Perfect relationship. It's what most of us wanted to have, especially the youngsters. But is there such thing as a perfect relationship? Is there a perfect match for someone? Well, there are a lot of relationships that lasted and it feels amazing for us to see especially the oldies who still stay together.

How about today's generation? I can see a lot of younger couples looking like a perfect combination, but mostly, today's cases are more on failed relationships.

Cheating. It's one of the main issues that I have observed among the young ones. I myself have been cheated maybe twice? Or I think more than that without me knowing that I am being cheated.

Cheating for me is a really big deal in a relationship. It changes your attitude towards your partner. It gives you lessons to learn and make you more cautious. You start to develop trust issues that will make it hard for you to get back on track. You can never put your broken pieces back.

The worst, it makes you mad. It makes some go crazy or obsessed with your partner. In some cases, physical abuse happen, suicidal attempts. Just because of being heartbroken.

My experience

I am known to be a quiet person. I know myself as a kind and simple one who have few trusted friends but still friendly with the others. People know me as much as I knew myself. I never had trouble with anyone.

As an honest and innocent teenage girl, I have had a long distance relationship with a very kind person. I knew him when we were kids but he lives in another province. Way back when cellphones and text messaging has just started we were able to communicate with the help of a common friend.

We never saw each other since he left when we were like 10 years old, I guess 🤔. I also didn't expect he would start to show off some feelings thru calls and text. We started as really good virtual friends since he was not there physically.

Then after some time of sharing each other's stories, making a duet on the phone, almost every day. We fell for each other. It was my first relationship. We were perfect, we do had little arguments but at the end of the day we're good.

Then he went offline. I couldn't remember how long but I was like thinking what could have happened to him. In today's generation they would refer to it as "ghosted". He just disappeared and no one's telling me why.

I cried but not that much. We have been in an LDR for two years. Then I just lost him.

Then I had my second boyfriend. He was also very kind and quiet person. Very reserved type. Doesn't talk that much but a fun person to be with. Full of humor.

The first boyfie who disappeared long ago popped out on my room door one day. I was shocked, but I'm not mad anymore since I have moved on. We're still very good friends. Finally we were able to talk in person. He's a lot more handsome now compared to when we were 10 😅 (last time I saw him in person). He has that sweet smile, looking good than the pictures he sent me.

We talked about our past once and there I found out he threw away his simcard because he found a new girl. 😤. That made me really upset deep inside it pricked my heart. I have moved on but knowing that he ghosted me for another girl, there's a part of me that wanted to slap him. 😂 He regretted it, he said. And he tried to get back with me but everything is well with me and my present boyfriend.

I never had any issues with my new guy until he became addicted to some things. Computer games, friends (whom I haven't met), and smoke and drink.

He was obviously badly influenced by those people who are not part of our circle of friends. They started teasing him with another girl and there's this woman instinct in me. My intuition is telling me something isn't right anymore. He started seeing those guys more than me and our group of friends. He lost his time for me. I was getting more suspicious. Our relationship also started getting on and off. Then finally we ended our relationship after four long years. After five days from that break up a friend slipped his tongue and told me they had been together for a year or more. I was like 😨😱😡😠🤬🤬😭... Mixed emotions.

Shocked and full of anger. I was bursting in tears and I'm tearing apart inside, I felt like dying slowly. Even if it happened a long time ago, I still feel emotional for what he did to me after all the good things I have done to him. I felt numb after crying so hard and punching the concrete wall. Then my mind is just like floating around. I couldn't believe such a quiet person could do such evil thing to me. He was never the same person I knew.

He never asked for an apology for what he did. So selfish and evil. I was so mad at him that I wanted to punch his big eyeballs 😂.

It's never easy to move on. Took me months. I drank a lot of alcohol to ease the pain coz it keeps on coming each day. I listened to music, and talk to my friends. I was able to pick myself up from getting miserable. Though it changed a bit of my personality but I have seen a better version of me.

💔💔💔

Few days ago my younger cousin Mae suddenly broke down in front of me, out of the blue.

Her partner's phone is unreachable for two days. I wondered why she acted that way and she confessed she had caught him cheating by joining an online dating site a few months back. The guy has been acting weird.

