Toxic friendships, are they worth it?

<A friend is not someone who wants to listen to your problems, it is someone who wants to help you solve them>

Since we are little we naturally seek to relate to others, always seeking to create links that in one way or another make us feel much better, as I said, these are things that our parents instilled in us when we were little, such as companionship, generosity, respect and empathy for others, are such basic aspects but that undoubtedly differentiate good people from those who are not, good people or now also called vitamin people because they are always there for you helping in whatever they can to solve and solve any reason or circumstance that afflicts us instead of not so good or toxic people, which is also a new name that has been imposed today because some are characterized by not hiding their bad intentions towards us and others but also there are those who are like wolves hidden in the form of sheep, whose desire will always be to see us badly or rather well but never better than them, they are personal Some people who, with a very subtle and even affectionate language, tell us that we cannot, that we are not capable or deserving, that instead of helping us raise our spirits and emerge they want to sink us, people who only put impediments and excuses to our solutions in a few words people who are part of the problem and not part of the solution.

With the passing of time, one only discovers and makes it a priority to put drama out of our lives, to always keep it at a distance, instead seeking peace and tranquility, in turn people who generate calm, instead of having exhaustive conflicts to because of those people who only steal our energy that we could well be putting into our personal projects instead of drama, just as there are friendships that fill our existence with happiness, joy, tranquility, calm, and peace of mind, there are those who, due to their toxicity they are not made to last forever in our lives, although on many occasions people only talk that things are going wrong for them in matters related to love and their sentimental situation, we can also find psychological abuse in friendly relationships, which only cause us emotional damage , because some are people we have known for a lifetime but with maturity we must face that they are relationships that we must cut healthily because that instead of flowing positively, it is doing it the other way around and, incidentally, negatively.

It is very easy to discover this type of friendship because they always live in victim mode and complaining about everything and nothing, they are always part of the problem, they never see solutions, and they even take everything very personally to heart that everything that happens is always for them. , with the aim of making you feel bad, can also be referred to as a form of emotional manipulation. Always instead of helping you overcome any insecurities you have, they point them out, inevitably tearing you to shreds and obviously making you feel bad for their out of place comments, which they do only with the intention of hurting, as well as constantly and even when the occasion warrants it. A very common one is that they always want to spend time with you when they need something from you, it is a sign that should make us alert, because friendships are like a plant that must be constantly cultivated taking care of it and even with mutual support, because what is not Mutual does not deserve to have a place in our life, or both parties put their 100% so that things work or not work that way. On many occasions we seek the company of our friends when we feel out of the loop, when we are low in spirits, because they are like a pain pill, which in addition to curing said illness has the plus of making us feel happy like a drug. but that without a doubt does not do us much harm but on the contrary heals us and puts us in a state of maximum happiness.

Personally, I am not in favor of maintaining romantic or friendship relationships, so it is not worth spending our time with people who only hurt us, I think that it does not allow us to flow, it does not stagnate, although many times letting go is painful and cost is better than losing our essence by trying to keep afloat something that has been sinking for a long time, with people who only made us feel bad through their actions and comments committed only to hurt are people who don't even speak and expose who are hurting us change, they put themselves in victim mode, when it is the other way around, people who only think of themselves, it is their own comforts before that of others, where there is only room for their affairs, in that type of person and relationships there is no reciprocity, of course a friendship can last a long time without seeing each other, without speaking, but even with distance and time when there is a reunion we always feel that there is a balance where both parties s seek to solve problems that are affecting the other, where there is genuine concern for the other, where that friendship always wants the best for their friend, these are the friendships that are truly worthwhile, so if you have people like this in your entourage of friends , toxic and negative first encourage dialogue, let them know how they are acting because if you have always behaved well with them you deserve the same treatment in return, if they do not change you need to take extreme measures even because your peace and tranquility is worth more than being in toxic circles.

PS: It's hard to accept that there are loving and friendly relationships that don't give for more, because many times people are like shooting stars that come to teach us for a short period of our lives but they are not forever, that others will come in the future that they are eternal and that the best of all is that they always do us good.