Confession of a New Mother

I’ve been distancing myself from the social media since I got pregnant. Not because I was ashamed but because I didn’t want the unnecessary drama to start. That was what I was thinking back then. I thought I’d never bear the comments from other people. And I thought I’d receive more criticism than compliments. I was not ashamed. I was afraid.

I was on the verge of my youthful years when I got pregnant and was married to the father of my child on my 5th month of pregnancy. I am happy with everything that has happened in my life even though it was not what I thought on how my life would unravel. But I guess that’s life - full of surprises.

For the nine months that I carried my little gift from God, I had it really tough on the first four months - headache, vomiting, nausea, and restlessness. I would sing song of praises and prayed to the heavens that I’d never want to get pregnant again. But everything that I had said during those times were completely different when I actually gave birth.

It took only three hours before this little angel greeted the world. I did not even make it to the delivery room and just gave birth on my labor room bed. It was fast that I didn’t think of anything. It was miraculous that I cried non-stop even during the cleaning. I was literally sleepless for days, weeks and months; not being able to completely snap back to reality.

I became a mother. I am now a mother. Still clueless. Still immature. Still lacking confidence. I still do not know if what I’m doing is actually what’s best for my child. I still wonder how other moms look effortlessly amazing at being a mother. I cry every night saying to myself that I should do better. I guess this is what’s postpartum depression is. I was having really hard time for the past months but now I have decided to take a break by writing back my emotions and finding comfort from other moms. And so it brought me here to read cash.

I was lost for awhile but now I think I am back to my track. This way I can learn from other people and I’d be able to share my struggles in the hopes to inspire others as well. J.K. Rowling said, “We are only as strong as we are united and as weak as we are divided.”

I thank all my family and friends who constantly checked on me during those darkest times. Also, I thank my husband for the love, understanding, patience, and faithfulness. Lastly, I thank everyone here in advance as I know I’d be having a great time here.

This is @missnikkabomb , and you’ll expect contents of motherhood, working mom, photography, and food journeys from me on this day onwards. I’d share basic “how to’s” and a lot of secrets of motherhood that I have learned so far.