I remember when we went to a karaoke place with my best friends and had some fun. Before that, we ate to sang gyeopsal restaurant who serves Korean foods and side dishes, I treated them. Also, I remember those times when we went to a cheap beach resort and ate loaf breads with Pancit Canton, some junk foods and soft drinks, even some of us played a little bit on the shore. Events in our school like Acquaintance Party that we are dressed formally, sometimes fashionably and uniquely since it always depends on what genre the students wants for the occasion. Most especially, the times when we had a sleepover in our boardinghouse and we got too noisy and excited, even when we tried to lower down our voices.
Those happened from the past. The laughter and chaos that I hear whenever my day started everyday. The gossips and rumble that I encounter whenever there is a vacant time. Those times when we are having lunch together in the cafeteria and watch a noontime show while we eat together. Most especially, the times that I am with my best friends whenever those moments happen.
Despite of communicating with them through technology and internet, it still feel different when it’s face to face. You can see and interact with them; with your loved ones. You can see and feel their reactions and sincerity . The warmth that you receive from and the welcoming feeling. The places you go and bond with them, without limitations and thinking about problems. I miss being with my best friends in school since I know that my only escape in reality and problems, is school itself. I am more than willing to suffer and survive with them than drown by myself. It’s really different and feels like a dream and this is now our reality. I regretted not enjoying my childhood, teenage and adulthood years, it’s also because that I am broke, with obvious reasons. I am a timid and house-school and vice versa, type of student. Although I am not very active either in school or outside, I still try my best in everything, in making my self productive as a human and student, and finding my happiness and hobbies, that’s how I find myself enjoying writing stories. Although most of my stories from the past are unfinished, I have decided to bring back my old self and to continue writing and start again from the beginning. The things that I wasn’t able to continue doing from the past.
I missed my old self a lot as well; the old me. The old me who enjoys writing and able to accomplish the things that I wanted to do and like. I miss being motivated, although I am mostly just being myself, I can say that I am much active from the past than now honestly. Missing the old times where everything around us are so lively and enthusiastic.. Everything around us seems to have life and communicating with us. But now, time after time, it died down. I am always hoping for this pandemic to end so we can go back on how the old things work. Busy streets, more school activities and events, interactive market place for customers and lively malls especially holidays, Christmas to be exact. The smell of air-conditioning in malls as a sign of working hours for the employees. The smell of food in the school canteen and despite the noises and smokes from the vehicles everywhere, you can see that everything is just like how it was used to be.
The memories, although are kept in our minds, I know that when pandemic is gone, won’t be the same anymore since the fear of another virus and pandemic will always be present. Everything will be much stricter, everyone will be much careful and not be careless. New rules will be implemented for the safety of people. This pandemic taught us on not to be relaxed in everything we do. Us being care free from the past led us to our situation right now and I know we don’t want history to repeat itself again. It really saddens me to the point my anxieties and depression sometimes kicks in. I miss the freedom that I had when there were social and physical interactions.
Do you ever wonder when this pandemic ends? Do you feel disappointed and regretful too for not doing things that you should have done from the past? What are the things that you miss doing now? How do you feel about now? You can share with me your opinions in the comment box. I would like to listen to you and understand your situation as well.
Picture Source: https://www.dynseo.com/en/why-do-we-enjoy-reminiscing-on-our-lives-so-much/