Postpartum or artifice drama?

Postpartum is a serious matter, I do not have enough knowledge about this. I just read some article and post about it even before I got pregnant. Now that I already delivered my baby, I am a little bit conscious in everything I feel coz I am afraid that it might hit me.

2 weeks after I have given birth to my baby, me and my husband had a small fight or shall I say I sulked ( feeling ko nag inarte lang talaga ko) just because for a very small reason which is my hunger🤣🤣

It was Sunday morning when my older brother came to our house to fix and removed some part of the pigeon/dove cage in the main yard. Before my brother came my husband is cooking in fire wood in our balcony since my sister have lots of fire wood that was given by our neighbor, so my husband decided to cook on fire wood ( to save some electricity since we are using induction cooker). When my brother came he asked my husband to assist him. Since we are living in the back area of our house, and I cannot go out to go in our front house coz I am taking care of our baby. Its already lunch time but my husband and my brother are still busy in what they are doing so my husband decided to eat outside with my brother and get some rice in the rice cooker since the viand is already outside. When my husband came back he bring those plates and utensils that they used. I waited for him to bring the viand. Around 2 pm I felt hungry. I cannot go out since it is already raining so I chatted my husband that I am looking for my viand("diii asan ulam ko") . But the rain became strong so I chatted him again to put vulcaseal on our roof since there is a rain drop in one portion of the roof during heavy rain. It is already 3pm but my husband did not return to bring my viand, so I just ate our stocked crackers/biscuit since its already late lunch while our baby is sleeping. Thats the time that my husband cameback and saw me eating crackers, he go out again and get viand in the other house. At that moment I felt like crying. When my husband back he ask me if he will going to reheat the food and I said in a sarcastic manner that no need to reheat the food since im not going to eat anymore coz its already late for lunch. Thats the time that I burst into tears and not talked to my husband for hour. He been trying to asked me whats the matter and asking forgiveness if he done wrong makes me more pissed off. He keep on asking forgiveness without knowing what he did wrong. After I released all the annoyanace that I felt by crying, I finally answered all his question and settled the issue.

Around 5 pm he told me that he will go to barbershop to have haircut and ask what I want for snacks. I told him to buy some cheap pizza since I am a bit hungry since I did not eat lunch coz I lost my appetite to what he cooked. Its already 630Pm when he chatted me to tell that theres a long queue on the barbershop which made me pissed off again. In my mind, what that heck he knows that I did not eat lunch and I have been waiting for the pizza, he should buy pizza first so I can eat. I chatted him not to talk to me and blocked him on facebook messenger out of annoyance. Around 7 pm the wife of my cousin came to bring pansit since theres a simple celebration for their son. After I tasted the pansit I unblocked my husband and messaged him to buy kalamansi for the pansit and told him the reason of my annoyance since I am already calm maybe because of the pansit 🤣🤣🤣 since food is life 😁. My husband cameback around 730 without pizza and calamansi since he did not read my message yet. Again I did not talk to him and waited for his apology but it did not happened. He just got quiet after some attemps of talking to me without having a response. Around 9pm he lay down on the bed and fall sleep easily (maybe because of tiredness since they clean our yard )without saying sorry to me that made me pissed off more🤣🤣🤣.

Actually on the start of our relationship , we agreed that if there are issues between us, we need to settle it before we sleep. We should not sleep without saying good night and i love you to each other (teenager yarn🤣🤣), thats why I really get mad at him and started to cry silently. He suddenly woke up and tried his very best to pamper me and says sorry, but this time I still not talking to him and continued my silent cry. He just sit beside our baby's crib and look to our sleeping baby. While my tears keep on falling I cannot understand why I am like that. I am already calm and want to hug my husband but I cant stop myself from crying. Thats the time I search for postpartum symptoms and I found out that tearfulness and mood swings are some of them . Thats the time that I reached out to my husband while crying and ask him what if what I am feeling that time is postpartum . He hug me and told me that it is just a POSTANTRUMS 🤣🤣, which made me smile but he seriously told me later on that if it is postpartum I must fight it and I should keep in my mind that he will always be on my side.

As a new mom, there are things that I am doing now that I never did before. Its hard especially when you are alone with your baby, you cannot do things / household chores coz you always need to prioritize your baby. There are times that you need to pee or poo but you cannot do if your baby is crying. You can not eat on time because you will eat only if your baby is asleep.

Whether it is postpartum or simply drama, it is important that there is someone that you can lean on and talked to when you feel alone. And someone who can understand what you have been through and appreciate what you are doing as a mom.....