What I really wanted

All of us have our dreams since we were kids. During childhood I wanted to work in a office or bank industry. I felt that those profession is something cool and you can be proud of coz during those times mostly of the elders were looking up to those people who are in white collar job. Thats one of the reason why I pursue my studies and finished it no matter what.

After I finished my degree in college I end up working in a boutiqe or store of a well known brand clothing in London that has a franchise here in my country as a rank and file. After more than 2 years working on the said company, I felt that I need to grow in terms of position and salary. That's the time I took the risk of applying for a higher position in other company, despite of the stability of my employment status in my previous company. I got the job as a branch supervisor to one of the biggest company in the country. And the real battle of a corporate world started. As a newbie without proper training or experience on how to handle things I survived with the help of my indirect superior and by my own strategy. The first 2 to 3 years of staying in the company, I considered all the problems in my work as a challenge, and after I passed all those challenges I felt great and excited to face again new challenges that gave lessons and learnings. In my fourth year in the that company I felt exhsusted, maybe because of the new set of bosses or maybe I felt like im doings thing repeatedly. I dont feel anymore the sense of excitement everytime that I will ready myself to come in my office, I felt bored and felt toxic. Months after my fifth year in the company something happened that made my decision to left that company.

After leaving my company which I worked with more than 5 years, I found myself working in new company as a branch manager. Yeah the position is higher from my previous job but in terms of salary I was well paid off before since my new company is just starting. But in terms of stress I can say that my new job is a little more easier. As everyone knows the higher the position the bigger responsibility that you have to handle. On my fifth year as a manager something happened that involved my health were I need to rest for 2 months and that made up my mind to look for another job after the resting period. And I decided to come back to one of the biggest company in the country and applied for a lower position. I remember during my interview, the interviewer asked me why I am applying for the lower position where I am qualified in a higher one....

As I grow older, I asked myself is this is what I really want? Higher salary... of course all of us wanted that, higher position... stability.... I also wanted those things . But at the back of my mind all I want is peace of mind. The feeling of contentment... serenity.... Maybe it will change but For now that's ALl I WANTED a peaceful mind....