So I decided to join this 30-day writing challenge. But I want to do two prompts in a day, and I don't think it's not that bad, right?

Describe Your Personality

I might be sharing not just about my personality, rather include some stuff about me.

I am not really aware about personalities while growing up. How I wish I was educated about such stuff! That way, I would be knowledgeable about personality development, as well about life.

Back when I was younger, I think I was introvert. In school, I have friends but not the close ones. I find it hard to make friends, and I feel I am different the way I think. I want to be normal, and I wanted to be like others. Thus, I used to live relying on others' validation.

Perhaps, constant bullying may have had its effect on me. I had been bullied by relatives, even at school. I remember that someone threatened to throw stone at me if I won't tell her my name. I had no choice so I told my name, and I was allowed to go. I used to avoid certain people too because I was bullied once, I don't want it to happen again.

During our family reunions, I don't want to get anyone's attention. I just want to be like a shadow. Someone that can be seen, but not given attention. When my cousins come in, I prefer to stay in the room. When going to gatherings, I am by myself. I don't initiate conversations. I feel awkward when someone talks to me, then I respond and got run out of topics. When I reached my 20s, I think I became an ambivert. I began to gain friends. As I have friends already, I became sociable. In some instances, I don't want to be around anyone.

I realized I also have anxiety disorder and OCD. Back then, as I said already, I feel like a different person. I have so much worries. I am very worry to lose any loved one especially my mother. When an intrusive thought about losing my mom attacks me, I do have mental routines which may serve as an antidote against the bad thought. It includes mental prayers so to ease my worries. I also count when walking, then tries to avoid some numbers as the last because I felt it won't do me good. My OCD has worsened, and how I wished it will end someday. Though I know, it's already in my system, a sad part.

I do tend to be depressive at times. Change of weather like from summer to rainy season makes me sad. At this moment, we just transitioned to rainy season, and I do feel sad at times. The months of my mother's suffering makes me sad, as well as the month of her death, also with my father's.

Am I not done yet from grieving even after more than a decade? I can't say. I still cry in some instances whenever I remember them. Or maybe pain won't just go away, and it won't be too painful. Losing someone is like a deep wound. The scars may lightened, but there are occasional pains within.

Things that Make You Happy

There are a lot of things that can make me happy, and mostly are simple things. Who would he happy living with anxiety and OCD? Without it, I would be surely happy!

I'm happy to be with my wife always. Going out with family or friends, it gives me a good feeling. Going to nature places are my thing. How I wish I have enough funds to do so!

I would love to have more crypto. I know I'm not the only one who will benefit from it. Sharing and contributing others makes me very happy.

Platforms where I can write and share stuff which includes Read.Cash and Noise.Cash, and the likes make me happy. I do earn just for sharing!

There are more simple things that can make me happy. I just can't elaborate everything.