Gather the team Zebercet, we're going.”
”My name is not Zebercet, and we don't have to do what you say, " Ozi said.
“Let the lady and the boy get in,” Danyal said as he pulled his gun. When we saw Danyal's silver gun shining brightly in the daylight, we froze like quails with headlights in their eyes. At that moment, none of us dared to get up from our seats and enter the house.
“Friends, we're in an offensive position,” Ozi said, seeing Danyal draw his pistol, and pulled into the tank, where he closed the lid. Danyal responded by standing up and turning his pistol towards the tank.
I had an opportunity to use my ability to meditate, and I was not going to run away from such a mission. ” Let's solve this by talking if you want, " I shouted. As soon as I said that, I bowed involuntarily because two fighter jets had passed over our heads. The planes were about a meter tall, and the bombs they carried under their wings were visible to the naked eye.
When Danyal saw the planes, he holstered his pistol, sat in his chair, pulled out his cell phone, and called someone. I waited for the end of the conversation and said, “Ozi, tell me your terms so that this conflict is over.”
“Danyal will provide the necessary spare parts for my leg and promise me that he will not shoot again,” Ozi said, opening the top cover of the tank and pulling his head out.
” It's easy; we'll handle it, " Danyal said.
"Danyal will also accept us all as free persons.”
"It is impossible. I paid a fortune to buy you,” said Danyal, and two men jumped from the garden wall in a row.
Ozi retreated back into the tank and said over the megaphone, “You'll deduct the money you gave us from our pensions.”
“What do they do?" my father asked, wondering.
” It's a trade secret; it's unspoken, " Danyal said.
“He will open a martial arts demonstration center, we will be working, but the gentleman will not make us smell shit,” Ozi said from the tank's megaphone.
"Do you know what I understood from this conversation? I will not be comfortable without killing Zebercet," Danyal said, drew his gun, and fired at the tank Ozi was in.
"Shooting in a residential area is a crime, sir, and I will report you to the prosecutor's office,” my mother said. Danyal's men, meanwhile, were slowly approaching us. My father grabbed my mother and Me by the arms and pushed me into the house because he had heard the sound of warplanes approaching. I couldn't watch the bombs go off like torpedoes in our garden, and at that time, my father and I were busy going upstairs. I could tell from the garden sounds that the robot soldiers had launched an attack on Danyal and his men. My father is thin, but his hands are strong as a vise. I mean, I couldn't get rid of him and see what was going on in the garden. My guess is that Danyal and his men walked away from the garden without daring to shoot a single bullet.
When the voices stopped, my mother turned to my father and said,” You don't bring nothing but trouble to this house."
“You know everything, don't you, Canan?" my father said.
” I wonder when you'll grow up, always fighting, always bickering, " I said.
In the following days, we heard that Danyal was in and out of prison and convinced his rebellious robots to take part in a martial arts show. When we got home from the summer house, we were surprised when Ozi came out of our car's trunk with our suitcases. Ozi convinced my mother to stay with us, and we had a lot of good times together.