Then she told me about their ruined wedding plan. I was in the state of disbelief since he doesn't look like he's going to do such a stupid act.

The main reason of him backing out is his plan to go to Iraq. 🤔 Why would he suddenly plan to go there, then? And she tells me he would push it in the next two months. Why so sudden?

So I thought this guy must have been hiding something from her. I told her to ask him as soon as she reaches him. She checks his messenger and he's online. Mae never stopped sending her messages until he called and finally confessed he's out with another girl. The most stupid reason I heard from a guy. HE IS F* n BORED! Is that even a valid reason to cheat???

Emotions filled the room. I feel pity for my cousin. She has changed a lot physically. She looked like she's taken herself for granted.

Financially, she had never touched a penny from his salary. 🙄 Her tears continue to roll as she narrates how he treated her lately. He gave her junk foods instead of money. What does he think of her?? A first grader? Gave her crackers as she breastfeeds their child. That's too much b***sh**!

It all came back to me. The pain that I felt before, I can see it's doubled in her. That's even more painful because she has a child. I was speechless on the next things I heard. That was too much already. It makes me mad.

Next scenes are heartbreaking. I just cried silently as I watch her cry while she continue to tell the whole family about the downfall of their relationship.

How they started..

I tried to assess, what could he be referring to as "boring" in his relationship with Mae.

So I started with how they met. She met him in a dating app. This guy was not able to finish school due to financial constraints. But that didn't matter. He is a kind and cheerful person when he was introduced to us. He was greeted with warm welcome in this family. We embraced and treated him as one of us.

While Mae was sent to Cebu to take her board exam, she'd been asking for huge amounts of money because according to her she wanted to get a separate room as she said her roommates' been bullying her bcoz they don't like her boyfriend.

She didn't pass the exams. We were so sorry for her as she worked hard for it. She invited the guy to come to our place for the second time. This time he stayed for long and a month later, she got pregnant. We found out this guy went to Cebu all expense paid by her. So that could be the reason why her room mates are mad because she told me once that they were trying to scold her for calling her boyfriend everyday. Then I get it. She invited him to come and they take expensive hotel rooms. That's why they're mad at her.

Now, they started to have a family of their own. She helped him find a job and it was successful. She delivered the baby and they are just happy.

Possible reasons why he cheated..

My cousins. I have seen these kids grow over the years and one thing is constant. They're clumsy. Never cleaned the house or helped in doing simple house chores.

Any guy would be disgusted with how they are at home. Imagine you are a man coming home from work and seeing a mountain of dirty clothes in the corner.

The girl surely isn't matured enough to have her own family. She's clearly not ready for it.

Her man would come home everyday to a messy house. Then he will be the one to clean up everything around.

The guy hasn't enjoyed much of his single life. He was full of insecurities for not being able to finish his studies. But he managed to find a good paying job despite his lack of education.

Lately he's been missing home as he was not able to go home to his parents after Mae got pregnant. He's been wanting to see the relaxing beach. It only means he wanted a vacation but couldn't do it because he's more focused on raising a family, now.

Another factor is for the girl. It would be great if she would take time to fix herself like a simple comb on her hair. She's always in bed scrolling down her phone. She stays there all day. She takes care of her child but not that much, actually. It's her sisters who bathe and feed her child.

Those mentioned are enough reason a guy could get "bored" with his partner.

Maybe he found the other girl more caring and neater.

Also one factor is the circle of friends and workmates. He seemed to enjoy their company and forgot he has a child with his partner. His new girl is a common friend with a co-worker. He found comfort with his new lover so he chose to forget what he has left at home.

So maybe it's not his fault all along. Still that is not a valid reason to cheat. There is no good reason for cheating. A man who loves a woman sincerely would never give in to infidelity with those stupid excuses. Immaturity, irresponsibility and selfish thoughts made him do it.

--

Closing thoughts.

I don't know if this topic still suits the title. It doesn't matter to me, anyway. Not a big deal.

I wrote this out of rage for what happened to my cousin. All we can do is express our anger but in the end she decides for herself. It's her life, anyway. 😅